Monday, December 5, 2016

Recap: Spanko Brunch 2.0 for December 4

Our discussion was about the reasons we spank, and how they are perceived by the vanilla population.

Roz: Hi Hermione, this is a great question! I think spanking as part of sexual foreplay would be more tolerable to vanilla's and perhaps discipline in the home the least.

Jack: I am mostly vanilla, so I am answering as if the spanking involved me. I would not feel uncomfortable if a spanking involved others (not me) - even if it was to happen in my presence - or if it was discussed in my presence - so tolerance would not be an issue at all.

I think "sexual foreplay" would be the most tolerable - either giving or taking would be exciting (giving would be my first choice).

"Fantasy / role-play" would be along the same lines to me, so that would also be tolerable.

A "dare between friends" may or may not be tolerable. If the spanking was within someone of the same gender - no go/ not tolerable and not interested. If with a female - it might also be stimulating so could be uncomfortable, (so less but still tolerable perhaps). Maybe tolerable under the right circumstances - like if alcohol was involved.

"Discipline of adults by professionals" would be tolerable - if I desired it and sought out the professional, but for me, not really my cup of tea (and not my glass of beer, either).

"Discipline in the home" would require agreement and consent of course by both the spanker and the submissive. If that was present, I would tolerate it. If no consent - not tolerable. (I would probably prefer the dominant position in a truly disciplinary spanking, as I am not sure that a spanking would cause a change in my behavior). So maybe this is the least tolerable, unless consent was present and negotiations were completed ahead of time.

I am not sure how I would tolerate a "Stress relief" spanking. If it really relieved stress, it would be OK, but I have not attempted it, or even considered it, as I am not sure it would have that effect on me.

Just my two cents.

Thanks for the blog, I really enjoy your work. (By the way, the "Friday fails" are really enjoyable).

Welcome, Jack, and thank you. It's very enlightening to hear from a (mostly) vanilla reader. 

kdpierre: I think it would have to be the dare or penalty for losing a game...or just determined by chance. People tend to honor stakes seriously even if the stakes themselves are not so serious. Daring a person to give or receive birthday spanks for example would probably be looked upon as just some bit of fun.

Vanillas tend to forgive chance or play but get hung up when someone actually wants to be spanked (like for any of the other reasons listed) because in their minds "who in their right mind would want that?"

Yorkie: I can only answer for my wife. She tolerates spanking me because she knows I need it and crave it only for the sexual gratification it gives me. She would outright refuse if it were to be for punishment. So for her, a vanilla, she tolerates fun/ erotic spankings even though it does nothing for her at all.

Leigh: IMHO I think sexual foreplay and fantasy are the topics vanillas would be most comfortable with and spanking by a professional the least comfortable.

A.J. With vanillas?

The first two, hands down (fantasy role-play only if related to sexual foreplay).

pegte: I would imagine sexual foreplay might be a topic vanillas might be comfortable with.
Spanking by a professional I would imagine would be grounds for divorce.

Welcome, pegte!

Ronnie: I would think sexual foreplay and possible dares between friends vanillas would be most comfortable with and spanking by a professional the least comfortable.

anna: If they are truly vanilla, a bit of foreplay a few pats in the behind mind be ok. As to the worst
going to a goodness grounds for divorce!
Not at our home however, I like to keep all options open!

Welcome, anna!

kdpierre: The more answers I am reading the more I think I misinterpreted "tolerate" in the question. I answered thinking you meant how a vanilla might react to spanking outside of their own relationship. Like hearing about someone they knew who got spanked. Most of the other commenters seem to interpret the question from the perspective of a vanilla being approached on including spanking in their own relationship. If that is how you meant it my answer would change to: "it all depends on the person ". Some vanillas might prefer one aspect over another while others would not accept it at all no matter what.

As with all brunches, the question is open to individual interpretation. I cannot think of a time when we have not had at least two different takes on a question. That's part of the fun!

Baxter: My wife enjoys spanking me for the foreplay mostly. However, once in a while, she will really paddle my bottom, if she is not interested in sex, but knows I want a spanking. There is no way I would ever entertain a professional spanker while being married to my wonderful wife of 33 years as that would be akin to having an affair.

Hermione: Spanking by a professional is the type of spanking situation that is most often in the news, so it might be the kind of spanking they are most familiar with, although not necessarily the most comfortable. In my opinion, spanking for discipline in the home would make vanillas most uncomfortable, and spanking on a dare the most understandable.

Thank you all - especially our newest contributors - for participating this week.
From Hermione's Heart

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