Monday, April 19, 2021

Recap: Spanko Brunch 2.0 for April 18

Have you ever had a long-distance spanking relationship?

Bonnie: We haven't been apart for long stretches of time, so I'm not certain how we would adapt. If the past year has taught us anything, it is that there are lots of things that can be done remotely if necessary. Who knew we could all be so flexible? So I think we would have to find a way to manage. 

KDPierre: I was in two. They work fine if your mind can accept parameters. If you are rigid in what you want/need they will not be satisfying, but in certain circumstances, they can be quite rewarding. The positive is that you are still dealing with a person.....a real, living breathing, human individual. That is already a big step beyond fantasy. So while the logistics can be challenging, with some adaptability and imagination, a lot can be achieved that can end up mutually satisfying.

Roz: I haven't been in a long distance relationship. During times we have been apart we have managed to adapt and find ways to keep ttwd alive.

Fondles: I think we would be able to do other things to keep the dynamic alive, although self-spanking is not something I would sign up for. 

PK: Haha - we can't always keep it going even though we live together in our empty nest! But maybe couples work harder when they're apart.

Ronnie: Never been in a long distance relationship so not sure how we would adapt but I'd like to think we would be able to find ways to manage it if we had to.

Wendel: Never been in a long distance relationship. I am sure we would figure something out.

 Prefectdt: I have travelled far to play but I have never been in what I would think of as a long distance, long term relationship. I'm not sure how I would handle that. Just make the decisions as the need arises I suppose.

Alice: I am in one now, though not in a different country. Lockdown, and my dominant having to deal with some major issues, including a family bereavement have made it very challenging. However before this I had given up on ever having this kind of relationship, so we have persevered. I had to self spank once and hated it. I also don't deal well with a spanking being threatened when I have no idea when it will happen! While he's been dealing with so much I've tried to maintain a submissive mindset to show that I care but it's not easy. I think respect and trust are very important.

Hermione: I once had a long-distance relationship, but that was way before ttwd. In those days, communication was mostly by hand-written letters, with the occasional phone call. Unless the phone call was in private (his phone wasn't), I can't see how spanking might have fitted in.

That's all for this week. Stay safe, wear your mask, and get your jab.

From Hermione's Heart

Sunday, April 18, 2021

Spanko Brunch 2.0 #379

Once upon a time there were two bloggers, Daisy and Davey. They lived on separate continents and, although married, they were unable to live together because of immigration restrictions. Nevertheless, they maintained a loving DD relationship. They would talk regularly via Skype, Daisy would confess her transgressions, then Davey would tell her to self-spank. It worked for them, although I haven't heard from either of them for a long time so don't know their current situation. Would it work for you? 

Have you ever been in a long-distance relationship that included spanking? If so, how did you cope? If not, can you see yourself in such a relationship? What would you do differently?

Please leave your response as a comment. You may remain anonymous if you wish. Once everyone has had a chance to speak, I will publish an edited summary of our discussion.
From Hermione's Heart

Wednesday, April 14, 2021

Still in Lockdown

We are still in lockdown here, most businesses closed, no indoor dining, pickup at the door or delivery from some of the larger non-essential places. I wonder if nurseries are considered an essential service. Otherwise, where will everyone buy their summer bedding plants?












Stay safe everyone!

From Hermione's Heart

Monday, April 12, 2021

Recap: Spanko Brunch 2.0 for April 11


This week we discussed the use of titles.

KDPierre: Rosa and I don't use anything like this, but Nickki seems to like to have me use different 'titles' at times. It's just a personal preference I suppose. I've done it both ways in the past as well, and when I did it more formally it seemed like a big deal, but when I didn't I realized it made little difference. It can add an edge, but only if it seems important to the parties involved. 

Roz: During play time Rick is often Sir, sometimes Daddy. Sometimes it's a requirement but mostly it's just something that evolved from the early days when spanking was purely for fun and may be scene based. It does add to the tone.

Anon: My spankees know not to fail to use the term Sir throughout any spanking. The last time one salutation was missed while a spankee was counting spanks as ordered, 50 hairbrush spanks were added. She never forgot again.

Wendel: "Yes Sir" and "Yes Ma'am" are the common titles. It is just something we have always done. 

Rosco: We do all kinds of role play. Mostly Irene initiates it and I’m not really sure who she is. Depending on the situation, I’ll call her mistress or ma’am or princess or queen or senorita or fraulein or Mrs Robinson etc.

She calls me by name but describes my behavior as pouty, petulant, obstreperous, disrespectful etc.

Jack: My wife decided after the first punishment spanking I would address her as Mommy. She told me her mother said once she got married she would be a wife, friend, and Mommy. She did not understand at the time, but that first spanking she did. I will address her as Mommy until told otherwise. 

Morningstar: In my past relationship I used to HAVE to use the term 'Sir', honestly I found it tiresome and not natural. Being the brat I can be, I used to say "Yes Sir ... No Sir" and then mumble "3 bags full Sir", which didn't win me any brownie points.

Now in this relationship, the only time I use 'Sir' is when I write my blog or when we used to play publicly, otherwise he doesn't want any titles. Much more sensible in my mind, though I could see using an honorific if you are role playing. (We don't - never have never will - small smile.)

 Barrel: With normal spankings, we don’t use any special names as she usually just wants to get started. However, during our longer and more intense sessions where she will lecture or question me during a pause, I refer to my wife as ‘Miss’. The hardest question for me is when she asks if I am able to take more, and the answer she has trained me to give is, ‘only if they are harder, Miss’.

Good topic this week. Thanks.

Prefectdt: It depends upon who I am playing with. I am usually happy to go with the other parties wishes on this as long as they are not too complicated. "Princess Caranthorp The Third Of Thrashsilvania" for example, is a bit too much to remember in the heat of play.

If I am asked for a preference, I kind of like being referred to as "Boy" when I am on the receiving end.

Ronnie: I've used Sir when we've done role play and I sometimes cheekily call P Sir during a spanking. 

A.J.: Have her call me "Sir" or "Master"? Nope. Would not even think of doing that.

1. I wouldn't want that.
2. The pointing and laughter from her!

Bonnie: I have addressed him as Sir on occasion when it seemed like it fit the mood, but it's not a regular feature of our sessions.

Alice: Yes, I address him as Sir when we are playing. It does make me feel more submissive and gets me into that headspace. If he wants me to use it at other times he uses my full name, rather than my shortened name as a signal.

Hermione: I sometimes call Ron "Sir" and it always makes him smile. There's no requirement for it; I do it just for fun.

And there you have it! Stay safe and wear your mask.

From Hermione's Heart

Sunday, April 11, 2021

Spanko Brunch 2.0 #378

Welcome back, dear friends. I hope you've had a good week and are staying safe. Let's discuss spanking. 

Do you or your partner ever use titles like Sir, Master, Mistress or something similar when it's time for a spanking? Are these titles used because of a demand or rule, or are they used spontaneously? How do they affect your interaction?

Please leave your response as a comment. Once everyone has had a chance to reply, I will publish an edited summary of our conversation.

From Hermione's Heart

Thursday, April 8, 2021

What a Bum Bum!

Ron and I have been enjoying a series called How it Really Happened with moderator Hill Harper. One season gave details on all the famous mass murderers and how they were caught. The season we are watching now features famous musicians and actors, and how they met their sad ends. Last night we saw how Selena Quintanilla, a Latina singer on the verge of releasing her first English-language album, was murdered by a trusted friend. 

One of the songs she sang on the show made our ears perk up. The lyrics sounded like "bitty bitty bum bum". I found the song on YouTube and thought you might like to enjoy it with me. Hint: Selena's bum is anything but bitty. There are some lovely shots of it in the video.



From Hermione's Heart

Wednesday, April 7, 2021

Colour me Happy!

I'm doing the happy dance today. I finally got an appointment for one of the covid vaccines, so in two weeks both Ron and I will be protected.  Our second shots are booked for August, which is the standard wait time here.

To celebrate, here are some silly FAILs that will make you smile.

 

Mermaids have butts?



April Fool!



There's a third option?



'Tis the season to be jolly



I want my money back.



Come a little bit closer...



A nice souvenir of London -- NOT!

From Hermione's Heart

Monday, April 5, 2021

Recap: Spanko Brunch 2.0 for April 3

What's your take on using a professional spanker or spankee?

Roz: What a great question. For me spanking is something I enjoy within my relationship, it brings a greater level of connection and intimacy and enhances our sex life. It is also such an intimate act. Therefore no, I don't think I would go to a professional. 

QBuzz: When I was single I did visit a few professional spankees to 'keep my hand in' ;)
As for my submissive side, I took the opportunity to explore my bi curiosity and meet up with dominant older gentlemen rather than pro spankers/dommes.

I love the idea of being a pro spanker/spankee but for men I think it's just a fantasy :D
Again when I was single I did enquire about doing some modelling as a male spankee (which is usually unpaid, and understandably so). But I never heard back.

 Joe: This is a great question and I am sure everyone has different thoughts on it. For me it is something I have thought about for a long time and would accomplish a few things. My wife is still unsure of giving a strong spanking, I have a desire to have my spankings witnessed. Visiting a professional can show my wife a strong spanking can be given without causing real harm and how to do it also I can have a witness without shocking a friend. We have talked about it and we just may do it.

Wendel: I would not go to a professional spanker. For myself the enjoyent of being spanked is not just the act or the pain but also comes from knowing who is doing the spanking. Beside, the Misses can and has spanked quite hard in the past so I am good there. 

Prefectdt: Would you ever consider going to a professional for a spanking? - God yes and as soon as it is possible I will again.

If so, what would be the circumstances? The circumstances would be that I want a competent spanking from someone who is experienced and skilled, has a good selection of toys, offers their services in a place where I can go ouch and argh as loudly as I need to and hopefully enjoys their work

On the other hand, does the idea of being a professional spanker (or spankee) appeal to you? - I would love to be a professional spankee but I doubt if I would get many clients.

A.J.: "Would you ever consider going to a professional for a spanking?

Uhhhh, will actually, I have.

"If so, what would be the circumstances?

The circumstances was my spanking GF had a career change and moved far, far away! With almost all the women I met hinting "No!" I began to really miss it. And one day I was in Los Angeles, discovered one of those underground papers that had ads for giving and taking spankings. Come in, pick your spanker/spankee, and go home all pink and tingly. No sex!

It got to me. I decided to do it. And let me be very clear, IT TOOK ME A LONG TIME TO DECIDE TO GO THOUGH WITH THIS! For more than a day before I made that call, I wondered if I should be doing this at all! It was not an easy decision. Even walking into the building that afternoon I was nervous, doubting myself, and ready to turn around.

In the end I went. To a place that had maybe 4 or 5 women on staff, comfortable being on either side of a lap. I told the woman I had scheduled with: "Really new at this! Never done this before. So I'm a bit nervous."

And she was wonderful. Understood, explained everything. Made jokes. Spanked me otk and bare-bottom, and let me return the favor. And we were both all smiles!

It was fun! On the way out she introduced me to the other women working there, "This is A! It's his first time and I just had him over my knee! He's a nice guy." (That was a recommendation to them that I was OK to play with.) And they were all so nice. Asked me how it was, what happened, was my tush sore, was it hard, and - will you come back...?

Yes. And I did. Met one girl who became a favorite. One day after we did switch play I asked her if she was native Californian or from somewhere else? Somewhere else. "Where?" She lived 9-miles - from my boyhood hometown. We were neighbors!!

It was fun and I never had a bad playtime. (I should note that it is usually a 1-hour session. But later I always opted for 2-hours because I know I'm going to talk to them so much because THEY ARE SO DAMN INTERESTING! All of them have great stories and want to hear yours. Even though we only talk for that second hour, I still compensate them for their time. Or tip them REALLY well if we go over.)

It has been a while but would I go again? Yes.
Recommend you go if you are thinking of it? Yes.

And by the way, I know of two pro women; one with a client who brings his wife to be spanked/played with; the other who has a married couple visit with her and she does BOTH of them! Together!

So, recommend you go with your spouse? Yes! Neither of you will forget it.

Graham: Absolutely! When I was single, I visited many pros and got to know some of them fairly well. Never once had a bad experience, and it only got better as the pro learned more about you.

I took girlfriends with me on more than one occasion. They always had fun and liked the pro. We never had sex at the establishment, but things sure heated up once we arrived home!

Now that I've been married 20+ years, I've not returned to any pros. My wife has no interest in a joint visit, and things are so good at home that I have no reason to pressure her.

KDPierre: In a word, no. The money aspect would color things in a way that would be difficult for me to ignore. I get why some people do it and also why it may work for others, but I think there are enough people around for me who can take on that role without money changing hands. I'm not sure why money so negatively affects things for me, but it does with so many things. (We have a pool table right in the center of our living room, had it for decades, and in all that time my one rule for guests, [besides being careful with the felt and not putting drinks on it] has been: no money bets. I hate playing cards for money as well. Anything. Money just makes things...tainted.)

Hermione: I think that in cases where a partner simply won't agree to spank, it's acceptable to seek out a professional to do the job, as long as both parties agree to it.  I'm thankful that it isn't necessary for us. I would not care to be a professional spankee, but perhaps being a "Domme for a Day" might be fun.

ricky: Hi Hermione,
Long time no email from me. My fault. I've had to change residences recently and had no online access, but fortunately have now, and want to say hello and chat again, if that's OK.
Yes, I've been to professionals because of their very professionalism and accessibility. I found them all very courteous, instructive, compassionate, and in no way sadistic, nor cruel.
I am too timid to ask a woman I've become friendly with to spank me, let alone the other way
around.
So spank me! (PLEASE!!!)

Those were awesome answers! Stay safe, everybody.
From Hermione's Heart


Sunday, April 4, 2021

Spanko Brunch 2.0 #377

Welcome to our weekly brunch. You are all invited to share your thoughts here. A comment that my dear friend Red made on a recent post was the inspiration for this week's topic. 

Would you ever consider going to a professional for a spanking? If so, what would be the circumstances? On the other hand, does the idea of being a professional spanker (or spankee) appeal to you?

Please leave your response as a comment below. Once everyone has had a chance to speak, and all the hidden Easter eggs have been found, I will publish a summary of our conversation.

From Hermione's Heart