Saturday, August 1, 2015

Spanko Brunch 2.0 #84

Welcome to another delightful gathering of like-minded friends and acquaintances, where we discuss all things related to spanking. Here in Canada this is a long weekend, and many of the television channels take the opportunity to show marathons of one particular program. Reality shows are as popular as ever, but how often have you stopped to think about what is edited out and doesn't get shown in the final version? Surely there must be a spanking or two involved. And isn't there a person on each program who could really benefit from a little OTK session? This week, I ask you to consider that possibility.

What television program - drama, comedy or reality - would be improved by including spanking? Who really deserves one, and who should be the person to deliver it?

Leave your reply as a comment, and I will publish a summary of our discussion once everyone has had a chance to respond. Have fun with this one and let your imagination soar!

From Hermione's Heart

You Completed the Caption

Sir Wendel: A gentleman only spanks on the bare bottom.

Del Fonte: Can't stand still a moment longer, my legs are killing me. If he wants to get paid, the bloody artist better come up with a decent backdrop, like nubile young women with gorgeous arses.

Simon: Sir Edward had always considered that his rendition of "I'm a little teapot, short and stout, here's my handle here's my spout" was vastly improved when he did the actions. Here we see him doing the handle.

Six of the best: This distinguished gentleman is saying, "I love two things about Dolly Madison. Her ice cream is delicious TOPS, Her BOTTOM is scrumptious when spanked".

Nina: What perfect life for a gentleman like me! A good business deal which left enough money for a fine new hat in one hand, a fine new cane in the other. I wonder how my good wife will like this new cane.

Baxter: Where is that beautiful plump scullery maid? I asked her to meet me out here in the pasture so we could spank each other and f*** our brains out.

ricky: Would you believe, I'm Tom Jones?

Kingspan: A well-disciplined bottom being invaluable to the pursuit of sexual satisfaction, the right of the people to keep and bear canes shall not be infringed.

Leigh: Life is good and I'm one of the very best things about life.

Ronnie: George, please tell Mrs Windsor that I have been waiting 15 minutes for her to join me for our ride and if she doesn't appear in the next five minutes she knows what to expect.

Lilli Clairmont: Why yes, I am rather dapper, thank you for noticing! What you don't know is that I'm feeling rather chipper because I've just reddened the maid's bottom with my cane. Handy thing it is, a cane, an essential tool for any head of a household!

Welcome, Lilli!

Vfrat25000: Yes, I would love to sit down but that prankster Ben Franklin just gave me a huge wedgie and I’m trying to untangle it from my butt crack without looking too obvious!

Nice costume Mr. Trump but you do realize this is not a costume party?
What costume?

I think I have my pants on backwards! I gotta pee something awful and I can’t find my zipper!

Hello my lovely…Would you like to go for a boat ride on the Potomac?
Not a chance George…The last time we did that you blabbed to everybody about the spanking you gave me in the middle of the river, some kind of BS about not being able to tell a lie. You can row your own sorry butt across that river!

Why is Uncle George dressed like Ben Franklin?
I don’t know but he is worth a sh*t load of money so don’t say a word to him about it or I’ll spank you?
OK Got it! Crazy Uncle + 3 % of Coca Cola = A first class ticket to Crazyville with no stops in between!

It appears that Grandpa Charles has as we used to say: “One wheel in the mud!” “He is playing poker with two cards short of a full deck!” “I believe he has jumped the sanity track!”
“He just has one oar in the water!” “He’s one egg shy of a dozen!” “His toast is buttered on both sides!” “His ladder doesn’t go all the way to the top!”
 
Hermione: Does this wig make my ears look big?
From Hermione's Heart

Friday, July 31, 2015

Friday FAIL

Just one FAIL for you today, but it's a doozy!

We all know how popular kitty videos are on the internet. Have you ever taken a picture or a video of your cat, only to be dismayed at the sight of its little butthole showing up so prominently in the finished product? No? Me neither, but it seems that some folks are.

Now there's a product to camouflage that unsightly kitty butt. The Twinkle Tush is an ass-cessory that turns your cat's butt into a glittering jewel.


It's a gag product, meant to be used only for brief periods of picture-taking (thank goodness!)


Here's the full story:




For more silliness, why not Complete the Caption? It's free, and comes with a ten year warranty!
From Hermione's Heart

Thursday, July 30, 2015

Complete the Caption

A portrait of a gentleman lost in thought, contemplating his life, his estate, his favourite hunter, his mistress, his voluptuous parlourmaid, the naughty stable lad....  He's very fortunate indeed.

Complete the caption by leaving a comment, and see all captions in print in an upcoming post.
From Hermione's Heart

Tuesday, July 28, 2015

From the Tope Shelf - A New Friendship

Will Lucy ever get her thesis written with all these spankings going on? I hope so. Meanwhile, Karen and Juliette strike up a friendship that Karen hopes will work to her advantage.


Although she had feigned to be unaffected by her second strapping in the same week, Karen did, in fact, keep herself out of trouble for a while. After Juliette and Joanna had made their unconventional pact of peace, Karen even seemed prepared to offer an olive branch to Juliette.

Although they were kept pretty busy during the week, the girls were allowed to please themselves how they spent their weekends, provided they were not rowdy. Even the dress rules were relaxed, and jeans and T-shirts replaced the traditional uniforms. The Carstairs staff simply made it their business to wander around the place unobtrusively to keep an eye on things.

On her second weekend at the establishment, Juliette decided to enjoy the fine weather on the Saturday afternoon and sat watching a hockey match being played between two rival classes. The game held no interest for her, but there was nothing else to do. Lacking any companionship, Juliette allowed her mind to wander as she gazed at the playing field. She wondered where this chapter in her life was taking her. Her encounter with the judicial strap had been traumatic, but her brief spell at Carstairs had already unlocked a side of her personality that she had not suspected existed. She would never really enjoy being punished, although she recognised that the act of submission did hold some excitement, even for her. What really got to her was how she felt when the other girls were punished and especially the incredible sensations she had felt as she wielded the cane across Joanna's pert bottom, and what had come afterwards. That had really hit the spot in a way she had never previously experienced.

Deep in her own thoughts, Juliette sensed rather than saw another girl approach. Her feelings were too intense to tolerate interruption and she did not look round, hoping the intruder would go away. To her surprise, it was Karen's voice which broke her train of thought.

"Mind if I join you?" The tone seemed friendly enough; in any case there was little Juliette could do to prevent it, so she gestured at the grass beside her. Karen sank down beside her and turned towards the games field. For several minutes there was silence, but Juliette could tell that Karen had something to say.

"You know, you and I are pretty much alike."

"I don't think so." Juliette was not in a very conciliatory mood.

"We are, you know." Karen persisted. "I watched you when you thrashed Joanna and I think I know what makes you tick."

"I don't know what you mean," Juliette protested, a little too quickly for the words to carry conviction.

"Oh come on, Juliette, I watched you. You enjoyed beating her. You can't deny it."

"What if I did? Are you telling me you wouldn't have liked to have been in my place? I think I was entitled to teach her a lesson, after what she did to me."

"Well, maybe I wouldn't have minded putting a few stripes across that pretty little behind. But if it comes to changing places - if you really want to know, it was Joanna I would have traded with."

Now Juliette really was stuck for an answer. "I don't follow," she mumbled, rather lamely.

"Oh, come on, Juliette, don't be so dense. Different strokes for different folks - literally in this case. I told you, I've watched you. You don't much like taking a tanning, but you certainly love dishing it out. With me it's the other way round. I get my jollies when someone gives me a good thrashing, hadn't you guessed? It's just that, for it to work - work for me, I mean - the person dishing it out has to be really strong. Not just physically strong, but in control. I get such a high, knowing I have to submit and take whatever I'm given. So you see, we are alike, in a different sort of way." She stared at Juliette almost defiantly.

"I don't know what to say. Why are you telling me this?"

"I want to be friends, silly. Don't you see? We are complementary."

"You mean you want me to spank you? Eugghh that's vile. I won't! Go away and leave me alone."

"No, no I don't mean that." Karen was really concerned. The last thing she wanted was to frighten Juliette off. "I just want to be friends. You must feel lonely here, I know I do."

"Lonely? You? Why should you be? All the other girls look up to you." Juliette felt a pang of jealousy as she realised the absolute truth of what she had just blurted out.

"That only makes it worse. Most of them are so weak and none of them understand. Surely you can see that?"

Juliette thought for a minute and grudgingly conceded that perhaps Karen did have a point. "Well, what if that's true? What do you expect me to do about it?"

"I just thought it would help to have someone who understood, that's all."

"But I don't understand. You said you enjoyed being beaten. I don't understand that for a start."

"Don't you? Don't you see that how you feel and how I feel are part of the same thing?"

"No." Even as she spoke, Juliette knew that she was being very unfair and perhaps Karen was not so far off the track which her own thoughts had been leading her to, just a few moments before.

"Look, I know you think I was rotten to you when you first arrived. Perhaps I was, although you did deserve it for what you did to Lucy. But will you just trust me? Let me show you something and then perhaps we can talk."

"What do you want me to see?" Juliette was unsure of herself and even less sure of Karen.

"I want you to come and see something; perhaps it will help you to understand. Come on, trust me. It won't do you any harm, I promise." Karen got up and held out a hand to Juliette. "Friends?"

Juliette was only too aware that she could use some friendship to help her over her present unhappy state, and against her better judgement accepted the offered hand. Karen began to lead her to the back of the main building. It was an area that Juliette had not explored and she thought that only the domestic staff ever used it. As they rounded the corner of the building, the view seemed unremarkable. There was an area of gravel forming a square bounded on one side by the kitchen garden, which also partly encroached on the side facing the back entrance to the main house. The rest of the side facing the house was taken up by the rear drive, which twisted back through an area of woodland and dense undergrowth. The far side of the square was taken up by some old brick buildings which must have originally been stables. It was to these buildings, the walls heavily festooned with ivy, that Karen led her.

"These old stables are only used for storage," Karen explained. "Except for the end one, which is the carpenter's shop. Have you met our carpenter?"

"No, why would I?"

"Oh, let's say most of the girls have, at one time or another," Karen said with a grin. "He's not really a carpenter, Mr Parry-Jones. He's just an odd-job man they keep on to do the maintenance around the place, and a spot of gardening. He's a bit of a bad-tempered old goat, though, and the girls like to tease him.

They arrived at the side door of the building Karen had indicated was the carpenter's shop. Trying the door, Karen found that it was not locked. She had not expected that it would be. She opened the door slowly, peering inside to see if there was anyone about. Seeing that the coast was clear, she opened the door wider and went in, motioning Juliette to follow her. Once they were both inside, she shut the door behind them.

The workshop smelt of freshly cut wood, which made Juliette want to sneeze. It was a large room and, as she looked around, Juliette could see all kinds of tools laid out neatly on the benches which lined the walls. In the centre of the room was a large wooden frame which was clearly in the process of being worked on.

"That's what I wanted to show you." Karen pointed at the wooden structure. "Wouldn't you really love to use it?"

"I don't know what it is." Juliette examined the structure. It consisted of a sort of trestle, the top rail of which was heavily padded. Half way down the legs on the side nearest to her, the cross-bar which linked the two legs had been turned on its edge to form a shelf about six inches wide. Extending out towards her from the outer ends of the shelf were two bars, terminating in short leather straps. These two bars projected right through the trestle and stuck out a similar amount on the other side, again terminating in leather straps.

"It's a birching bench, silly! Miss Parkin had had Parry-Jones do it up for this term. It hasn't been used for ages but I think she believes I am going to give her the excuse. I'm not sure even I'm brave enough to take a birching!"

Juliette felt a spark of excitement ignite within. "How does it work?" she couldn't resist enquiring.

"I knew you'd be fascinated," Karen stepped towards the apparatus. "It's called a birching bench but of course it can be used with anything - the cane or the tawse perhaps, but generally, for those, people can stay in position and don't need to be restrained. That's the theory, anyway. With the birch, it's different. It takes longer for one thing; the strokes are counted in dozens not sixes; and even I wouldn't be able to hold still for two dozen of the birch on my bare bottom."

Karen took hold of the top rail and lifted her legs so that she was kneeling on the shelf-like plank. "The idea is that you kneel like this, then your ankles are secured in those straps." She looked over her shoulder and pointed at the straps on the outriggers, which Juliette could see would just come about level with her ankles if she spread her legs.

"Of course, the birch covers a much wider area of your bottom than the cane, each time it strikes. The idea is to hold your legs well spread so the little twigs at the ends can penetrate right into your botty-crack." She laughed, seeing Juliette's horror-stricken features. "Just in case you feel like putting your hands in the way or anything, they are held in front by these straps." She leant forward and grasped the outriggers on the far side of the bench. "Do you think I will look all right when my time comes? Is my bottom big enough and curvy enough?"

She was teasing Juliette now, and Juliette began to wish she had not allowed herself to be persuaded to come. True enough though, Karen did fill out her jeans very nicely; the material was pulled very taut as she mimed the birching position. Juliette could clearly see the line of her panties under the denim and the thought suddenly came to her that she would like nothing better than to bare those plump cheeks, then watch them turn red as she applied a nice whippy cane.

Suddenly there was the sound of gravel crunching outside. "Oh, hell, someone's coming!" Karen's voice was hoarse. "Quick, we must hide. If we get caught in here, we're for it!" She leapt off the frame and dived to the far side of the room.

Juliette did not stop to think that if Karen was so entranced with the idea of being put across the birching block, the best way she could experience it for real was to have stayed where she was and let herself be found by a figure of authority. It didn't in fact occur to her until quite a while later, by which time she was in no position to suggest it.

She looked around frantically for somewhere to conceal herself. Karen dived behind a big rack at the end of the workshop, but the only place Juliette could reach as the door handle began to turn was the work-bench next to the birching frame. She got down on her knees and tried to curl into a small ball, but she knew as she did so that it wouldn't be good enough. To make matters worse, she stumbled as she made her dive for concealment and knocked the leg of the bench heavily enough to dislodge a large squeezy bottle of glue from the work top. The container fell with a squelchy sound and began to ooze glue all over the floor.

The door swung open and a middle-aged man wearing old-fashioned bib-and-braces overalls entered. His eyes instantly alighted on the fallen glue bottle and from there were drawn to the terrified Juliette, who was barely shielded at all by the frame of the bench.

"Come on out, you little wretch, I can see you." His voice was deep and rasping, with no hint of subtlety. As Juliette stood up, she could see that his physique matched the voice. Not very tall, he was, nonetheless, quite broad in the shoulders and he did not look to be carrying an ounce of excess weight. He was wearing a short-sleeved shirt which revealed muscular arms covered with thick dark hair. His hands were raw-boned with veins in the back which stood out like knots. His square jaw was set in an angry frown and Juliette was reminded very much of the ogres she had seen in childhood fairy-tale books.

"Just what the 'ell do you think you're doing in 'ere?" He gave her no time to answer. "What a bloody mess you've made of my workshop. It's nothing short of vandalism, that's what it is. Come along, my girl. You and me are going to see Miss Parkin and I'll make damn sure she tans your arse for this, you see if I don't!"
We know Miss Parkin is a stern disciplinarian, so the girls are in for it now. But what about the birching bench? When will it be used? Stay tuned and you will find out.

If you would like to re-read the entire story, go to this post - From the Top Shelf - scroll down to A Degree of Discipline, and you will see all the posts from the story, in order.
From Hermione's Heart

Monday, July 27, 2015

Recap: Spanko Brunch 2.0 for July 26


This week we discussed our favourite implements, and here's what you said:

Baxter: I will answer for me and for my wife.

For me, I like the bread board paddle we bought at a local cooking stuff store. it is a couple feet long, probably 18 or so inches of that the actual paddle part and is six inches across and 3/4" of an inch thick. I just like the feel on my butt when my wife spanks me with it.

For my wife, she likes the plastic riding crop I bought on Amazon. The whole thing is plastic, nothing to break off or wear out. She likes whipping my butt with it, especially when we are having sex as she likes to say "ride em cowboy" and hits my butt repeatedly.

Nina: Hi Hermione, which implement I like best depends on the situation. We have a round black leather paddle which I love because it can be as intense as I need it. The other one is a rather soft leather flogger with lots of leather ends which feels awesome. They are the ones we used between my last pregnancy and the current one. We have other implements, but these two are my favourites. Wishing you a great weekend.

Downunder Don: I have always liked using the cane but her favorite is an old leather riding crop; both stingy and thuddy at the same time.

ricky: I love the wooden paddle used slowly, discreetly, and compassionately. I just love the thud, the pause, and then its glorious frisson, and another pause to absorb the full benefits of its wake. And then, I will plead, "Please, may I have another?"

Arched one: Actually out of all the implements we have there are two that I love to be spanked with. One is an old belt that delivers a wonderful sting. the second is a leather ridding strop about 3" wide and 1 1/2' long. It's stiff and really sets my bottom on fire.

Jan: Hi Hermione, My favourite is his wide leather belt, although I quite like the pink silicone spatula, decisions...

His favourite is an eighteen inch long wooden ruler :(

Dr. Ken: The vast majority of the time, I spank using just my hand--that is my absolute favorite. On the very rare occasion when I reach for an implement, my favorite is a hairbrush--actually a clothesbrush--that I bough many years ago from Nu-West. Overall, it's about a foot long, with 7" of it being the handle and the other 5" an oval, flat wooden spanking surface. The handle length makes it easier for me to use, and the flat back delivers a good solid wallop. I've gotten some very different and interesting verbal reactions--mostly incoherent, I might add--when I start to apply that to a deserving lady's bottom.

Ronnie: Without a doubt the rose leather paddle.

We've had it for ages. Because it's cuddly and really well made and I love leather and I love the rose on the front and even when it's hurting I can still think of that rose being applied to me--lovingly--and it makes me feel good, if a little sore:)

Roz: My favourite is pretty much anything leather. The leather paddle which can be as light or intense depending on its use and his wide leather belt.

Anon: To put it differently - what sole implement would I choose for the rest of my spanking career ? It must be the palm of my large right hand. Hand spankings can vary from light sexy pats, which hardly pinken her skin to a really hard prolonged one that leaves madam with a very sore bottom indeed. Your hand is always available to be deployed at very short notice, and does not cause comment from non spankers, unlike canes, paddles or tawses, which would, if noticed about the house, and may not be available at short notice. Hand spankings are usually given OTK, a comfortable and intimate position for both parties, and I get added pleasure from my palm contacting her ample smooth bottom. At the end her bottom should be smarting roundly, but she should be able to sit on it after a short while, unlike after a caning, which can cause sitting problems for days !

I like that variation on the question!

Six of the best: Because I chose the 'nom de plume' of 'Six of the Best', naturally it would be a CANE. This pliable swishy corporal punishment implement has always felt good in my hands. And it is a delight when I land it on a naughty female's knickers down bare bottom.

Bogey: Over the last decade we have both slowly come to relish the sting of a particular wooden paddle. I like a few more licks than she does, but she seems to be gaining on me.

Leigh: Pretty much anything leather, but I think the dogging bat would have to be my favorite.

Enzo: Without a doubt my favorite implement is my bare hand. There is nothing comparable to flesh on flesh. I love the contact, the sting and the warmth I feel not only in my own palm but also that radiating from her bare bottom. You don't get that experience, in my opinion, when using actual implements. It makes the biggest "connection" in my experience. That is why my hand is almost always my first choice.

Second would be a leather belt. I usually save this for stricter occasions as it tends to leave marks easily. The belt is also more of an added psychological discipline due to the association I and the young ladies have of it, plus the lecturing that accompanies it.

Loki Darksong: Myself, I am a cane fan. I have always had a fascination with them since I read about them in Victorian erotica decades ago. While I own several, I have found that thin ones have more of a bite than the thicker ones. And they are easier to give those beautiful welts you see in pictures and movies.

For those times when I bottom, a cane is one the few implements that can get a reaction out of me.

Hermione: Like Ronnie, I love the feeling of the leather rose paddle against my bottom. It hurts too much for the first few whacks, then it becomes a lovely, solid reminder of my husband's lone for me.


Thanks, everyone, for your enthusiastic contributions. Have a safe, sane and consensual week!
From Hermione's Heart

Sunday, July 26, 2015

Spanko Brunch 2.0 #83

It's been a busy week, so now it's time for some relaxation and good conversation over brunch. This week's question came to mind as I was hanging up some of the implements that we hadn't used for a while, and had stored away in a drawer.

What is your all-time favourite implement? Please describe it and tell us why you love it so much.

Leave your reply as a comment, and I will publish the results of our discussion when the weekend is over.

From Hermione's Heart