To what degree does the submissiveness (or dominance) associated with spanking carry over into the rest of your life?
I'd love to hear from you, so please leave your response as a comment. Once everyone has spoken, I will publish an edited summary of our discussion.
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11 comments:
This is a great question! When we had an active dynamic I guess it did flow into other areas of life in the sense that I deferred the ultimate final decision making to Rick, and these decisions were nearly always around other areas of life. This may sound contradictory to my previous comment, but having an active dynamic also gave me more confidence in other areas of life.
In addition to the above, permissions were at one time required to do certain activities in the vanilla world.
Hugs
Roz
I don’t think we do anything different during the day as a result of spanking each other.
I can only think of the closeness, the feeling of connection and downright honesty that naturally flows on from our spanking activities. Because it is a desire of mine for her, and her alone, to spank me and share this desire with, there is nothing more to give, no other secret or layer to discover - it is me, all of me, everything.
Because of this, we love it when we can connect with deep, honest conversation. It enriches our physical relationship and the spanking and on it goes...
Yorkie
I feel it is a part of our life, does not carry over, it is our relationship. My wife is the anchor of our marriage. I tend to as she puts it "be a little boy" at times. She by her looks, talk, tells me if I'm going to far, others don't notice it, it is very discreet. It is not a secret to her close friends, and her mother knows, approves, and even went as far to purchase the hairbrush that is used. She had it engraved "Motherly Love", my bare bottom would not agree. She is what keeps the marriage together, she loves me, at times I wonder why, but then again when over her lap for a spanking, and dancing around afterwards I know deep down she loves me. Jack
I find as I age and inch ever closer to retirement, I am growing more submissive to my wife. Maybe my alpha male gas tank is running out of gas? Yet I find not only enjoyment but comfort and contentment in where I am heading. Life is really good right now.
I am totally submissive to my wife, when it comes to our spanking relationship. I find the submissiveness gives peace and joy. I also deeply appreciate the pain she inflicts out and the aftermath.
This doesn't extend to other parts of our relationship. We are quite the equals in the rest of our lives.
We are equals inmost aspects of our lives. My spankings are not punishment but by my request, sometimes very sensual sometimes very hard but always loving. Spanking for me is a great stress relief a big sign of her love that she is willing to do it for me.
My submissiveness only seems to surface when I am playing. In vanilla life I am not submissive at all.
Prefectdt
Virtually none. Maybe we're more attentive to each other because of the closeness that spanking brings out.
I massage Irene’s feet, wash her lingerie and serve in whatever other ways she asks. But only for a few hours each week.
Most of the time we cooperate as equals and squabble a little.
I work in a political job that sometimes requires being more aggressive than I like, but I’m always respectful.
- Rosco
Sorry I'm late to the party. We live a 24/7 D/s lifestyle ( well as close to it as we can at least) so perhaps we are different in that way compared to some. The erotic nature of spankings comes FROM the Dominance and Submission before and after the spanking. In essence the spankings, while useful as one of the most overt examples of D/s, is not the main event. Without feeling his dominance before the spankings feel hollow.
After a spanking, (ideally) I am feeling very submissive and if his dominance does not continue, or he has to leave for work, I feel like he has opened the door to my submission and I have no where to put it. So to sum it all up, it is VERY important and is a key factor in our lives.
willie
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