I hope all my American readers had a fine Thanksgiving celebration. I've been gifted with some leftovers, so help yourself.
Today I invite you to think back to one particular spanking.
Tell us about your most memorable spanking. good or bad, success or failure.
Please leave your response as a comment, and once everyone has had a chance to speak, I will publish a summary of your responses.
Slava Ukraini
Glory to Ukraine
This song by Paul Jones really got my imagination going. Can't you just picture this angelic-looking chap over someone's knee?
Slava Ukraini
Glory to Ukraine
How do you feel about going to a professional to learn proper caning technique?
Bonnie: We've always explored new spanking techniques and new implements together. I trust Randy to proceed slowly until we are both comfortable, or stop if necessary. I know he won't inflict any severe physical or emotional damage.
Dan: I would. I have a fascination with caning, but for some reason, it's just never worked well with Anne wielding the cane. We've tried several times, including after she's read various "how to" resources. It just doesn't hurt very much, and it's clearly never going to be an instrument she has any enthusiasm for. But, I do have enough curiosity about how a truly effective caning would feel, I would be very open to experiencing it with a pro. And, that's really the only context I can think of in which I would have any interest in going to a pro. In other scenarios, it has no appeal.
Wendel: We would not seek out a Pro. Spankings are for us by us. If the Misses wants to experience it I would give it a go but it is not an implement we have much interest in.
Graham: I think that with practice and patience, anyone who can use a paddle or strap can also learn to use the cane. The question of wanting to is different. As a switch that mostly bottoms, I often visited pros in my younger life and all of them were very skilled.
Rosco: If Irene wanted to escort me, I probably would. It’s intriguing, but I’d worry about injury at least a little.
But I’d rather be tested with prolonged and repeated spankings.
Mija: Under those circumstances I'd take *us* to a pro. I've known a number of people who've gone to pros with their partner to be taught/learn safe ways to use specific implements or rope or whatever. If there was something my partner wanted to experience and, after trying and getting instruction I wasn't able, a pro would be a great option. Especially if I got to watch.
Barrel: Yes, I would if she asked for that support. Why not? If it is something between us that we both want, it makes sense. But we seem to do rather well anyway.
FL: Spanking for me is 100% sexual and part of a trusting, loving relationship. I would not want to involve a third party, any more than I would want one involved for any other sexual act one of us might not wish to participate in. Respecting each others' hard limits is crucial, in any aspect of the relationship.
Prefectdt: Finding someone more competent than myself, for spanko style caning (as opposed to more mainstream BDSM cane use), would mean travelling. Probably to the UK, but at least as far as the Netherlands. But I would be up for a weekend away for that. Also, I would be interested if a play partner wanted to see me caned. Having a consenting audience is a bit of a fantasy of mine. In both cases, though, the idea of doing this would have to be suggested by the other party involved. I would not propose doing either, for fear of feeling that I am pressuring someone into doing something that they might not really want to do.
Roz: I don't think we would seek a professional. Spanking is between and for us.
Hermione: In theory, it would be very interesting to have instruction from a pro. In reality, neither of us would be comfortable in such a situation. Caning doesn't hold much of an attraction for us.
Slava Ukraini
Glory to Ukraine
Our brunch on caning has generated some interesting spin-offs. Today's topic was suggested by our good friend A.J.
If your partner wants to feel the cane, and you don't want to do it and, quoting Ronnie: "No-one should receive a hard caning from someone who doesn't know what they're doing," would you take him/her to a pro who does? On the reverse: if you were offered that, would you accept that offer and go?
Please leave your response as a comment, and once everyone has had a
chance to speak, I will publish a summary of your responses.
Slava Ukraini
Glory to Ukraine
A mondegreen is a misunderstood or misinterpreted word or phrase resulting from a mishearing of the lyrics of a song. Let's stretch that definition to include words or phrases other than songs, and here's what happens.
 |
And some that are not mondegreens, just misused words, but they're funny anyway.
Happy Thursday!
Slava Ukraini
Glory to Ukraine
Last week I posted a spanking song I had discovered accidentally. Well, it seems there are plenty more out there.
Our good friend Rosco reported that Christina Aguilera asks for a spanking in her “Nasty Naughty Boy”, among other things. The sound quality is inferior in this live version, but the video is fun.
Oh my! And there are more songs to come, so stay tuned.
Slava Ukraini
Glory to Ukraine
Do you have any tips for spanking sensitive areas?
Rosco: I never would have predicted it, but Irene spanks my balls and I like it. Obviously a little discretion on the implement and intensity is necessary. Once in a while she’s a little too enthusiastic but there've been no lasting physical or emotional scars.
Roz: What comes to mind when it comes to sensitive areas is be careful and deliberate with your aim and watch the intensity.
Barrel: We do, which
prompted the question. There is an area just above the crease at the
bottom of the buttocks and on either side of the vertical separation
between the cheeks. Extending out 2" (5cm for those of you using
metric) from that intersection, we call the golden triangle. I find it
the most sensitive area my wife spanks. We have a small, blue slapper
that works well in those tight quarters. But when I am bent over and
restrained, my wife likes to try to land the tips of the xh tawse in the
golden triangle. I wear a protective cup for obvious reasons. When
she is successful, I find it...memorable.
I just bought an 18"
(45cm) cane that is 1/4" (6.35mm) in diameter for use when we travel, as
we have a cruise planned next year. It fits in our carry-on roller
bags and is relatively quiet when applied. While she is still
practising with it, she finds it easy to land in intimate areas.
FL: The classic "sit spots" do it for me. I've also had my hands tawsed and my erection flogged, both of which I quite enjoyed but wouldn't classify as spanking.
Wendel: The sit spot for us.
Bonnie: When my
husband smacks me with a serious implement, it's all sensitive.
Striking my bits is an absolute hard limit. We're not into torture.
There's plenty of available skin back there for him to punish.
His
favorite spots to spank are the under curves of my bottom. He wants to
make sure that it hurts every time I sit. Believe me. It hurts. He
often works over the tops of my thighs in back for the same reason. I
have less padding there which makes this technique worse than swats on
my butt.
He has one cruel practice that I dread. My bottom is
pretty tough thanks to our regular sessions with the paddle. But there
are places where he can lay down vivid marks and bruises with relatively
little effort. When he decides I am a particularly bad girl, my love
spreads my cheeks and beats my inner surfaces repeatedly using the solid
wooden hairbrush. This kind of punishment stays with me long after the
spanking is over.
Prefectdt: I once was an uptight, bottom, thighs only spanko. But after many years of compromising, with more mainstream BDSMers, I have some limited experience with CBT. I can only recommend that the fleshier part of the thigh and not the actual knee is used when “putting the knee in”. And that kicking only happens with the middle part of the foot and not the toe.
Rosco: Weighing in
for the second time, I haven’t delivered a spanking since the Carter
Administration. My wife Irene is all to happy to do the spanking in our
relationship. It’s worked out wonderfully.
I did deliver 3
spankings, a few minutes apart one evening at a time when I had never
even made out with a girl (we did so afterwards). We were on the beach
at night and had wandered away from the others.
We began to
wrestle playfully. At one point I turned her over in what we call the
diaper position (to keep her face out of the sand) and slapped her
bottom a few times. I stopped only because I didn’t want to be accused
of being weird.
But she seemed to like it, and a few minutes
later I did it again. The third time, I slapped either cheek several
times then went for a spot in-between and little lower down. I didn’t
smack hard, but she was wearing a onesie with loose short pants that had
ridden up so the whole thing was quite a thrill for me - and I think
for her as well.
Making out ensued, as well as third base at her behest.
A.J.: God, I'm such a wimp.
I
read Ronnie's treatise on caning. And what hit me (Was that a pun???)
was understanding what a caning is, the types of canes, the length of
canes, practising on objects before you dare use one, the tip speed,
warnings on the target areas. Whew! That's a lot of work! That I
don't want to do. And Mark's line: "instant clarity of pain," pretty much said "No" to me.
Side
note: Many years ago I met this woman for the first time for some
strictly OTK fun. Talked to her for almost two hours she was so
fascinating! Took me on a tour of her place before the main event.
Along a wall were hung many of her "tools of the trade." And at the end
- a bullwhip! A fer-real bullwhip!
"You use that?"
"It's rare, but yes. I charge a lot more. And need a couple weeks to prepare."
"Why?"
"Because
I use it so rarely and the damage it can deal out is so great I have to
practice for hours over several days in advance, before the
appointment."
I passed.
And I'm still not interested in caning.
Hermione: Just the sit spots for us. I'm not interested in being hurt in any other areas.
Slava Ukraini
Glory to Ukraine
We've all come through another busy week and now it's time to relax. Last week we discussed helpful tips on wielding a cane.
Do you have similar tips, perhaps more “impactful”, on how and where to spank the most sensitive areas? Are these reserved for special spankings?
Please leave your response as a comment, and once everyone has had a chance to speak, I will publish a summary of your helpful hints. Thank you, Barrel, for suggesting this follow-up topic.
Slava Ukraini
Glory to Ukraine
Our very dear friend Ronnie has published a post with a wealth of information on caning. She should know what she's talking about, as she sells a variety of canes and has had much first-hand experience being on the receiving end.
Here is her advice. While you are visiting her blog, please do take the opportunity to order a cane or two.
Slava Ukraini
Glory to Ukraine
Each evening while I am preparing dinner, Ron goes to the laptop on our dining room table and chooses a stream of music from Youtube. Last night it was a compilation of folk tunes. We listened to the familiar songs by our favourite performers - Gordon Lightfoot, Neil Young, Ian and Sylvia, Colleen Peterson. (See what I did there? All Canadian superstars.)
Then a song came on that was unfamiliar, and not folk at all. Jazz, perhaps? But the lyrics were unmistakably spanko. It's a rather naughty song, and I think you'll enjoy it as much as I did.
That sound, oh baby, that sound.
Slava Ukraini
Glory to Ukraine
Need advice on caning technique? Read on!
Bonnie: For me, a
punishment with the cane is intense to be sure, but it's not the worst
implement. I reserve that distinction for a solid wooden bath brush.
It feels like a hairbrush, but it burns much hotter. Spankings with
this long handled brush leave vivid marks on my bottom and next day
soreness.
As far as advice, I'd say remember to breathe. If skin
damage is a problem, wear a pair of cotton panties or some leggings.
Moisturizing lotion can help afterward. For the spankers, please take
care to avoid our hips and back.
Anon: The cane is a
very exotic and erotic implement with one of the longest traditions.
Three pieces of advice that I'm sure others would share. First, start
with a manageable size. You needn't start with the senior cane -- work
your way up to it if desired.
Second, the spanker should
definitely practice on a pillow long enough to gain confidence of
control and accuracy before going to work on a human! If you're
worried, then cover the lower back and the thighs. Also, practice not
wrapping, as that can be painful and leave unwanted marks.
Third,
position is everything for both parties. It may work best with the
victim over a pile of pillows to start before graduating to the bent
over position. In the latter position, it usually works best for the
caner to be slightly ahead of the recipient's bottom to effectively
cover both cheeks without wrapping.
Back to point 1, a lighter, shorter cane is not likely to do so much damage with a mishit, so definitely a good place to start.
Enjoy...the cane is my favorite to receive and hope you learn to appreciate it.
Mark: I'd agree with Bonnie, I find wooden paddles much worse. They don't however have the instant clarity of pain that you get with a cane, and not the welts either. I think that it is important that the cane is applied with a very full swing - arm taken right back and wrist cranked back further - then brought down on the bottom as hard as the caner can achieve. Particularly so with women caning men, strike as hard as you can and with the tip lined up to hit the far cheek firmly but not wrap past it.
Do this and the recipient will hear the stroke but not feel anything for a few milliseconds and then there will be a blinding pain. Give them time to process this before applying the next in the same fashion.
The cane you use needs to have a bit of weight too; 10 - 13mm diameter works well. There will be significant bruising at the 13mm diameter on a new cane.
Done well, six strokes are plenty. Over 12 and there will definitely be good bruising and the chance of breaking the skin increases.
Roz: Some great advice above. We haven't used a cane that often so I don't have much in the way of advice to share except that aim is so important. For me I find it a very intense implement.
Barrel: I bought our delrin canes from Aunt Kay at DWC so we have had them a long time. They came with a short VHS tape and several pages of examples how to use the canes effectively. That said, my wife still has mis-hits.
I agree that practising on a pillow can help. Practise standing further away from the target as the caner’s arm will always extend further than expected, resulting the tip of the cane to wrap, most often around to the sides of the hips, which is really unpleasant.
Know that thin canes (3/16”) will leave deep welts and may break the skin slightly. Thicker canes leave welts but also a deeper soreness, so give some thought to the desired end result.
My wife and I will usually have a short discussion after she canes me, reviewing the marks and my input on the intensity of her caning. If either of us doesn’t feel the caning was what either of us expected, we will have a topping off to achieve the spacing, color and depth of the welts. Those strokes are always as hard as she can swing and when applied on top of an already marked and welted skin, are memorable.
I find the cane the most intense implement she employs. I dislike the deep bruising and soreness, preferring welts and blood blisters, which I wear as a badge of honor. I do believe that regular canings are fun and needed.
Prefectdt: For this, I am talking about rattan canes and nothing else.
Most
canes have a natural bend to them; if you can, just before playing, flex
the cane and increase the bend as much as possible. Then, when aiming,
place the cane so that the bend goes away from the buttocks at the far
end. Then plan the strike so that the cane lands on the nearest buttock
first, and the natural flexibility of the rattan should make an even
contact across the buttocks. For the recipient, this will give the
effect of evenly laid out pain along the stripe of impact.
When
coming from a side on swing, like in a bent over the desk situation,
always aim the stroke to land short, just at the start of the second
buttock. In these situations, the stroke always lands further on than is
planned. And the line should now end up fully across both sides of the
bottom without wrapping around to the hip bones.
A caner should
take their time. Wait between each stroke until the red line of the last
stroke laid on appears. This should take between 15 and 30 seconds. The
caner can then assess the stroke and compensate for any inaccuracies
for the next stroke.
If you are on the receiving end, be prepared
for the first stroke of a caning to be a shock to the system. It always
is, even for those of us with a lot of experience with canes.
Rosco: We’ve never used a cane. Irene doesn’t like to plan. She’s fairly whimsical and unlikely to want to count out six of the best or take the necessary care to whack the exact right spot.
A.J.: Interesting comments. Very.
But thanks, anyway. Still not interested in caning, giving or receiving. (Am I boring…?)
Hermione: Thank you for all the excellent advice -- no doubt from first-hand experience. Some years ago I posted a dissertation on the cane, which you may find helpful.
Ronnie: Here is my advice.
Slava Ukraini
Glory to Ukraine
Last week, we had several readers explain that they either hadn't used a cane and wanted to, or that using one wasn't comfortable yet. Our good friend Barrel suggested this follow-up.
For those of you that do use a cane regularly and effectively, what advice or experience might you share to help others experience this most intense toy?
Please leave your response as a comment, and once everyone has had a chance to speak, I will publish a summary of your helpful hints.
Slava Ukraini
Glory to Ukraine
Is there an implement you haven't figured out, or have never tried but would like to?
Dan: For me, it's the cane. It is such an iconic instrument that I feel like it should be part of my wife's "go to" arsenal. But, we've tried it several times, and for some reason my wife really struggles to use it effectively. She's read materials about how to cane effectively and watched videos showing how to use, but somehow it just doesn't work.
Rosco: Irene has
arthritis in her hands, so we’ve been focusing on implements with round
handles for awhile. Most recently I bought a small wooden paddle that
has quite an impact and wrapped the handle with a spongy sort of medical
tape. It works very well, and I’m surprised there’s been no bruising
because it certainly feels like it.
And when we’re out hiking I’m
always looking for a good switch. They’re hard to find in our area. The
best have been shoots at the base of wild plum trees in the spring.
Maybe we’ll find something new next year.
Wendel: The one implement we do not have is a cane. It is something we have talked about buying and trying out one day. On hikes we will look for the ideal stick to whip each other’s bottom like a cane, but we never keep them.
Roz: I'm afraid my answer is a boring one. I can't think of anything in particular at the moment.
Luvinhub: Similar to the others the cane and a switch are two that my ass has yet to feel. The cane is a curiosity and scary. The switch, I have fantasized and even written stories for my wife of being on one of our bike rides when I do something wrong and a few steps from the trail she uses a switch to discipline me.
Jack: My wife/mommy has tried several items, when she first used the bathbrush and saw my reaction she used it and still look for something more effective, she could not find one.
Prefectdt: Several years ago I made a chamois leather flogger. It has to be used wet as it is stiff and brittle when dry. It got swung once, at a very weak practice stroke, inside a tiled bathroom. It produced so much spray that even in that situation, it was deemed not to be any good for indoor play. So it sits in the toy box, stiff and brittle waiting to be soaked and used properly. I so want to know what it is like being wet flogged with that toy, but will probably never experience it as it was meant to be used.
Barrel: I bought a
single tail whip several months ago. It is about 36" long including the
tail at the end which is called a popper. The popper can be changed
from a soft chamois leather strip to twin 6" heavy leather tails. It
currently sports the heavy leather tails. Despite watching videos and
practising on a pillow, my wife is still learning how to administer a
whipping with it.
Standing back to extend the full length, while
trying to land just the tips, it varies from sensual to intense. When
she holds it at mid length, she can land it wherever she wishes, from my
back to my thighs.
When we finish a session with it, she always
tells me she really liked it. Thus the fascination knowing as she
improves in using it, I will need to learn to like it as well.
Bonnie: You stumped me! I can't think of any interesting implement type we haven't already tried.
Hermione: I've always been curious to find out what it would be like to receive a proper caning with a school cane. We have a short wooden cane, suitable for otk, but it just feels like being whacked with a wooden dowel.
I have also been intrigued by the thought of being birched. Many of the stories in The Pearl feature vigorous birchings, but I suspect the experience would not be at all pleasant.
Ronnie: No, can’t think of anything I’d want to try.
Slava Ukraini
Glory to Ukraine
Welcome! I hope you all had an uneventful Hallowe'en. Our street was blocked off for four hours so that kids could rampage over the neighbourhood without fear of being run over. However, steady rain and near-freezing temperatures caused the event to be packed up by 7:30. Thank goodness!
Thanks to our good friend Barrel, we have a topic that I've never considered before.
Is there an implement that you haven’t quite figured out or perfected its use, that fascinates you? Or one you don’t have yet that intrigues you, and why?
Please leave your response as a comment, and once everyone has had a chance to speak, I will publish a summary of our discussion.
Slava Ukraini
Glory to Ukraine
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