Recap: Spanko Brunch 2.0 for November 8

Tell us about your experience with canes.

Bonnie: The cane is not a standard punishment implement here in the US so I didn’t encounter it for many years. After watching Eastern European caning videos where terrified young women were beaten bloody, it became a non-negotiable limit. Online friends later convinced me that the cane could be more than a brutal torture tool.

Eventually, we ordered a short, light cane as an experiment. It offered a different feel than the paddles we used. Randy liked to combine them.

Several years ago, we bought a real punishment cane. I can attest it lives up to its name. The big cane now hangs in the basement next to our spanking bench. It serves as a special occasion implement, but we like our special occasions. 🍑

CEM: For me, canes are like paddles, wood implements where the size matters. A thin cane is not the same as a much thicker one. A thin one can be sort of "switch like" and I've seen larger ones that are like a log. Same with wood paddles. Some are like a small hairbrush, others are like oars. So that is a huge factor. And then of course the amount of forced applied behind it. So I have used them on some bare bottoms, but only smaller/thinner ones, and with less force than say a leather paddle or a strap, etc. Common sense and caution is of paramount importance. Sound punishment/discipline should never equal brutality. 

Rosco: I think of the cane as a limited number of harsh strokes methodically applied. The notion does intrigue me, albeit with trepidation.

Irene, however, likes to go with the flow so to speak. She doesn’t like to plan my discipline ahead of time, to count strokes, or to choose implements.

It would also be hard to get the intensity right. It’s great to really feel it and have my limits tested, but i also need to avoid bruising for medical reasons.

So no cane for us.

Red: I bought two canes from Aunt Kay of the DWC a longtime ago. The whippy one was too intense and wrapped on my side so threw it away. (I now wish we still had it, and used it properly.) The thick one did nothing. I have since bought some canes from Ronnie, and they are okay. Cindy does not use a cane with force, so pretty ineffectual most of the time. Occasionally, she will practise on a pillow getting the swing to strike much harder. That caning is effective. We do not do blood, or bruising, and Cindy prefers the bath brush and the short tawse.    

Barrel: Like Red, I also bought two canes from Aunt Kay, along with a VHS tape and pamphlet on domestic discipline. Regrettably the tape and paper are gone but the canes are still in use. I am caned once a month, but the intensity varies from medium strength to heavy during a session. After some errant wraparound strokes, my wife practised on a pillow and now is quite confident in wielding very accurate lashes. She delivers sets of 6 which allows her to talk to me in between and inspect the welts and weals, before planning the next round.

We have a lot of implements, but I find both canes the most intense and effective. While these thrashings leave me marked, I seem to crave another session within two to three weeks.  

A.J.: ZERO interest in canes/caning! Never wanted to wield one, or be on the receiving end (which I did ONCE, with a pro, 2 strokes, no more) of one.

I'm with Bonnie re: "European caning videos where terrified young women were beaten bloody." The key word in that sentence is "beaten." Canes deliver a beating. I don't do beatings. And I hate welts and marks on the cute bottoms I love.

And implied in those European/Russian caning videos is "ritual." With caning there is always some form of ritual before and during; The high holy ritual that leads up to the beating. The calculated ritual and counting during. Not interested in that at all. 

Maybe I'm just boring.

Loki_Darksong:

How do you feel about canes?

I like them. I have had a fascination with them since childhood when I watched a scene in the 70’s The Adventures of Tom Sawyer that featured one in use.

I consider the cane as an implement that is underestimated due to its appearance but lives up to a fearsome reputation when in action.

Have you ever caned someone or been caned yourself?

Yes to both questions.
When I had attended a monthly BDSM event here in Philly, there was a young lady who was my play partner who enjoyed being caned by me as a big part of our evening to which she would always enjoy the sore feeling afterwards for days!

Additionally I have been caned on numerous occasions when I bottomed at play parties as well as from time to time when I play with my wife.

Of course the most memorable time was the first time I was caned for my 21st birthday while at Paddles in New York.

Do you own a cane? If so, is it regularly in use? If not, would you consider trying one?

I own seven, with the last one purchased being The American Horror Story: Asylum Cane. I plan to purchase another cane at some point in the future. Unfortunately they are not regularly used due to various reasons. My work schedule notwithstanding. Hopefully that will change.

Are there certain situations in which you think a cane is appropriate?

I suppose that depends on the situation and the people involved. For example if you're within a relationship that punishments are responded to on a sliding scale, then the use of a cane could be used in response of a very serious situation. 

Graham: Avoided them for years. Once a nice lady introduced me to them, they became a regular part of my routine. Used properly, they are no worry.

Hermione: I don't even want to think about seeing any of those Eastern European caning videos. A Bonnie said, the cane is not a popular implement here, so I never had a fascination for it. We bought a short one to try, and it feels like being hit with a wooden dowel. No desire to try a longer, whippy one, thank you very much.

Slava Ukraini
Glory to Ukraine

Spanko Brunch 2.0 #678

It's the weekend and time for another fun-filled spanko brunch.

Some people hate them, some people love them, and some are on the fence about them. What am I referring to? Why, canes of course. Often considered a rather severe implement, and not to everyone's taste, canes are very prominent in spanking literature.

How do you feel about canes? Have you ever caned someone or been caned yourself? Do you own a cane? If so, is it regularly in use? If not, would you consider trying one? Are there certain situations in which you think a cane is appropriate?


Leave your response as a comment, and I will publish a summary of our discussion once everyone has had their say.

Slava Ukraini
Glory to Ukraine

Recap: Spanko Brunch 2.0 for November 1

Have your spankings ever included an equestrian theme?

Bonnie: We own a crop and he uses it periodically. But we have not ridden horses in many years.

Barrel: Our first spanking implement was a short riding crop that I bought at an equestrian store. I remember when I bought it wondering how many crops purchased there were not intended for horses. Moreover, I was a bit embarrassed when paying for it knowing it was to be used on me! Later in TTWD, I bought a longer, black crop. It has been used extensively to the point that the leather tip is fraying. Still stings like crazy and brings back great memories.

Rosco: Absolutely - much to say

Early on, before internet shopping, i summoned the courage to go to a local Western Wear store to get a riding crop. I tried to be so casual but it seemed obvious i wasn't a rider. I had a half baked story prepared. A buxom young salesgirl suggested a certain crop, very briefly threatening to demonstrate (trigger the fantasy here) then laughed it off (sadly her boss was nearby).

Also for a time Irene and I had access to a tack room full of the aroma of oiled saddles and other gear, and with a rack of crops on the end wall. The gear was no longer used but cared for as though the lady of the manor might come by anytime. Irene would don one of the hats as she whipped me soundly in that room many times. It was delicious. We were never caught, but there was always some apprehension that we might be.

We've had riding crops pretty much ever since.

The stable boy and the riding girl is one of our role play scenarios. I get in trouble if I do a poor job of cleaning and polishing Irene’s boots. I get in trouble if I’m caught peeking when shes changing. I get in trouble if I get caught smelling her clothing or the saddle after she's been riding. The class distinction is part of the fun. Irene adopts some pretty haughty accents - southern or British for these scenes.

One upside of the riding crop is it can be used to spank with precision - the thighs, the testicles (I never would have thought that to be stimulating but go figure).

Roz: We haven't used any implements with an equestrian theme. The closest was a crop, but it was a toy rather than an actual riding crop.

Wendel: We have never tried any related to equestrian. Thought about the riding crop once or twice but never bought one. 

CEM: Riding crops, yes. Spurs? Seem a tad harsh.

Ronnie: Those who have been reading my blog over the years know I have a kink for equestrian things,  even though I'm not a rider..

I have jodhpurs which I've been spanked in many times and also have a genuine riding crop which we ordered on line. I would have liked to have bought a saddle:)    

Jack: The first thing that came to mind was riding a horse afterwards, not the choice of the one spanked, but the one who gave the spanking. Talk about riding high in the saddle. 

A.J.: No. No equestrian themes or gear. (Yes; I’m boring. I need to get out more.)

But I have noticed that theme before. The “discipline” of girls/women in riding outfit, has some legs. I’m guessing the form-fitting pants has a lot to do with that. (Note: I can’t recall boys/men in that attire being spanked/whipped. Odd, no?)

And therein lies a brunch question for you, Hermione!

Prefectdt: I have been cropped, with real riding crops, many times. Batters have also frequently visited my flesh. Recently, a special BDSM crop (with a flexible shaft) was obtained, but it has yet to see two person action. Other than that, no real horsey stuff has happened to me. I have always wanted to be on the receiving end of a long training whip, so that is something to look out for in the future.

Graham: No horse fantasy but we do use a riding crop at times. Most often she uses it to control my pace while I'm going down on her after my spanking. My purchase experience was the same as Rosco's -- an almost fantasy come true!

Tom: I never even tried the crop, but I can share that saddles do seem to be a thing; one of the ladies at the second SCONY party I went to was tickled to share that she brought her saddle for people to get spanked over. I did not get a chance to try it out.

Red: We had a riding crop, but found it not very effective. No other equestrian fantasies. 

Luvinhub: A riding crop was probably our first purposeful purchase from a farm supply store, whereas before it was a ping pong paddle or something else we already had. We went away for a weekend where she put that riding crop to use in an equestrian way. She had a collar on me with a leash. She held the leash and had me prancing in a circle, swatting my ass, telling me to get my knees up. We never did that again, though.       

Hermione: We have a riding crop, dogging bat and dressage whip, all used in regular rotation. The long training whip (lunging whip) that Prefectdt mentioned would be far too unwieldy to be effective. Sadly, I gave my saddle away, never thinking it would be useful in a spanking scene.

Slava Ukraini
Glory to Ukraine

Spanko Brunch 2.0 #677

Welcome, dear friends, to another gathering to talk about spanking. “There is something about the outside of a horse that is good for the inside of a man” is a quotation that has been attributed to many people, including Winston Churchill. There is something about horses and their equipment that is good for spankers and spankees as well.

Have any of your spankings had an equestrian theme? Do you ever use implements designed for riding? What about clothing? Do saddles, bridles or any other items of leather become part of a spanking?

Leave your response as a comment and I will publish a summary of our discussion once everyone has had a chance to contribute.

Slava Ukraini
Glory to Ukraine

Recap: Spanko Brunch 2.0 for October 25

How do your pets react to spanking?

Bonnie: We’ve had a number of kitties over the years. We usually lock them out when we’re up in the bedroom. In other parts of the house, that’s less feasible. They don’t usually get involved with the action, but they are curious and crave attention. In those cases, we either find another room for them or move ourselves.

Roz: We too had cats back in the day. Occasionally they would want attention but most of the time they ran off pretty quickly when the action started lol.

A.J.: Define "join in."

Ronnie: We used to have a German Shepherd which we had to lock her in another room or she would be jumping around and trying to get in between us. 

Dan: We have dogs. We kick them out of our bedroom during spankings. They don't seem to pay much attention, though I'm sure they can hear my verbal reactions through the door. One of them has a habit of acting as "playground monitor" at the dog park, trying to break up dogs that he thinks are being too rambunctious or aggressive. If he could get to us during a spanking, I wouldn't be surprised if he tried to break it up.

KDPierre: Neither my fish nor my snakes have ever tried to intervene or even make any noise over it. ;-)

Prefectdt: There is no pet in the house now, but there used to be a wonderful Lurcher. He was never there when I was getting spanked by someone else, but he was always there when I self spanked. Which he did not allow to disturb his naps (only someone who has owned a Lurcher will know how important constant napping is to them). If I returned from a spanking adventure, with a bag of toys, he was very curious about the toys. I suppose because he could smell the spanker on them.

Wendel: No pets. So we can spank away in any room at any time. 

Red: No pets, thus spanking anywhere any time in the house.

Rosco: Funny you should ask.

We’ve had numerous dogs without a problem. But we’ve recently been dog sitting for a friend, and the critter comes to the door and barks. I found it annoying and distracting. Irene didn’t mind so much. Not sure what to do next time.

Robert: No pets currently, but several years ago, when I was spanking a new girlfriend, her dog was quite upset that I was doing so. We had to put the dog out and that dog never really liked me!

In the more common situation, our cat has absolutely no interest or concern when my wife spanks me. If she's sleeping on the nearby couch when the paddling starts, she'll sometimes get up and go to another room and get back to sleep...I guess the paddling woke her up!

Hermione: Our budgies don't seem to mind at all. The dogs are put into their crates with treats in another room and the television is turned on for them. They were unhappy at being apart from us at first but now they know the drill and are content to chew their Kongs.           

Slava Ukraini
Glory to Ukraine

Spanko Brunch 2.0 #676

The coffee's hot, so pour yourself a cup and take a seat (if you are able, that is). Many of us have animals in our lives - dogs, cats, birds, horses and other beloved pets. Their welfare is important to us, and they are part of our families.

What do your animals think of your spanking activities. How do they react? Do they interfere, join in, or just ignore it?

Leave your reply as a comment, and once everyone has had a chance to respond I will publish your thoughts in an upcoming post.

Slava Ukraini
Glory to Ukraine

Recap: Spanko Brunch 2.0 for October 18

 

Who initiated spanking in your relationship?

Bonnie: Thank you for digging up this favorite topic. It remains an unresolved question for us. I think we recognized together that we are both spankos.

Wendel: I do not remember who brought it up first. Most likely it was me.

Dan: I break the context out into two separate happenings, though the answer to who first brought it up is the same in both cases. The first time, I brought up spanking after seeing a segment on adult spanking on the old HBO series Real Sex. I don't remember a lot about the context, other than I saw that segment, was at least mildly turned on by it, and probably showed it to my wife. Her reaction was relatively positive, and for a short period we did some "funishment" role play. However, she soon became concerned that she was giving me fake punishments, basically as sexual foreplay, for real misbehavior, and that it might just be reinforcing the bad behavior. So, we stopped.

The second time was a few months later, after I discovered The Disciplinary Wives Club website and, through it, the concept of Domestic Discipline. Until than, I really had no clue that adult corporal punishment was "a thing". Unlike the Real Sex segment, which was focused on erotic spanking, something about disciplinary spankings touched something in my core. I told my wife about it, emphasizing that unlike our prior experimentation, this would entail *real* spankings, i.e. severe enough that I would experience them as real punishment and something to be avoided. She reacted positively, and 20+ years later, we're still doing it.

CEM: All of my relationships of this nature started via Internet sites where that topic, or at least fetish in general, was the subject matter so it's not like someone was "caught" off guard or surprised. It was mutually sought after. 

Roz: For us it was mutual. We were having a conversation and somehow spanking just came up, I can't remember how. We talked about it and it was quickly clear it was something we were both interested in.

Luvinhub: I'm not really sure. I know we started that direction when one day my wife grabbed me by my balls and said we were going to have a talk and things were going to change. Eventually, from there we moved into a wife led marriage and then into DD. 

Jack: Dating an older woman, in her 60's, I was in my 20's. I can't recall what I did but she said I should be given a spanking. I said at my age and laughed it off, but her look and tone of voice changed and I soon said, your kidding. She said she was not and I thought what the heck. I was soon standing before her pants and underpants around my ankles and told to get over her lap. She was not kidding, that spanking hurt, she used her hairbrush and it landed very hard and very fast. When she did stop, I layed across her lap, saying I was sorry. She then stood me up, leave the pants and underpants down and face the corner, NOW. I stood facing the corner for a long time.

Rosco: I raised it. I had a wildly successful experience at the tender age of 13, but had been rebuffed whenever I ventured into the subject for the next ten years and was pretty gun shy.

When Irene and I started dating, I knew pretty quickly she might be the one for me. She was pretty open minded so I got up the nerve to ask. She was surprised, but quickly told me if there was going to be any spanking she would be doing it and I would be on the receiving end.

It still took a little time for her to realize how serious I was, but now 46 years later she’s as into it as I am - maybe more.

Alan: In my marriage it was me that first brought it up. But in a previous long term DD relationship ,it was a former girlfriend who actually dove into it asserting that I had some self-destructive tendencies she could and did address with spanking. My impression is that it is typically the male who brings spanking up. But clearly there are exceptions to that. Also younger women, particularly GEN Z, are a lot savvier about kink in general and probably much more likely to introduce it into a relationship than earlier generations. 

Prefectdt: Never had a long term relationship with someone else who is into TTWD. Raised the subject twice, in relationships with vanilla partners. It was not well received either time.     

KDPierre: It has always been me who brought it up in several relationships over many years. It was received fairly well, BUT I had a pretty strong inkling that these ladies would be receptive before I ventured down the path, though I was never sure. So it took some nerve each time. But it was worth it.

Ronnie: P's I suppose. It started with playful swats, probably like it does with most couples. Then much later I read some throwaway paperback on holiday, I think a Jackie Collins, in which there was a brief account of a girl getting spanked and I told P about it, I remember him reading the extract and telling me so and saying it seemed to have done her some good. I think that was probably the first time P ever mentioned it, I mean the actual determined act of spanking, and told him I agreed and the rest is history.   

Red: I was the one who requested that Cindy spank me, as a way of responding to my dominant nature! It took quite a bit of convincing, and finding the Disciplinary Wives Club site helped make it more real than just her and me. Other people actually did this, and it helped their marriage, and their sex life together. I thought spanking would be sexy, and it was and still is, although the spankings are quite real now. I have now been spanked by Cindy for more than 20 years, and it is still exciting, and solves lots of little problems, reduces my stress, and makes both of us happy. plus sex the next day is amazing!
For new readers, Bonnie and I were two of the first bloggers who wrote about being spanked and being happy that we are spanked, so many years ago. My blog was spankedhubby so many years ago.
Bottoms up
red (aka dwcmike) 

Hermione: I had always longed for it, but it was Ron who first initiated it. He is a man of action, not words, so we never discussed it. He simply spanked me one evening during an erotic encounter. We were both amazed at our reactions to it, and we have never looked back.

Slava Ukraini
Glory to Ukraine