Sunday, January 23, 2022

Spanko Brunch 2.0 #419

Welcome to our weekly get-together. Today I'd like to explore a subject that I have very little experience with. Lately I've noticed that tattoos seem to be pretty popular. Many of the chefs on my favourite cooking shows have very prominent ones, and tattoos seem to be obligatory in order to work in televised animal rescue. So here's the question:

Do you have any tattoos that are obvious when you are being spanked? If so, was there a specific intention behind the location? If not, would you consider getting one? What design would you choose?

Please leave your response as a comment below. Once everyone has had a chance to speak, I will publish an edited summary of our discussion.

From Hermione's Heart

Thursday, January 20, 2022

Going Shopping

The recent snowstorm and subsequent cleanup caused me to postpone my usual weekly shopping trip. I always phone my next-door neighbour to see if she needs anything before I go. She doesn't drive, and her usual weekend shopping trips with a friend were cancelled because of the pandemic. Another neighbour and I help her out whenever we can. But for the most part, the things on her list are the sale items she sees in the weekly flyers, not staples or necessities. I've bought her two tubs of ice cream three weeks in a row because it was on sale! Sometimes she doesn't care for the store I am planning to go to (I alternate between two stores) because something is on sale at a better price somewhere else. Too bad!

Yesterday I phoned her to let her know I was okay to travel today, and was there anything I could get for her while I was out? But no, I was too early, She hadn't received her weekly flyers and had to check them first. Oh. Well, was there something she needed, whether it was on sale or not? No.

This lady knows what time I always leave the house to shop, and I predict she'll phone two minutes before I'm scheduled to leave, with her list. She's done it before. 

But that's enough complaining. Here are some items spotted on previous supermarket forays.


I'll take two dozen of the masked cookies!

From Hermione's Heart

Tuesday, January 18, 2022

Just Another Canadian Winter

Like most of the northeastern portion of North America, we were hit with quite a snowstorm yesterday. It snowed the previous night and then all day, so by evening the snow was pretty deep. Today we will spend a few hours shoveling the white stuff from the driveway if our electric snowblower can't handle the load. But when you live in Canada, it's pretty much par for the course.

Handy for cooling your beer

Kittehs don't like snow

Winter fun!

Come Spring, you'll find it all!

From Hermione's Heart

Monday, January 17, 2022

Recap: Spanko Brunch 2.0 for January 16

Do you or your partner have uneven bottom cheeks?

Wendel: No difference. Beautiful on both sides and spanked equally. 

Roz: Interesting question Hermione, I haven't noticed any difference, although that's not say there isn't one. It would seem neither has Rick as he seems to spank evenly.

Bonnie: My resident expert says I am symmetrical. But of course he had to add, "Wider at the lower end." Yeah, that too.

Jeanie: I've been complimented on my bottom cheeks in the past, and I happen to find the female derriere very erotic, partly because of that symmetrical spherical balance. So I can't add anything there.

As we've discussed together, I got a late start as a spanko, but have had a wide variety of experiences since then. If left up to me, I'd receive moderate hand spankings only, but life would get dull  with this monotony, I guess. Many years ago I had an involvement with a Top who was very strict, so I purposefully praised him after giving me just what I wanted, a hard hand spanking that left me replete but not worn out. I next tried to use a little conditioning by rewarding him with some very tasty sex and I thought our relationship had settled into a comfortable groove. 
The very next night, however, he had an appetite for heavier discipline. He told me that he was going to "Old Glory my butt." He told me to fetch the heavy wooden paddle and the cane, two implements I hate due to their severe results. On my left butt cheek, he repeatedly struck me with the paddle, on my right he aimed numerous cane welts. The finished appearance was a field of solid bruises (that made me see stars) on one side and red stripes (that had me in tears) on the other. (Get it? Kind of an American flag-like appearance.) This lack of symmetry hurt like the dickens, I can tell you!
That's as close as I can get to addressing asymmetry in asses.
Doug: There probably is a slight difference between the two sides, but it is not visibly noticeable. Both sides are spanked equally - receiving the same number of strokes - but the one further from my wife when she paddles me actually receives a somewhat harder spanking since the paddle is moving slightly faster when it strikes that cheek. 
Rich Person: Oh, I thought you meant over time. That seemed like a very indelicate question.

You know, the relative sizes of the cheeks has never caught my attention. So, I guess the answer must be No. Although, I could just be distracted.
Simon: I'm pretty sure that my cheeks are the same, certainly nobody has ever mentioned any difference. Of course they are, sadly, much larger now than when I first got into spanking over 40 years ago.
Prefectdt: This Brunch had me digging in my own archives for photographs of my battered bum, after playing. Looking hard at several images, I could see no remarkable difference, in size and shape, between the two buttocks. The most common comment I get about my derrière, is that it is smaller than was expected, after I have disrobed, than the spanker thought that it would be.
KDPierre: I can’t think of any area of my body that is perfectly identical left to right. Some features more than others and my butt discrepancies are more subtle but there nonetheless. I have a kind of dimple on the right that is not repeated on the left. Naturally the occasional beauty mark and little mole patterns are different and as for treatment? Given that my spankers are all right handed, my right cheek always seems to get the worst of it. 

Odd question but fun!
Rosco: I have noticed no difference and regularly examine them up close when we engage in reverse cowgirl cunnilingus.

Irene has mentioned that one of her breasts is larger than the other, but I can’t remember which. I’ll check when she brings me my morning cappuccino.
A.J.: I first heard about that difference decades ago when watching Johnny Carson, who did a bit where he had photos of the famous and reversed the negatives so the left side of the face matched the right. Amazing difference, and surprised I had never noticed before.

What I HAVE noticed (because I pay attention, dammit!!) is the difference in women's breasts. So I find it odd that I never noticed, or thought to look, that it was the same in bottoms! I promise - from now on - I'll pay more attention!!!

(I wonder if this is also true of legs...?)
Ronnie: I haven't noticed any difference and P hasn't said there is but I will ask him next time I'm over his lap:)
Morningstar: After he stopped laughing....... Sir Steve said there's no difference between right and left.

However I can say the right cheek is much more sensitive than the left. It just hurts more on the right side....... weird no?

Hermione: This topic came to mind because I wear panties and a t-shirt to bed, and I find that the panties always ride up on the right side, leaving the right cheek exposed. I asked Ron to look and see if my buns were of different sizes, and he said they were different shades of red, but he would fix that.

Jack: Showed my wife, she laughed and said when she is spanking me the only concern is to insure both cheeks are very red, meaning sitting will be hard, since I cannot favor one cheek or another.

Thanks for your investigative reporting on this subject!
From Hermione's Heart

Sunday, January 16, 2022

Spanko Brunch 2.0 #418

Welcome to our weekly brunch. You're just in time. We all know that one side of the face isn't exactly the same as the other (and if both sides are identical, you're one in a billion). So what about other parts of the body, like the part we spank?

Have you noticed a difference in size or shape of your or your partner's butt cheeks? How do they differ? Does this lead to more attention on one side than the other?

Please leave your response as a comment below. Once everyone has had the opportunity to join in, I will publish an edited summary of our discussion.

From Hermione's Heart

Thursday, January 13, 2022

Dumb is Forever

It's amazing how stupid some people can be.

From Hermione's Heart

Tuesday, January 11, 2022

From the Top Shelf - The Experiment

Our first story for the new year is by that prolific spanking writer, GeorgieC. This story came as a holiday present from him and I am delighted to share it with you. Enjoy!


"Come on, Fortescue.  You can't be a swat all your life.  Come and join us in a game of soccer."

Fortescue shook his tousled head so rapidly that his owl-like glasses nearly fell to the floor.  "No, I can't.  The experiment I'm studying is at a vital phase.  I must go and see how it's doing.  I need it for top grades. My University place depends on it."

Leybridge Sixth Form Academy had a good reputation for University admissions, and Fortescue was expected to easily achieve a place at a prestigious seat of learning, despite his own seeming self-doubts.

He turned and, as fast as he could (which wasn't very fast at all in truth), he waddled away into the West Wing, and up to the science laboratory on the top floor where he spent every lunchtime.

Bill Banks - for it had been he who had attempted to get the swat to socialise - sighed.  He didn't mind Fortescue, despite his rather strange view of Life.  He sort of felt sorry for him.  Unlike the other lads.  They called him "Prof" if they were feeling a bit kind, "The Geek", or "Swatty Pants", if they weren't.  They didn't feel kind very often.  They never passed over any opportunity to trip him up, or knock his books on the floor, or inflict any one of a thousand other torments upon him.

Unfortunately a small number of that group had overheard the conversation.

"Off to his beloved experiment again, huh?" said Morris, the self-appointed leader of the gang.  "How about we see if we can't help him, hey, lads?  Let's go up to the lab.  It would be a shame if anything got broken though, wouldn't it?  We'll just have to … protect him and his experiment.  We need to ensure he gets the grades he deserves".

"No, no, don't - leave him alone" pleaded Banks, but the die was cast, and the mob set off in pursuit of its quarry.  In through the door and up the two flights of stairs they charged.  Bill Banks, being no slouch himself, managed to keep up with them and pushed his way to the front of the throng as they jostled outside the door of the lab.  He knew he couldn't prevent them spoiling Fortescue's hard work, but he thought he may be able to minimise the effect of the raging tornado about to engulf him.

The door was pushed open suddenly, by whom no one was sure, and the group of lads stumbled into the lab.  But they stopped short as the bench where they had expected to see him working was empty.  It took a second or two for them to realise where he was.  He was stood by the window, binoculars in hand, looking back at them, shocked and instantly crimson faced.

"What you doin', Forters?" asked Banks.

Fortescue just stood frozen, his mouth opening and shutting.
"What you up to?  What you looking at?" snarled Morris, and grabbed the binoculars.  The swat had no response and his hands fell limply to his side.

Morris raised the binoculars to his eyes and scanned the yard below.  Groups of students were playing games played throughout history, or else were huddled together plotting and planning who fancied who. One or two pairs of boys and girls who had already ascertained who fancied who were separate from the main bunches of their companions, but none were acting inappropriately. Just chatting quietly away. Nothing worth spying upon.

Morris was puzzled.  He continued to scan the yard and then raised the glasses to the main academy building across the yard.  Classroom after classroom swept by his gaze, until a slight movement in one window caused him to pause.

It took him a moment to get his bearings, and in that moment he realised he was looking straight into the Headmaster's office.

And there, draped over the back of the big armchair in the room was a girl.  No doubt it was a girl, as her feet were slightly lifted off the floor. The feet gave a little involuntary twitch, as Morris realised that he was viewing a caning. Confirmation that girls were treated the same as boys.  He recognised the activity because it was exactly the same as he himself had often been treated, usually for his bullying, a caning bent over that self-same armchair.  It was why he usually wore a couple of extra pairs of football shorts under his trousers just in case.

But as he turned his gaze upwards from the twitching feet, he came across a band of white.  He was puzzled for an instant and then suddenly realised what he was looking at.  Round the girls' knees rested her white knickers.  And as he carried on scanning upwards there were two round, chubby, and totally bare bottom cheeks in view.  She was being caned just as the boys were.  But, unlike the boys, she was getting it with her pants and her tights down.

"Blimey" he said to his mates.  "It's a girl.  She's getting the cane!  Bare arsed too!"  There was a sudden rush to the window of the lab.

Two more twitches of the feet and the girl slid backwards off the chair, stood up, and nodding in recognition of what the Headmaster was obviously saying to her, pulled her pants upwards to their normal resting place, then reached down and pulled her tights back up giving another flash of her snowy white briefs, straightened down her skirt and disappeared from view as she left the room.

"Mandy Lewis!" gasped Morris.  "You dirty little sod, Fortescue.  You've been watching the girls get whacked."

Fortescue looked suitably chastened and blushed a deeper hue.

A thought occurred to Morris.  "Is it often bare bum?"

Fortescue nodded slightly.  "Yes.  In fact for the girls it's always, as you put it, 'bare bum'. He always makes them, you know, take them down.  He only does that to the girls though.  Only the girls.  They always have to pull down their tights and then he makes them pull down their … underwear."

"How many bums have you seen then?  I mean, how many girls have you actually seen being caned on their bare backsides?"

Fortescue bowed his head and mumbled.  "Er - dozens.  Maybe a hundred, … or perhaps more?  Pretty well every girl in the academy actually.  The Head has caned every single one at some time.  I think he rather likes doing it.  He does at least a few every day.  Every day.  He did all the girls of Form 6B1 one lunchtime last week.  One after the other.  And they all had to …. you know … pull them down.  As I say, I think he likes it."

Morris' mind was racing to places it would be better not to race.  The whole of 6B1?  That's at least two dozen girls.  All in one day.  The Headmaster had made all the girls of 6B1 line up outside his study, come in one at a time with the others listening outside, made them bare their backsides completely in front of him, bend right over the chair and then whack them with the cane? And then get the next one in.  The whole form.  Every single one of them.  It was not just Fortescue who was a dirty sod, it seems.

"Have you seen Tracy Evans with her knickers down?  Or what about Sue Collins?  Have you seen her get it? Leia Hudson?  Surely not Leia?  She's as much a swat as you are."

Fortescue nodded again.  "Er, yes.  All of them.  Even Leia."

He blushed even more, if that were possible.  Leia was a kindred spirit, an intelligent and well-behaved girl normally.  She even had glasses like his.  He couldn't imagine what fault the Headmaster had dreamed up to get her to his office for 'disciplining'.  But the Head had found some reason, and she had to do what all the others did, she had to lower her tights right down, and then 'drop them' and bend right over, and when Forters saw her "getting it" on her bare you-know-what he had a slightly greater frisson than normal.  For weeks after if he saw anything pale blue he had a little flashback.  Hers were quite a nice shade of pale blue, draped around her knees.  And whenever he saw her in the following days he felt a very strange sensation 'down there'.

"You haven't seen Diane Craven with them down have you?  Blimey, that would be a sight, bent over like that, getting a whacking."

"About ten times actually.  She seems to get called to his office a lot.  And he always makes her stay bent over up on the chair a long time after he's caned her.  A long, long time.  I think she may be a bit of a favourite of his."

Morris' mouth dropped open.  "And she had to pull them down too?"

"She did.  It's funny, she always wears white ones." he added, with scientific precision and observational accuracy.  He had developed quite a specialist subject knowledge, but not one he could easily choose for Mastermind.  'Colours of the knickers of the girls of the academy'  was quite a limited topic.  He didn't mention to the others at this point that he kept a little notebook of the details.  Day, time, girl's name, colour of her knicks, how many whacks.  He'd keep that information to himself for the moment.

Ever one for scientific precision Fortescue couldn't stop his mouth from working.  "Well, she doesn't wear them when she's actually getting it of course." he added.  "She has to take them right down then so that he can …."  His voice trailed away as he realised he was saying too much, and displaying too much of an enthusiasm for his subject.

But he wasn't the only one.  For once in his life everyone was listening to him, hanging on his every word.  Morris gasped at these pieces of minutiae, but his attention was suddenly distracted by movement back in the office.

"Bloody hell, it's Trudy Davies now!"

They all now jostled to find the best vantage point.  Even without binoculars, even at the distance, they clearly saw a blonde girl approach the armchair from the side of the room where she had been lectured for the last few minutes, out of their view, lift up her skirt right up and grab the waist band of her tights and lower them.  She then reached again under her skirt which had fallen back into place and tugged her knickers down to her knees.  Even from here they could see they were pink.  Another for Forter's records.  She held the back of her skirt right up, exposing the target area unknowingly to them all, and hoisted herself over the back of the armchair.  The Head tapped his cane on the upturned bottom that was in clear view.  The upturned bottom that was as bare as the day she was born.

"Bloody hell….." said Morris again, as the cane whooshed down in the silent distance.  The feet gave a twitch.  And another twitch …. and another ….. six times.

The teachers never did figure out the sudden interest in science.  They never did understand why the boys, who had never shown any interest previously spent every lunchtime working away in the lab..

True - they never really produced any worthwhile results for the amount of time they spent there, but they were at least keen.  Much better than wasting their time playing football.  Much more wholesome pastime.  They obviously had developed a new outlook on life.  The had obviously seen the light.

Thank you GeorgieC!

From Hermione's Heart

Monday, January 10, 2022

Recap: Spanko Brunch 2.0 for January 9

Have you made and kept any ttwd New Year's resolutions?

Bonnie: I'm sorry, but I'm coming up blank here. We're just keepin' on keepin' on.

Wendel: No changes. Maybe more spankings but that is about it.

Doug: For me, a "better spanking" would be a longer spanking. On my request last fall, my wife started paddling me longer than before, but we have no plans to increase its length any further for the new year. She finds our twice-weekly paddling sessions physically taxing, and I appreciate her good efforts.

Roz: Great question Hermione, over the years our relationship has changed a lot. From having a domestic discipline relationship to spanking being for fun and erotic purposes only and elements of Daddy/lg. Sometimes all of the above depending on the moment and situation. Some of these changes might have occurred over the new year period. I can't now recall.

We haven't had an active spanking dynamic for some years now so no spanking resolutions this year. Now days spanking is purely for fun and occasional. I would like more and longer spankings.

Jack: My wife will decide on the spankings, I will say she has moved the bath brush from hanging in the hall to the kitchen. I had to ask why, she smiled most of your spankings happen in the kitchen.

Prefectdt: I have lost a lot of contact threads, because of events over the past two years, so it looks like, at least for a while, I will not  be trying to play with fellow amateurs so much, in the near future. Because of a reduced social life, the fun budget is looking very healthy, though. So this year I think I will be planning more pay to plays. It is often the safest option for an unattached guy, these days.

KDPierre: No, Rosa and I always get geared up in January for whatever projects and purchases we are pondering for around the house and yard. 

Ronnie: No changes here, though I'd like more spankings.

Barrel: Yes…indirectly. Our spanking regimen has been impacted by doctor’s appointments, health issues with parents and my business travel. All that has spawned issues between us. We addressed it. My wife put an appointment on her calendar at 4:00 PM every day to remind her to “Plan Build Up”. Se we have a daily prompt to work on a build up to a spanking. This is huge for us as she now thinks about spanking daily. It is a bit too early to judge is this is a quantum step to more spanking, but we both hope so.

This is a baby step which is good. Plus, I will retire in the next month so we will have unlimited opportunities to do what ever we want to do. TTWD???

Hermione: I didn't need to make any resolutions as far as ttwd goes because everything is just fine. If Ron made some he hasn't told me.

Good luck to those of you who made resolutions!

From Hermione's Heart

Sunday, January 9, 2022

Spanko Brunch 2.0 #417

How's 2022 going for you so far? Pandemic-wise it seems like a replay of 2020 and 2021, but with better masks and more cases. How long will this Groundhog Day way of life continue? But there are good things in life, like spankings, that help me focus my thoughts in a more positive way. 

Did you or your spouse/partner make any New Year’s resolutions or commitments to spank differently in 2022?  How are you trying to expand, change or grow your routine to make spanking better in the New Year?

Please leave your response as a comment. Once everyone has had an opportunity to reply, I will publish an edited summary of our conversation. Thank you, Barrel, for the topic suggestion.

From Hermione's Heart

Saturday, January 8, 2022

You Completed the Caption

 It seems this cartoon is popular, and some of you have already seem it. Nevertheless...

LT: Seriously Dad! If your going to give Mom a spanking, do it the correct way! Since you're right handed, Mom should be facing the other way across your knee! Everyone knows that! 

KDPierre: I remember when this card came out! In fact I still have it in my collection. Anyway, this one is ripe for SO MANY possibilities. It's just a matter of how far down the rabbit hole you wish to descend. LOL Here are a couple:

Relatively innocent
"Hey, you remember how you told me before how I couldn't get a new I-Phone? Well, when you two are done, I suggest we all take a nice trip to Best Buy, or by dinnertime everyone's gonna know what you two are into, starting with Gramma."

"Yo, Pops. Hold up a minute. Let me get you the paddle Jimmy and I use when we play like that. It works great and really is easier on your hand."

"Daaaaaa----ad, no fair! How come you never play like that with ME?"

Anon: Why does mom get to keep her panties on! Not fair!!!! 

Jeanie: "Dad, my boyfriend, Chad, in the fourth grade, says that you should never start a spanking before discussing a safeword. Do you and Mom have one? May I suggest the "red, yellow, and green light" system? It gives everyone a clear idea of how things are going... Chad also says that a proper spanking doesn't start until the panties are pulled down. I've been listening from my bedroom, and you two have been playing for about ten minutes, but Mom's still wearing her underwear. When are those knickers coming off? And are you sure that using just your hand will get the job done? Most submissives love seeing marks after a thrashing. May I suggest you use your belt, Daddy-dear? The last time Chad used his belt on my bottom was so hot; I was bruised for days! Of course, Mom prefers using the wooden spoon when paddling me. It stings like the dickens, let me tell you!

Brett: "Dad, stop! There are many discipline strategies that are more effective than corporal punishment. Violence is not the answer." 

Prefectdt: I'm trying to sleep! If you two don't keep the noise down, you're both up for a time-out.

Wendel: I have this one in my collection, but I will make up something else.
“Like you always say when you spank me: This is gonna hurt you more than it hurts me.”

Tankerton Latch: "The spanking Daddy's giving you now, Auntie Jill, is nothing compared to then one you'll get if Mom catches you!" 

That was fun! Please stay for brunch. It's almost ready.

From Hermione's Heart

Thursday, January 6, 2022

Complete the Caption

Let's start the new year off with a clever cartoon. What is the little girl saying to her parents when she walks into their bedroom unannounced?

Fill in the speech bubble by leaving a comment. I'll reveal what was in the original on Saturday.

In case you missed it, our friend KDPierre is also doing a semi-regular picture caption post, so hop on over and give his a try too.

From Hermione's Heart

Monday, January 3, 2022

Recap: Spanko Brunch 2.0 for January 2

What is your favourite brunch topic from the past?

Bonnie: Congratulations, Hermione, and thank you for doubling our brunch tradition. My favorite brunches were those that generated a lot of back and forth discussion and the prompt was merely a starting point. One I particularly like was Terps' question, "Do regular spankings satisfy a craving or merely heighten it? back in 2008. 

Roz: Congratulations Bonnie and Hermione for bringing us this wonderful cornerstone of our little corner of blogland for so long and thank you. Wow, 2006!

Hard to pick a favourite topic but I enjoyed the fun topics that generated a lot of discussion, such as favourite/least favourite implements, fantasy place to be spanked etc.

Jack: The topics that related to places that spankings took place, either for fun or punishment. 

KDPierre: I like any topic that requires a significant degree of self-examination or analysis rather than just recalling a memory or looking in one's closet or drawer. (And the deeper and more controversial the better!) 

Prefectdt: I have taken part in so many of your and Bonnie's brunches that I cannot remember them all, let alone choose between them, sorry.

I think that the ones I like the most are the ones that I write about least, because they are outside my experiences. These are the ones where I return, usually on the Sunday and then again, for the recap. These are the ones where I want to read what other people have written. This way I can find out more about areas that are lacking in my knowledge range. It's always nice to learn things from those who have been there, seen it, done it.

Barrel: I’m a relative newbie as I’ve only been at the brunch table for about 3 years, so my context is limited compared to others. However, I especially liked Hermione’s request for suggested topics a few months ago and the response was, IMO, broad and rather juicy. I learn from all of you and look forward to more exchanges. But the 35 responses to Bonnie’s question 13 years ago was amazing.

Congrats on a new record every week and thank you for doing this.

Hermione: When Bonnie used to publish her brunch post on Sunday morning, I always got up early, eager to see what it might be. When she switched to late on Saturday, I would creep out of bed, grab my BlackBerry, and check to see if the post was up. Brunches were always the highlight of my week. The topics I like beat are the creative ones, where readers use their imaginations to create a scene or location. Some of those are the International Spanking Museum, the Midsummer Spanking Festival, the spanking Olympics and spanking rooms.

Let's see if I can double my record. See you all next week!

From Hermione's Heart

Sunday, January 2, 2022

Spanko Brunch 2.0 #416

Happy New Year to you all, and welcome to a very special brunch. In 2006, my dear friend and mentor Bonnie started off the new year by hosting the first spanko brunch. Thus started the weekly tradition that continued for years. When Bonnie temporarily retired her blog, she had presided over 415 brunches. I then took over as hostess, and I can modestly say that today, I have surpassed her record. Who knew that between us, we could come up with 830 topics related to spanking?

What is your all-time favourite brunch topic, and why do you like it? 

It might take you a while to refresh your memory of all 830 topics, but when you're ready, leave your response as a comment. I will publish an edited summary of our discussion.

From Hermione's Heart