Slava Ukraini
Glory to Ukraine
Bonnie: Thank you for digging up this favorite topic. It remains an unresolved question for us. I think we recognized together that we are both spankos.
Wendel: I do not remember who brought it up first. Most likely it was me.
Dan: I break the context out into two separate happenings, though the answer to who first brought it up is the same in both cases. The first time, I brought up spanking after seeing a segment on adult spanking on the old HBO series Real Sex. I don't remember a lot about the context, other than I saw that segment, was at least mildly turned on by it, and probably showed it to my wife. Her reaction was relatively positive, and for a short period we did some "funishment" role play. However, she soon became concerned that she was giving me fake punishments, basically as sexual foreplay, for real misbehavior, and that it might just be reinforcing the bad behavior. So, we stopped.
The second time was a few months later, after I discovered The Disciplinary Wives Club website and, through it, the concept of Domestic Discipline. Until than, I really had no clue that adult corporal punishment was "a thing". Unlike the Real Sex segment, which was focused on erotic spanking, something about disciplinary spankings touched something in my core. I told my wife about it, emphasizing that unlike our prior experimentation, this would entail *real* spankings, i.e. severe enough that I would experience them as real punishment and something to be avoided. She reacted positively, and 20+ years later, we're still doing it.
CEM: All of my relationships of this nature started via Internet sites where that topic, or at least fetish in general, was the subject matter so it's not like someone was "caught" off guard or surprised. It was mutually sought after.
Roz: For us it was mutual. We were having a conversation and somehow spanking just came up, I can't remember how. We talked about it and it was quickly clear it was something we were both interested in.
Luvinhub: I'm not really sure. I know we started that direction when one day my wife grabbed me by my balls and said we were going to have a talk and things were going to change. Eventually, from there we moved into a wife led marriage and then into DD.
Jack: Dating an older woman, in her 60's, I was in my 20's. I can't recall what I did but she said I should be given a spanking. I said at my age and laughed it off, but her look and tone of voice changed and I soon said, your kidding. She said she was not and I thought what the heck. I was soon standing before her pants and underpants around my ankles and told to get over her lap. She was not kidding, that spanking hurt, she used her hairbrush and it landed very hard and very fast. When she did stop, I layed across her lap, saying I was sorry. She then stood me up, leave the pants and underpants down and face the corner, NOW. I stood facing the corner for a long time.
Rosco: I raised it. I had a wildly successful experience at the tender age of 13, but had been rebuffed whenever I ventured into the subject for the next ten years and was pretty gun shy.
When Irene and I started dating, I knew pretty quickly she might be the one for me. She was pretty open minded so I got up the nerve to ask. She was surprised, but quickly told me if there was going to be any spanking she would be doing it and I would be on the receiving end.
It still took a little time for her to realize how serious I was, but now 46 years later she’s as into it as I am - maybe more.
Alan: In my marriage it was me that first brought it up. But in a previous long term DD relationship ,it was a former girlfriend who actually dove into it asserting that I had some self-destructive tendencies she could and did address with spanking. My impression is that it is typically the male who brings spanking up. But clearly there are exceptions to that. Also younger women, particularly GEN Z, are a lot savvier about kink in general and probably much more likely to introduce it into a relationship than earlier generations.
Prefectdt: Never had a long term relationship with someone else who is into TTWD. Raised the subject twice, in relationships with vanilla partners. It was not well received either time.
KDPierre: It has always been me who brought it up in several relationships over many years. It was received fairly well, BUT I had a pretty strong inkling that these ladies would be receptive before I ventured down the path, though I was never sure. So it took some nerve each time. But it was worth it.
Ronnie: P's I suppose. It started with playful swats, probably like it does with most couples. Then much later I read some throwaway paperback on holiday, I think a Jackie Collins, in which there was a brief account of a girl getting spanked and I told P about it, I remember him reading the extract and telling me so and saying it seemed to have done her some good. I think that was probably the first time P ever mentioned it, I mean the actual determined act of spanking, and told him I agreed and the rest is history.
Red: I was the one who requested that Cindy spank me, as a way of responding to my dominant nature! It took quite a bit of convincing, and finding the Disciplinary Wives Club site helped make it more real than just her and me. Other people actually did this, and it helped their marriage, and their sex life together. I thought spanking would be sexy, and it was and still is, although the spankings are quite real now. I have now been spanked by Cindy for more than 20 years, and it is still exciting, and solves lots of little problems, reduces my stress, and makes both of us happy. plus sex the next day is amazing!
For new readers, Bonnie and I were two of the first bloggers who wrote about being spanked and being happy that we are spanked, so many years ago. My blog was spankedhubby so many years ago.
Bottoms up
red (aka dwcmike)
Hermione: I had always longed for it, but it was Ron who first initiated it. He is a man of action, not words, so we never discussed it. He simply spanked me one evening during an erotic encounter. We were both amazed at our reactions to it, and we have never looked back.
Slava Ukraini
Glory to Ukraine
Slava Ukraini
Glory to Ukraine
Happy belated Thanksgiving to all my Canadian readers. We do indeed have much to be thankful for.
What is the most recent implement to cross your spanking room's threshold?
Roz: The last implement we purchased was a leather paddle and that was some number of years ago now. It was spur of the moment and we purchased it together.
Bonnie: I had no idea so I asked Randy. He didn’t know either, but thought it might be a leather belt he bought for wearing. Of course it had to be tested in other ways.
Barrel: I last purchased an 18” long by 1/4” delrin cane from Cane-iac. It fits in my roller bag and thus made the trip to the UK this summer. While somewhat quieter than our other canes, it is quite effective, leaves marks and can be administered in intimate areas too.
CEM: Very much a traditionalist, so I stick with basic wood hairbrushes, small wood paddles, canes, a variety of leather straps, riding crops and paddles. For items purchased, I bought quality implements, for items self made, I made them well, so everything lasts for years and years. And when in season, fresh cut green willow switches.
Tom: Rather than an implement, you should ask what materials intended for a new implement I last purchased, and that would be some leather scraps, (from a cut up cushion), that I got at the co-op crafting store. I'm thinking about making a dragon's tail whip. Though why, I'm not sure, I'm old with no play-partner/spanker, so I guess it's just more stuff for the people who they hire to clean out this "senior-living apartment", to leer over after I'm gone.
Jack: My wife/mommy bought a bath brush with a larger head, and she had padding added to the handle. She bought two, one for home and one for travel.
Rosco: Maybe 6 months ago I bought Irene a wooden paddle that I found online. It beautifully crafted and causes quite the sting even when used in moderation - almost too harsh.
Irene has some arthritis in her hands so it’s best to have implements with a round handle. Even so it’s a little hard for her to swing the leather strap that she likes or the leather ping pong paddle hard enough.
I may try a putting a thin layer of leather on the new paddle to lessen its impact a tad.
A.J.: Nothing. Just the always ‘handy’ and ever-present hand. (God, I’m boring.)
Luckily for me when on the receiving end, my girlfriends also prefer the hand.
Both of us. Boring. Happily!
Prefectdt: It was in Spring, this year (April I think) I bought a riding crop, made specifically for BDSM purposes. It was only at the start of the year that I found out the difference between a real riding crop and a BDSM riding crop. The real ones have a stiff (often metal) shaft wrapped in leather. Whereas the BDSM riding crops have a flexible shaft, more forgiving of mis-hits. I have been cropped often, but always with a real crop that I would only like to see in the hands of the highly experienced. The BDSM crop should be easy, even for a beginner or less experienced player to use. I have not had chance to try it out yet. Something to look forward to :)
Dan: I recently bought an implement that was basically three short canes, bundled together with a leather handle. Sort of like a bundle of switches used for birching. I was still recovering from a tailbone injury, and I wanted something that might pack a serious sting while being flexible enough that injuring that area was unlikely.
Wendel: The Misses’s birthday gift to me was this thing called a weighted fire hose paddle. The sting and pain that follows is incredible although I wished I was not as old as I am. My backend hurt all evening and I slept on my stomach with no pants or covers. It is reserved solely for me when she feels a firm spanking is needed.
Loki_Darksong: The last implement I purchased it is a leather 10 hole Prison Strap out of Etsy a couple of years ago.
Unfortunately since the purchase I had not found the time to go to proper testing out. It has great potential but still got to find a time to explore that potential.
Graham: A small, round Lexan paddle with tapered holes. Stings a lot w/o doing much damage.
Hermione: Ron gave me a lovely little red strap that he found on Etsy for my birthday. It's beautiful, but doesn't do much besides make a noise. He was disappointed that his choice wasn't as effective as he had hoped, so the strap is merely a decorative addition to our toy rack.
Slava Ukraini
Glory to Ukraine
Slava Ukraini
Glory to Ukraine
Thank you, Boru, for this great find.
Slava Ukraini
Glory to Ukraine
What does the spanker do that lets you now this spanking is going to be different?
Bonnie: Some Jazz musicians claim they never play a song exactly the same way twice. I think that concept applies to my dear husband Randy’s approach to spanking me.
We celebrated my birthday last week in the traditional fashion (for us). Except it wasn’t. I anticipated an enthusiastic celebratory OTK paddling with lots of banter, probably up in the bedroom. That would have been perfectly wonderful and totally appropriate for the occasion.
But no. I ended up down in our basement, cuffed to our spanking bench naked for a caning. Yeow! Fortunately, he didn’t go into full punishment mode, but I definitely felt every year. He had candles burning down there for illumination. I didn’t count them. He proceeded slowly and silently as might befit a more somber ceremony. I was intrigued by the change of pace, quite literally, and loved the excellent set of marks he gifted me.
I’m impressed he’s still coming up with new birthday spanking ideas after all these years. Ceaseless variety makes things interesting, exciting, and fun.
Having said all that, I told him afterward that it’s about time to stow the bench for the winter. It’s cold down there!
A.J.: How about same room same position. With a candle for each year. After each stroke a candle is lit/extinguished (your choice!)
(Imagine going into that room and seeing all those candles! There's some mind-fucking!
Bonnie: I’ve come to expect there will be surprises, but my Prince Charming still invents spanking scenarios that I don’t anticipate. After the session, he sometimes asks how I liked my spanking. This is the about only input I get to his planning process. At that point, however, my mind is typically scrambled to point where my clever response is something like, “My butt hurts.”
If he chose the incremental candle approach you describe, I’d be fine with it.
Wendel: Normally during a hike in the mountains just the pants come down for spankings. To spice things up the Misses will strip naked for her spanking. The spanking and sex that follows after is quite erotic knowing that someone could come along and spot us.
A.J.: This was my suggested question. An earlier topic had to do with noise-cancelling headsets that led me to ask about things you hear but do not see. I call it "mind-fucking," but "gaslighting," in the good sense also works; the subtle toying with your partner's thoughts for the pure joy it creates.
So, no sound, sound, now visual. You come to the place of judgement and see her/him* do something that immediately get the neurons firing across the synapses. Something that lets you know, 'This time it's going to be different.'
And by 'different' I don't mean threatening. But you're on alert. My pick.
She is seated in that uncomfortable, armless chair that you know so well, kept only because it has one special purpose. You are standing close to her. Her short skirt is pulled back (No! Further back...!!) exposing the lap of justice, a hairbrush/paddle/strap resting on her right thigh...
Your heart beat increases...
Her (calm but decisively): "Get those pants off!"
And at the same moment - She starts to tie her hair up.
And that's my visual! She ties her hair up!
I have learned/noticed over the years - that when a woman ties her hair up, things are about to get serious! And it's for the most common things; play tennis, repaint the living room, the dreaded spring cleaning, wash the car. "It's a job, it has to get done, and I'm going to do it."
And that simple act thrills and excites you. And warns you! There may be a bit "extra" in this one. Good or bad, but it's there.
The fun one: She smiles so sweetly at you when she does this.
The less fun one: There is no smile, her lips are gently pursed like an impatient woman waiting for you to get moving, and she's staring at you, eye-to-eye, as you do as you are told.
The even worse "Oh, shit!" one: There is no smile, her lips are tightly pursed, and she's staring at you, eye-to-eye and not blinking, as you do as you are told. This is where you consider your past life choices.
Even though I don't give/get really hard spankings, there have been times when a bit more than expected was delivered. Something where the eyes opened a bit wider. A "Pink-plus" tush when it is over. But that's about it.
* I don't know what the male equivalent is of tying up the hair. (Rolling up shirt-sleeves?) You?
Prefectdt: I think that this topic is for those with long term spanking partners, so I will opt out this time. Looking forward to reading everyone else's replies, though.
Rosco: I can get a clue by how she’s dressed. Irene likes to dress up for our “dates”, and sometimes changes once or twice during the two hours or so from start to finish. Irene doesn’t have a huge wardrobe, but she’s creative.
She’s done the schoolmarm thing recently a few times, but also can be a cheerleader, a senorita, and any number of other personas. Hairdo, lipstick as well as clothes, and she has a lot of fun with accents as she delivers the obligatory naughty boy lecture as she intermittently thrashes me.
Tom: After some funishment in the bedroom, I was herded naked to the living room, (with one driving smack from the paddle just as I passed in view of the house next door from the kitchen window). She sat on a low ottoman bench, and pulled me over for a fast and furious 30 swat volley, then she dropped the paddle for an endless set of hand delivered spanks, deftly avoiding my one hand's attempt to shield my bottom. That 'driving smack' should have been my clue, she was genuinely mad at me. It became so painful I actually asked her to stop. In retrospect, I wish I had offered her the choice of stopping, or pinning me down and redoubling her spanking.
Robert: Not long ago I thought I would just be getting a maintenance spanking, but as she had me bend over the couch and pulled my panties down she said that I had been a little lax in some of my chores. I hadn't done the laundry yet and only vacuumed downstairs, for example, so this would be between a punishment spanking and a maintenance one.
She used her paddle first, which is normal, but after about 15 swats, she surprised me by bringing out her hairbrush, which I hadn't seen yet. I then got a dozen or so with that and then I was sent off to the corner for 10 minutes.
Believe me that I made sure to get my chores done more quickly after that!
Roz: Back in the day we would sometimes incorporate light restraints or blindfold. The biggest clue of a spicier spanking is generally the implements or accessories gathered beforehand.
Hermione: When I am bent over the end of the bed, if Ron lifts my shirt out of the way to broaden the target area, I know I am in for a serious spanking.
Slava Ukraini
Glory to Ukraine
Welcome, one and all, to our first spanko brunch for October. Our good friend A.J. has devised yet another intriguing topic, so let's get the discussion going right here, right now!
What single thing does he/she do - right in front of you - prior to a spanking that tells you, "Something has changed. Something is going to be different. This one is going to have a little spice to it. Be a bit more memorable"?
Leave your response as a comment, and once everyone has had a chance to contribute, I will publish a summary of our discussion.
Slava Ukraini
Glory to Ukraine
Our good friend Boru alerted me to this amazing product. It's "a fast-absorbing body cream designed to visibly firm, tighten and deeply hydrate the skin" and I assume it is especially made to target the skin of the bottom.
Have you tried it, or would you? If so, I want to hear about your experience with it. It's available from the Sol de Janeiro website, or from Sephora.
Slava Ukraini
Glory to Ukraine
This week we discussed pain tolerance.
Bonnie: I’d say my pain tolerance is probably medium overall, but well above average when it comes to spankings. When I’m in that zone, the pain doesn’t register the same. It’s a familiar sensation and one I embrace and accept.
Dan: I'm kind of the opposite of Bonnie. I have always had a very high overall pain tolerance. When it comes to spanking, however, I'm just average. Especially if I haven't been spanked in a while, I'm often astonished at how much it hurts.
Rosco: I really don’t know how I compare to others. I’ve seen some brutal stuff online and some wimpy ass stuff as well. I can’t imagine getting it with a bath brush. On the other hand some floggers are a joke.
I’m surprised I’ve never bruised much given how hard Irene whacks me. Sometimes it hurts like crazy, that’s it’s too hard but it only lasts a few seconds.
I’ve only asked Irene to stop once. We’d bought a carpet beater that felt like iron. Usually I just suck it up and assume she can tell from my reaction if it’s getting a bit much.
I feel like I can take a lot and enjoy the prolonged intensity, but the next day or two will carry quite the reminder.
Anon: I don't do pain. When on either side of the lap. I have delivered a "punishment" type spanking exactly once and I had to be pleaded with to so.
"Spank me harder?" Sure. If she asks for it, but it's never harsh.
Just me...
Prefectdt: I do not really judge my pain threshold, for non-spanking events. Stubbed toe, bitten tongue, burnt hand they all just annoy me so much. It all seems so unfair. All of that type of pain is so non-consensual, and that is just not on.
Barrel: Generally, I have a high tolerance for pain. However after an extended period of no spanking, we tried a caning session this week. I had to tap out after the 6 or so strokes. While three were misses that resulted in wrap arounds, I just couldn't take it. I think we are both out of practice and my tolerance level is definitely diminished. So, I apologized for not being able to take it as I handed her the plastic paddle the next day, which she applied. I will hand her the hairbrush when I get out of the shower as a continuing step to build my tolerance. I want to get back to where we were and I can take what she wants to give me.
Roz: I would say I have a medium threshold for pain. The pain from a spanking is definitely more welcome than any other kind of pain.
Ronnie: Medium tolerance for pain, but like Roz, the pain from a spanking is different which I welcome.
Hermione: I have a pretty high tolerance for pain of any kind. I was encouraged as a small child to be stoic about pain, to endure it and not complain. So that extends to both spanking and non-spanking pain.
Slava Ukraini
Glory to Ukraine
Slava Ukraini
Glory to Ukraine
What special sounds enhance a spanking?
Barrel: The unmistakable “whurp” when my wife whips the cane through the air before applying it to my backside. That sound heightens the apprehension I have, knowing what is about to take place.
Robert: I'm sure I'm not alone, but she has one paddle which makes a VERY loud *whack* when appropriately applied to my bare bottom. The pain with the sound reminds me what the next few minutes will be like before I get to head into the corner for a few minutes.
Roz: The sound (and sight) of implements being retrieved. Opening of the drawer, wardrobe etc. Plus the sound of the implement before making contact eg, the whoosh of a belt. Not to mention the sound as it lands.
Bonnie: There are several such sounds: a leather belt slipping through belt loops, a paddle slapped against a hand, Velcro restraint cuffs being opened, an alarm on his phone that tells us it’s that special time again, a snap of the elastic of the waistband of my thong, the drop of a brush on the nightstand, the swish of a crop, when he carefully enunciates the word “Spanking” as he explains what is about to happen to me, and my own rapid breathing as the action warms up.
CEM: Whore Moans. (Hormones.) 😁 The sound of her desire, lust, urgency, passion, distress, desire, wanting it to end, wanting more, hating it, loving it, just the sound of her breathing and utterances...that. I know that was not really the question, but...that's my offering/submission to the topic. 😊
Rosco: For me (us really) spankings wouldn’t be the same at all without the lecture. Not having the whacking sounds would be odd.
Wendel: I love that ½ second of silence right before the wonderful sound of the whack from the paddle or belt. The Misses crying out, sometimes in tears, is also a great addition to the spankings.
Jack: My wife/Mommy pats the bath brush against her hand as she scolds me. She reminds me this is just the light sound. I will be standing there either naked or pants and underpants around my ankle. When it does land on my bare bottom it makes a loud sound and I make a loud sound also, which can be clearly heard when being spanked in the bedroom.
A.J.: Oooh!!! My question!
I don't give/get hard spankings. It's all sensual fun. But it is essential to mess with her mind!*
Without saying a word I lead her to a familiar place - the plush arm of the sofa. She knows what's coming.
Over the arm she goes. No words are spoken. Her mind racing because - she knows! A skirt flipped up. Panties sensuously pulled down and off. Legs parted.
You stand near her as she clutches a small pillow; not looking at you. And then she hears it - the sound of the belt being undone. The deliberate jingle of the belt buckle is heard. The slow, sensuous snake-like slithering hissss of a belt passing through belt loops. You can almost see her tush react.
She sees none of this. She's not looking. It all playing out so beautifully in her mind. The anticipation of what's to come. And it's powerful. The sound alone sets what's to come. And that's one of the sounds I most love.
Coincident with that moment:
- Hearing that little 'gasp' as she takes in that little bit of air as her panties come off. (That's for me! Ladies - want to fuck with my mind? Make that little sound.)
- The soft 'slap!' sound of leather meeting bottom. I don't spank hard, so this is no more than hand meeting bottom. But I want to create the sound of that slap so she thinks it is more than it is. Just to fuck with her mind!
In reality, I'm not sure I ever created that sound; probably from lack of practice. I think it requires a leather that is not a belt. Suggestions?
* This is an equal opportunity zone. It's also effective when the bottoms over that sofa arm are switched. No judgement here! Whoo-Hoo!
Roz said "The sound of implements being retrieved. Opening of the drawer, wardrobe etc."
YES! That!
And why hadn't I thought of that?
Putting her in position over the arm of the sofa, bare-bottom up - and then walk away! And she hears that rummaging sound. Worse - his footsteps back!
What a wonderful mind-fucking! At this point the actual spanking is anticlimactic. It bothers me a bit that I had not thought of this; (probably because I don't have an implements drawer.)
Anon: Sounds are very much a part of it. The "whoosh" of the cane to the "whack" of the paddle. All part of the excitement.
Prefectdt: It looks like I am with the majority here. It is the sounds during play that trigger the mind fairies. The swish of a cane coming in, that loud THWAP! sound as a slipper/plimsoll lands. The sounds of her shoes on a hard floor, as she walks around, out of my sight. Is she getting another toy? Is she just taking a look at her handywork? Is she going to take a run-up this time?
Hermione: The click of his glasses as he puts them on the dresser, knowing that he means to get down to business. The swish of the wooden shoehorn through the air before it lands.
Slava Ukraini
Glory to Ukraine
Slava Ukraini
Glory to Ukraine
Panties and spanking go together like... Here's what you said.
Bonnie: For my husband, Randy, spanking and panties are tightly intertwined interests. He loves to order new panties for me in every style, pattern, material, and color. I think I might own more now than I will ever wear. But still they roll in.
Thongs and cheeky styles that provide minimal coverage around back are his favorites. He says he loves how the fabric frames my target. But he’s not beyond an occasional change of pace. One fun kinky scenario involves caning me while I am wearing high-waisted white nylon full briefs.
Upon the arrival of each new shipment, he asks me to model for him. After my private runway performance, he “tests” my new panties by bouncing a paddle off the round parts they don’t cover. His test feels exactly like a spanking from my perspective, but who am I to argue with science?
Roz: Panties do play a role in spanking for us. Rick enjoys the view and tracing the outline. Then there is the moment they come down or off. So intimate and sensual.
KDPierre: Panties have been an occasional add-on over the years. We use them to enhance certain moods for a spanking, and since they are thong-backed, to act as a frilly frame for any post-spanking color. One thing that has gotten much easier, is being able to find and procure "pouch panties". Hell, we have gotten most of ours off of eBay. Easy-peasy.
Jean Marie: I have strong feelings about panties. I love lingerie but not to wear in bed where they could be ruined; I save them for under slinky sexy gowns. (Agent Provocateur is my favorite brand.) I love plain white cotton panties with full coverage across the seat; I buy packages of cheap ones in bulk. I like to have these ripped right off me, before spanking, before sex. I do not like thongs! I floss my teeth not my ass crack. That is my two cents' worth.
A.J.: "Do panties play a part in your spanking activities?"
Can't answer. I have never worn panties.
Oh! You mean HER!
I have read stories where she has to stand before the 'Lap of Justice™" and told to remove her panties before going OTK. Supposedly humiliating for her.
Not me.
I want her OTK with her panties still on (and maybe that's all she has on) for a minute or two as I get reacquainted with the target, and telling her what's about to come.
I TAKE HER PANTIES down! (Or off.) And I'm with Roz.
My favorite moment - hearing her suck in a little bit air as the gusset of her panties, reluctantly, springs free from her most personal parts. Her last bit of modesty gone, she's vulnerable. "It" is about to start. That little gasp from her - such sweet surrender. The baring of the bottom is the best moment.
Wendel: The Misses looks awesome wearing panties but they always come down for a spanking. It is quite a turn on watching her bottom being exposed.
Prefectdt: I have never worn panties :) I do like being spanked through the layers until it becomes a bare bottom spanking. That includes over the tight boxer shorts that I prefer. I nearly always wear a boy thong during a beating, as, most interactions that I take part in are non-sexual, and it is very often appreciated that my boy bits are not on display whilst the posterior can still be bare.
Barrel: Occasionally my wife makes me wear panties before a session. But they always come off before the thrashing begins. I do wear a protective cup fashioned like a skimpy thong to define the upper limit of the target and protect my parts from an errant lash of the single tail whip.
Rosco: I am obsessed with panties and spanking both, but I’m the spankee and Irene the spanker wears the panties. (Ok I wear them sometimes)
I definitely appreciate my spankings most when Irene wears a skirt or dress with panties. Decades ago, she allowed me to select her panties. It’s weird to admit, but cotton is a bit of a turn off for me. I’ve got many brands for Irene, but mostly I go back to Olga 913. I love to play with her nether parts though panties before they’re removed for serious action.
I think the allure comes from peeking up skirts in the 7th grade in 1967-68 when skirts were super short. There’s a certain naughtiness on my part. If she’s wearing a skirts without panties that’d be naughtiness on her part which is not part of our role play.
To add a little more, I love to see pictures of female female spanking. I like the idea of a female top and I’d rather see that red round often plump female bottom. A spanking over pretty panties with a raised skirt has a sort of realism for me. I love it when the panties are a bit flimsy - not too small but they might get pulled up into the bottom crack a bit.
It’s common to see someone spanked over panties then having them pulled down then spanked some more. That’s fine, but I also like it if the panties stay up. If there’s frontal nudity one of my turnoffs is shaved public hair.
And since the US Open just ended, I’ve had fantasies about locker room spankings in tennis dresses involving both stars of today and yesteryear.
Loki_Darksong: When it comes to spanking scenes, panties are a pleasant part of the package.
Not all spankings, whether that is a hand spanking or implements such as a strap or belt, a paddle, or a cane, have to be bare bottom to be effective. Granted there is a slight difficulty in regards to measuring the severity of the spanking if it's done over pansies. But all the more reason to be careful when doing so.
Of course there's also the artistic view of a woman's backside while receiving a spanking over panties due to all the various styles available to panties ranging from bikini to high cut to boy shorts to briefs as well as thongs and g-strings. And of course not to leave out the period piece ones such as the Victorian and Edwardian era bloomers.
Even to this day I find those very attractive on a woman. I have a few on the shopping list for my wife at present!
Hermione: I am not allowed to have any protective covering on my bottom before or during a spanking. Ron wants my bottom bare and ready for his attention.
Slava Ukraini
Glory to Ukraine
Slava Ukraini
Glory to Ukraine
AI Said What?
New fiction by Bonnie
Saturday was date night at home for Cindy and George. It was almost dinner time. George reclined in the living room watching YouTube videos on his tablet. His girlfriend, Cindy, was in the kitchen putting the finishing touches on her special chicken paprikash. The distinctive aroma of dinner filled the small bungalow. Everyone knows about the Hungarian paprika, but the right onions, she told him, are just as important.
“It’s chicken,” Cindy announced with a mixture of pride and insistence. “OK, I’m coming,” George replied, eager to enjoy another of her culinary specialties. The chicken arrived at the table atop nokedli, Hungarian noodles, and topped with a classic creamy paprikash sauce. The accompaniment was parsley potatoes. Cindy briefly considered adding red cabbage to the menu, but she wasn’t sure he’d like it.
“This is amazing,” George observed, as he made quick work of the savory Magyar feast. Cindy was more inclined to savor the meal she carefully prepared. She made certain there would be plenty of leftovers to enjoy later.
As George cleaned up in the kitchen after dinner, as is their agreement, Cindy moved to the living room and scouted the streaming services for an appropriate movie.
“I love your paprikash,” George declared as he entered the room with arms wide to demonstrate his enthusiasm. “And I love you too, my sweet chef!” Cindy beamed with satisfaction over her meal’s success. He sat next to her on the couch as she scrolled through the films.
“George?” Her rising pitch suggested a meaningful question was coming.
“Yes…?”
“I asked AI whether you should spank me. He wanted to know whether I had done anything naughty to deserve a spanking. I replied that I hadn’t, but I really like spankings and we hadn’t done that in a long time.”
“You asked AI? Really?” George didn’t expect that.
“Yeah. I wanted a second opinion.” Cindy was defensive now.
“But you didn’t just ask me? What did it say?”
Cindy struggled to conceal a blush. “He said you should definitely spank me as soon as possible.”
“Well OK, that’s some AI advice I’m willing to take,” George replied, now chuckling. “Do you know where that hairbrush is?”
Cindy knew exactly which hairbrush he meant. “Yes, I‘ll go get it.”
George positioned himself in the center of the couch in preparation for all that would surely follow. He turned on the lamp behind the couch to illuminate the proceedings. When Cindy returned, George couldn’t help but notice how lovely she looked in her blue and white flowered dress. He hadn’t really noticed before, maybe because of her apron, but she dressed up for him and this dinner date.
“Have I told you that you are beautiful?”
“Yes, but thank you. Here’s that brush.”
George thought the speed with which she blew past his sincere compliment suggested she wanted to get right down to business. And that business was spanking. Setting the wooden brush beside him, George gestured for his lover to take her position across his lap. As George gently guided her shapely torso into place, he recalled that it had indeed been a while since he spanked his girlfriend. There wasn’t any good reason why they stopped. Their lives just got busy. But now they could start making up for lost spankings.
Cindy was thrilled to finally feel the spanking she had clandestinely craved. Why, she wondered, hadn’t she mentioned it earlier? Why did she have to blame AI? She knew now he would have said yes, and happily. Next time, she won’t keep quiet so long.
Cindy uttered an almost imperceptible gasp as George gently unwrapped his gift. But George heard it. Beneath her pretty dress, he stopped to caress her aqua and white striped bikini panties before exposing her twin alabaster globes. These gorgeous curves demanded attention and George made certain to pay tribute through a series of light traces that made Cindy shiver. Incredibly soft and smooth he noted.
But soon, the time had come for the evening’s highlight, or at least one of them. Rubbing gave way to tapping and tapping to slapping. Before long, George was spanking in earnest. Cindy drank in the rising sensuality of his steadily striking palm.
Next came the brush. George knew his partner hadn’t been spanked for months and wouldn’t be acclimated to this harsh implement. But he also knew Cindy. She wouldn’t be satisfied with half a spanking. He started slow but firm and gradually stepped up the pace, reading her body and breathing for signs of distress. Her growling moans soon suggested quite the opposite reaction. Even so, George stopped after a short while to limit the damage that was by then quite evident along the lower slopes of her punished cheeks.
Cindy practically jumped from his lap and into his arms. They embraced as Cindy landed a passionate French kiss. George momentarily hoped he didn’t taste like paprika and onion. Too late. His next thought was “Wow!” They had unleashed a torrent of lustful zeal. Hands roamed and clothing fell. Each found the other quite ready for next stage. Their mutual desire was too urgent to delay so the carnal celebration continued unabated on the living room couch.
As the couple embraced afterward, Cindy shared how much she appreciated her spanking. “The sting was just so energizing, so, so exciting.” George too appreciated their date night at home. Spanking Cindy was splendid fun. So was everything else.
“Are you still sore?” George knew the answer but wanted to hear her say it.
“Oh hell yes! I’ll be feeling that hairbrush for a while. But I don’t regret it in the least. Thank you, my love. I needed this.”
“Let’s make sure we keep that brush somewhere we can easily find it. By the way… Did you really ask AI about a spanking?”
Cindy’s halting response gave her away. “Um, I. Ah. You know I kinda did, but those chatbots are programmed to not talk about fun adult stuff. So I did ask. But I, uh, made up the answer I wanted to hear.”
A knowing smile crossed George’s face. “So you might need another spanking for lying about the AI?”
“Yes, I guess I do, but maybe not tonight.”
Slava Ukraini
Glory to Ukraine
What would you like to learn about spanking? What can you teach others?
Bonnie: I like to learn through direct hands-on experience. In fact, I’m still learning.
Jack: Resisting, talking back, is not a good idea.
Rosco: Well, I had a
few girlfriends here and there, but I never really felt comfortable
being intimate until I started a relationship with Irene when I was 24.
Discussing spanking, then engaging in it, happened pretty organically at
the time.
I wish I’d understood myself better and was able to communicate with girls when I was much younger.
On
the other hand, I remember leaving a small New Year’s Eve party when
all my old friends had partners and I was single - they’ve all been
divorced now and we’re going strong.
Roz: Always learning:) perhaps one lesson perhaps would be the important of aim and avoiding wrapping.
Red: I agree with Roz of the importance of aim and not wrapping. Wrapping with a long tawse hits the bone on the side of your body that has no padding, and not concentrating when spanking can have the end of a bath brush strike like a 2 by 4.
A.J.: What would you like to learn about spanking?
Nothing. Comfortable with what I know.
Is there something about spanking that you have learned the hard way, that you could teach others?
No. Not really. And not sure I would want to teach anyone anything re: spanking. Kinda' intimate to me.
Prefectdt: What would you like to learn about spanking?
I would like to know what is in it
for the people who like to be the spanker. I do switch myself, although I
would not describe myself as a switch, for me being a spanker is just a
technical exercise in getting the spankee to the place they want to be
in, but it is no great thrill for me. Even when I see an attractive butt
under my lash, I am more concerned about what I am doing to that rear
end than I am about how pretty it is. When receiving I can get a high
that no external drugs could match, but cannot see what the spanker is
getting out of it. It would be nice to find out what is in it for them.
Is
there something about spanking that you have learned the hard way, that
you could teach others?
Yes lots. Horticulturally I am a trained and experienced adult instructor and the skills learned from that have translated well to spanking scenarios. This has been useful when playing with inexperienced spankers.
Wendel: I think we know enough to keep enjoying spanking. Always nice to read about other’s experiences.
Hermione: I have learned a lot by watching spanking videos, especially what NOT to do. Videos are a lot of fun to watch and might help convince a reluctant partner to give it a try.
Slava Ukraini
Glory to Ukraine
Slava Ukraini
Glory to Ukraine
From this brunch ten years ago, the options picked by my readers for most and least comfortable were:
Let's see how we fared this year.
Bonnie: I don’t think non-spankos will be comfortable with any of these permutations, except perhaps in a hanky spanky bedroom context. Accordingly, I think their spanko preferences, if they have any, will parallel their sexual preferences.
Spanky53: My experience is that Male Spanker/Female Spankee and and Female Spanker/Female Spankee are a tie. The hardest for Non-Spankos to accept is Male Spanker/Male Spankee. That being said my experience also has been that Spankos have a harder time accepting Male Spanker/ Male Spankee than Non-Spankos.
Graham: I have zero interest in M/M though I certainly don't mind if others are into it -- none of my business as long as it's consensual. I can't possibly know, but I suspect that most non-spankers would find M/M most difficult to understand. But, as noted above, they likely identify most easily with their own orientation.
Dan: I think Female Spanker/Male Spankee has a lot of negative connotations for some, including that the male in that situation is unmanly. Others have said, in response to your question, that Male/Male may be the hardest for some to understand or accept. I'm not sure that's true. I think they may not themselves gravitate to it, but that doesn't mean they can't understand it. There is a Male/Male spanking group I follow on Reddit and, honestly, I think there are more posts on it that I find similar to my DD spanking lifestyle than is the case with the other DD spanking groups, which are predominantly F/m. I've also found that those latter groups tend to be pretty uninviting to those of us in Female/male dynamics.
CEM: I think the majority of people would find M/f the most "normal" due to societal standards of males being dominant. But most people would probably find F/f the least "threatening" due to the presumption that it was a kink, fetish, two lesbians or whatever, but with the so called "patriarchal" aspect removed, and women being physically less strong, less potentially "abusive" and those other misguided notions.
Roz: I'm not sure on this one but as noted above I'm not sure non-spankos would be comfortable with any of the above but may perhaps be able to understand their own orientation a little more. As also commented above I think perhaps M/M may be the most difficult.
Rosco: I’d guess
people in my group would be more comfortable with fm than mf, since it’s
less likely to be associated with abuse, and it’s fun!
Like many men, I don’t like much to think about what gay men do.
I love to
look at pictures of women spanking. Best if they’re wearing a nice dress
or sometimes lingerie. Ok if they’re angry or whimsical.
I’m
mixed about seeing the victim. If it’s male it could be me. But I love
to look at a round plump female bottom, sometimes still wearing panties.
Even
though I might have been a spanker if my wife was willing, I don’t
generally like to look at men doing the spanking. It makes me think of
abuse. My mind knows it’s not, but I still tend not to look.
Prefectdt: I have to admit to having only limited experience of explaining TTWD to non-spankos. I agree with Graham above, though. Talking to them about F/m play does avoid a lot of preconceptions, that they might have about partnership abuse and manipulative behaviour. Giving us a chance to distinguish ourselves as consenting players, not to be grouped with abusers. In my limited experience, the hardest thing about to non-spankos is overcoming the misconceptions that they already have, ranging from spankos being abusers or victims of abusers to they gave/received a light patty cake spanking, as part of foreplay once. Making them think that they know all about it already.
Red: Very
difficult to say what non spankos think, as we have never talked to
anyone about spanking who is not into the idea of spanking. Many would
think it abusive, I imagine.
Maybe we should all be saying that we
do not find spanking in any way abusive, and just as I am happy in a F/M
situation, I know Ron and you are happy in a M/F relationship.
Meeting
friends who are in the opposite spanking (M/F) situation might even
have the man being reluctant to meet because of what he thinks the new
couple are actually thinking.
We do not find spanking to be in any way abusive, but actually enhancing our love for each other.
Cindy
has occasionally said she was wrong and should be spanked, and I have
agreed by bending down and planting a firm kiss on each cheek, with the
firm reminder that if the behavior was worse, it would be on her bare
bottom. We both laugh afterwards, and the problem is solved. Every
couple might try this just to have a laugh. Just do not tell your
partner what you are going to do when saying you should be spanked for
this.
KDPierre: I don't think it's possible to answer this question for "non-spankos" since they are as diverse a group in their thinking as spankos and therefore would lean in different directions depending on a lot of factors. Personally, however, as a spanko who has come out to plenty of non-spankos, I have found that me being a sub male who GETS spanked rather than doing the spanking, has amused and resonated more than if I came out and said that I spank my wife. My wife also has gotten more "you go, girl!" responses from non-spanko women that seem to support this trend as well. But our experience is skewed by the type of people we are comfortable coming out to. It is definitely not a random group where I would expect the responses might well be quite different.
Wolfman7446: male spanker female spankee - feminine, soft, and lovely.
Hermione: As others have said, it's hard to see things from the non-spanko's point of view. But I think, since the advent of the Sixty Shades books, most non-spankos would be most comfortable with M/F.
Slava Ukraini
Glory to Ukraine
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