Bonnie: Thank you for digging up this favorite topic. It remains an unresolved question for us. I think we recognized together that we are both spankos.
Wendel: I do not remember who brought it up first. Most likely it was me.
Dan: I break the context out into two separate happenings, though the answer to who first brought it up is the same in both cases. The first time, I brought up spanking after seeing a segment on adult spanking on the old HBO series Real Sex. I don't remember a lot about the context, other than I saw that segment, was at least mildly turned on by it, and probably showed it to my wife. Her reaction was relatively positive, and for a short period we did some "funishment" role play. However, she soon became concerned that she was giving me fake punishments, basically as sexual foreplay, for real misbehavior, and that it might just be reinforcing the bad behavior. So, we stopped.
The second time was a few months later, after I discovered The Disciplinary Wives Club website and, through it, the concept of Domestic Discipline. Until than, I really had no clue that adult corporal punishment was "a thing". Unlike the Real Sex segment, which was focused on erotic spanking, something about disciplinary spankings touched something in my core. I told my wife about it, emphasizing that unlike our prior experimentation, this would entail *real* spankings, i.e. severe enough that I would experience them as real punishment and something to be avoided. She reacted positively, and 20+ years later, we're still doing it.
CEM: All of my relationships of this nature started via Internet sites where that topic, or at least fetish in general, was the subject matter so it's not like someone was "caught" off guard or surprised. It was mutually sought after.
Roz: For us it was mutual. We were having a conversation and somehow spanking just came up, I can't remember how. We talked about it and it was quickly clear it was something we were both interested in.
Luvinhub: I'm not really sure. I know we started that direction when one day my wife grabbed me by my balls and said we were going to have a talk and things were going to change. Eventually, from there we moved into a wife led marriage and then into DD.
Jack: Dating an older woman, in her 60's, I was in my 20's. I can't recall what I did but she said I should be given a spanking. I said at my age and laughed it off, but her look and tone of voice changed and I soon said, your kidding. She said she was not and I thought what the heck. I was soon standing before her pants and underpants around my ankles and told to get over her lap. She was not kidding, that spanking hurt, she used her hairbrush and it landed very hard and very fast. When she did stop, I layed across her lap, saying I was sorry. She then stood me up, leave the pants and underpants down and face the corner, NOW. I stood facing the corner for a long time.
Rosco: I raised it. I had a wildly successful experience at the tender age of 13, but had been rebuffed whenever I ventured into the subject for the next ten years and was pretty gun shy.
When Irene and I started dating, I knew pretty quickly she might be the one for me. She was pretty open minded so I got up the nerve to ask. She was surprised, but quickly told me if there was going to be any spanking she would be doing it and I would be on the receiving end.
It still took a little time for her to realize how serious I was, but now 46 years later she’s as into it as I am - maybe more.
Alan: In my marriage it was me that first brought it up. But in a previous long term DD relationship ,it was a former girlfriend who actually dove into it asserting that I had some self-destructive tendencies she could and did address with spanking. My impression is that it is typically the male who brings spanking up. But clearly there are exceptions to that. Also younger women, particularly GEN Z, are a lot savvier about kink in general and probably much more likely to introduce it into a relationship than earlier generations.
Prefectdt: Never had a long term relationship with someone else who is into TTWD. Raised the subject twice, in relationships with vanilla partners. It was not well received either time.
KDPierre: It has always been me who brought it up in several relationships over many years. It was received fairly well, BUT I had a pretty strong inkling that these ladies would be receptive before I ventured down the path, though I was never sure. So it took some nerve each time. But it was worth it.
Ronnie: P's I suppose. It started with playful swats, probably like it does with most couples. Then much later I read some throwaway paperback on holiday, I think a Jackie Collins, in which there was a brief account of a girl getting spanked and I told P about it, I remember him reading the extract and telling me so and saying it seemed to have done her some good. I think that was probably the first time P ever mentioned it, I mean the actual determined act of spanking, and told him I agreed and the rest is history.
Red: I was the one who requested that Cindy spank me, as a way of responding to my dominant nature! It took quite a bit of convincing, and finding the Disciplinary Wives Club site helped make it more real than just her and me. Other people actually did this, and it helped their marriage, and their sex life together. I thought spanking would be sexy, and it was and still is, although the spankings are quite real now. I have now been spanked by Cindy for more than 20 years, and it is still exciting, and solves lots of little problems, reduces my stress, and makes both of us happy. plus sex the next day is amazing!
For new readers, Bonnie and I were two of the first bloggers who wrote about being spanked and being happy that we are spanked, so many years ago. My blog was spankedhubby so many years ago.
Bottoms up
red (aka dwcmike)
Hermione: I had always longed for it, but it was Ron who first initiated it. He is a man of action, not words, so we never discussed it. He simply spanked me one evening during an erotic encounter. We were both amazed at our reactions to it, and we have never looked back.
Slava Ukraini
Glory to Ukraine
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