Hi there! I'm so glad you could join us in our weekly discussion. Our good friend Bonnie presented me with a treasure trove of topics, so I closed my eyes and picked this one.
When a spankee requests a spanking, does it tend to be more severe than when it is the spanker's idea?
Please leave your response as a comment, and I will publish an edited summary of our discussion once everyone has weighed in.
Glory to Ukraine
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13 comments:
I suggested this question because it's definitely true for us. Randy is delighted when I ask him to spank me or bring him an implement. But in such cases, he makes absolutely certain that such needs won't arise again for a good while. Since I asked, I can't really complain that it hurts. But it always hurts!
Top from bottom? I'll be black and blue for a week when its over!
From my submissive perspective, I'm ASKING for it! I'm in need. I'd expect a blistering, nothing less.
If I were lucky enough to have a girlfriend approach me with this request to Top her, I'd see it as an opportunity for fluent self-expression. Her bottom would be my blank canvas; I'd paint it with a Masterful masterpiece. She should expect to get it very hard indeed.
Warmly,
Jean Marie
It depends on what the spankee is asking for. In a discipline relationship where spanking is used for that purpose, where the spankee doesn't want a severe spanking, severe is not asked for. A more severe spanking tends to happen when bad behavior is what brought about the trouble. In the case of a confession, punishment can be moderated to some degree because of the honesty and owning up to the failure. Spanking may be used for other purposes, like for wish fulfillment, whatever the spankee is asking for. That is an entirely different and nice situation.
I rarely asked for a spanking. In our case I wouldn't say the resulting spanking was harsher than usual. From memory it tended to be more of a fun spanking, though it definitely counted!
Hugs
Roz
Whenever the Misses asks for a spanking, she wants it harder than normal. She will present me with the paddle, bare her bottom and get across my lap. I will paddle every inch of her bottom until she cannot sit comfortably for at least a day. The Misses spanks me enough that I do not need to ask but on the rare occasion when I do, she will whip my bottom with the belt hard enough that I am sore for the next two days.
Great question. I think I will go ask for a spanking right now.
Wendel
I never “ask”. Generally I get it anyway. But if I want a spanking, or an extended or harder spanking, I simply complain. I sass. I pout. I resist. The more I do things, the more I’ll be punished.
Our safe word is “later”. If one of us is not in the mood, we’ll ask if we can do it later.
Our spankings are pretty much 100% roleplay where I am punished for something. So I never ask. But once in a while “someone” will deliver a note to Irene which delineates my naughty behavior and need for discipline.
Rosco
By prior arrangements, I am paddled on Tuesday and Friday nights before bedtime, hard enough and long enough to meet my needs - painful but something I enjoy. My wife would be unhappy if I were to request a (third) spanking - something I will not do. She is comfortable with our present arrangement and so am I. I always thank her for spanking me - not because I have to, but because I genuinely appreciate what she has done for me. And we kiss.
Doug
Can't say that I have ever noticed much difference, really. I think that the difference will be noticed more by people who have one main spanker. It would be interesting, if some spankers respond to this subject. Just to see if being asked for a spanking, by a Sub, fires them up more than when they initiate the play.
Prefectdt
When I've asked fP or a spanking, he makes sure I know I've had one:)
Love,
Ronnie
xx
For us, it’s probably the opposite. When I asked to be spanked, or leave a paddle on her dresser, I always get spanked but not nearly as hard as when it is her idea. And never as hard or long as when we plan a session. I try not to ask for spanking too often as I want my wife to be an active participant in the idea, but she welcomes my outreach and always responds.
Cheers,
Barrel
Great topic. My wife spanks me whenever she feels that I need it. One day she told me that she tired of my laziness and that I needed a really "good" spanking. She said that her mother had volunteered to do it. To say the least I was shocked, I knew her mother knew about our lifestyle, but to actually have her participate wow.
She told me that I had to go MIL's house and politely ask her to spank me hard and long.
I went over and when she answered the door I asked hot spank me.
She took me inside, sat on a chair and made me stand in front of her as she took my pants and panties down, put me over knee and used a wooden paddle on me. It was the most severe spanking n my whole life. So the answer is yes, asking for a spanking will earn you a real bottom blistering.
It depends. Usually, I'm asking for a stress-relief spanking, which would tend to be hard but sexy. If I'm asking because I did something wrong that she doesn't know about, then I'm probably going to have no say in how hard it will be and it will likely be on the severe side!
Graham
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