Showing posts with label play. Show all posts
Showing posts with label play. Show all posts

Monday, August 16, 2010

The Audition


While dusting the top shelf recently, I discovered a long-forgotten little paperback nestled between two larger volumes. Miss Rattan's Lesson, by Yolanda Celbridge, is a series of loosely-connected adventures of Thomas Peake. After receiving a sound caning from Miss Rattan at age 18, he develops a taste for disciplining naughty female bottoms, and does so repeatedly and thoroughly while attempting to study at University. The story is set in the Roaring Twenties.

In today's selection, Peake has been told by Edwina, one of his enthusiastic spanking partners, that he would be perfect playing one of the leading roles in a new play. He arrives at the theatre just as a rehearsal is ending. The director is annoyed by his unexpected presence.


"Now what can I do for you, sir?"


"You are Juliet Haize, the director?" He said. "Edwina Cheshunt bade me attend you."


He pronounced "director" with sufficient reverence to thaw her initial irritation. The woman nodded her assent. She was a handsome female, full-figured in a sombre grey shirt and grey woollen skirt which did not quite cover her knees; sensible shoes and dark blue stockings. Her hair was knotted in a white kerchief.


"Oh," she said, "you must be the young man Edwina spoke of -- I take it you have acted before?"


"Not exactly," said Peake.


"Meaning no," said Juliet Haze. "Why can men never speak directly? Well, Edwina is a flibbertigibbet, and not quite serious -- she knows nothing of the plays of Ibsen or Shaw -- but she is a good judge of character."


Peake said that Edwina had explained very little.


"I am directing the lost play of Aristophanes, The Drudges," she explained.


Peake said he was unfamiliar with the work.


"That is because it is lost", she said, clutching her brow. "I discovered it myself, in the Bodleian Library... The play concerns a slave uprising in Sparta. The men are away at war, leaving their womenfolk as mistresses of the city. The female slaves, tired of constant punishment for their misdemeanours, revolt, and subject their erstwhile mistresses to the same humiliations as they themselves endured. But the trick is, when the men come back and liberate the women, they find that they do not want to be liberated. They like being freed of responsibility having the noble toil of the drudge, and it must be said, frequent spankings and, sort of, whippings."


"You can't really have sort of whippings, Juliet," said Peake. "Either they are whippings or they are not."


"Well yes, whippings then. That is where you come in, as Phryne the slave mistress. You see, you don't have many lines, but in a way you are the lynchpin of the whole thing; you administer punishments impartially. Only mimed, of course, for the stage, but mimed realistically. The modern theatre must be realistic above all things."


They talk some more over lunch at a nearby restaurant. When they return to the theatre, everyone else has departed.


At the deserted hall, she carefully closed the door. Peake asked for a script, assuming he would have to read some lines.

"The script is not important at this stage. Your lines are mostly simple commands, to strip or bend over for punishment. I must audition you for what happens afterwards."

"You mean miming a spanking?"

"Not strictly mime. The spanking must be just hard enough to make a convincing and realistic noise. I am to play a token role, as a female slave, therefore you will attend to my bottom, please, Mr. Peake. Are you shocked?"

Peake gravely shook his head, and said that realism was essential to art.

"Perhaps you are not as bourgeois as I thought," said Juliet with approval. "You had better take me over your knee, I suppose. There are twenty-three females to be spanked in this play, Mr. Peake, and you shall have the lion's share of the spanking. I wish to be sure of your stamina."

The stage set represented Phryne's drawing room, where much of the action took place. There was a sofa and armchair, a table and various fans and tropical accoutrements. Juliet ordered Peake to sit on the sofa.

"Right!" said Juliet. "I shall bend over your knee -- you must hold me down, for I shall pretend to wriggle a lot -- and you must give me a spanking. Not hard enough to hurt, of course, but hard enough to make a good cracking noise. Lucinda should be here, to stand at the back and judge -- oh, where is she? Bother, we shall just start without her, to get me -- to get you accustomed to things."

She lay down rather gingerly across Peake's thigh, then allowed the weight of her body to press fully on him, totally relaxing her muscles in a position of complete helplessness. She lifted her skirts, revealing a pair of very high white panties and a garter belt of lace which was surprisingly frilly. Peake lifted his arm.

"Haven't you forgotten something?" she said. "Spankings are given on the bare, aren't they? I'm rather new to this."

Her voice dropped to a murmur as she said this, and had the resonance of untruth. Peake pulled her panties down in a swift motion, to reveal two full round fesses, taut and already clenched in expectation of his blows. The panties had become wedged at her stocking tops, and she said he should undo her straps and roll the panties down to her ankes, for realism. He did so, and she murmured that he should unroll her stockings too, as it would look more humiliating. He took his time at this task, rolling the sheer silk over long, smooth legs whose tender, pale skin was just as silky.

He began to spank her bare bottom, laying quite delicate strokes on the skin, and at each slap she trembled energetically. After a while, she said he was not doing it hard enough. For realism, he must hurt her a little bit, must feel angry at her, and then she would feel angry too, and her squirms and cries would be most realistic.

"Imagine that I've delivered some terrible insult," she said. "That I've said -- what is it you say to men? -- that you've got a tiny dangler. Yes! You've got a little tiny dangler, Mr. Peake."

Peake laughed and said this would scarcely be applicable to the character he was playing, the female Mistress Phryne.

"Oh, you confuse me. Well, your master has a tiny dangler! So there!"

Peake began to spank her bare fesses with force. Now her wriggles came in earnest, and a delicate pink suffused her bum-flesh, her cries of "Oh!" And "Ouch!" And "Steady on!" While not particularly theatrical, did not seem feigned either. Peake asked mildly if he was hurting her, but as he did so began to spank even harder.

"You know you are! I don't like it one bit! Edwina was right, you are a brute. But it is important to -- Oh! Oh! Oh! -- to have realism. God that smarts, sir. You are cruel, do you know? I bet you have spanked many girls before. Ouch! Oh! My bare bum! You horrid man!"

She was gasping for breath now, her bare bottom a squirming mass of mottled crimson, and Peake had to hold her firmly to keep her on his knee. His hand began to spank her below her buttocks, on the tender skin of her thighs, and her legs thrashed. Now she greeted each spank with a shrill yelp, interspersed with sobs, and her whole body was trembling as his blows rained on her buttocks.

"Don't stop," she panted. "Ah! Aaah! God, my bum is on fire! I've never had such pain. I feel this is my finest performance. There will be headlines in the Daily Herald. Such realism!"

"Yes, yes," she whispered through her tears. "You have got the part."


From Hermione's Heart

Wednesday, July 7, 2010

From the Top Shelf - St. Dominic's III


Back to Scene II


St. Dominic's, 1917

Scene III

School song again. Dropcloth appears with caption: "A BEANO IN THE DORM AT WHICH A SCORE IS SETTLED". Dropcloth rises. Lights up to reveal dormitory setting as in the first scene. The four girls are onstage, slipping out of gymslips and changing into nighties. Other girls could also be present, already wearing pyjamas, nightdresses, and other kinds of schoolgirl deshabille.

ELSPETH: Who's in favour of tripping the light fantastic before we broach the ginger beer?

FAUVETTE: What a perfectly chubby wheeze!

GWEN: Absolutely slap-bang!

All the girls cheer.

GWEN: Right-ho! Combs and paper at the ready! One-two-three!

Some of the girls produce combs and paper and start to play a popular waltz. The others choose partners and dance. ELSPETH approaches MORVYTH, who look lonely.

ELSPETH: Care to borrow my bedjacket, young Morvyth?

MORVYTH: You're a brick, Elspeth, but I'm not sure lilac's my colour.

FAUVETTE (to audience): Mumbled Morvyth, turning hot with pleasure at the bare idea.

ELSPETH: Never mind, baby, you look nice in anything.

FAUVETTE (to audience): Returned Elspeth soothingly.

ELSPETH: And your white petticoat's a perfect dream. I always said it was a shame to hide it under a dress.

ELSPETH and MORVYTH waltz together. The mood and tempo are dreamy and romantic. Everyone except FAUVETTE and the comb-and-paper players are dancing.

FAUVETTE (to audience): Gwen's cheeks were scarlet and Morvyth's long fair hair floated out picturesquely as she twirled around in Elspeth Moseley's arms.

FAUVETTE moves towards Gwen's bed. Suddenly, Miss Beesley, in a dressing gown, marches into the dormitory.

ALL: Cave--the Bumble Bee!

MISS BEESLEY (genially): I hope I'm not turning up like the proverbial bad penny! It's not my intention to be the specter at the feast. I was deeply impressed by your doughty efforts in the end-of-term exams, and I thought it might not be taken amiss if I put in an appearance at your beano.

The girls cheer.

Let the festivities continue.

ELSPETH: In honour of the Bumble Bee's--I mean Miss Beesley's--presence, may I propose a toast in foaming flagons of ginger pop! (She offers Miss Beesley a glass.) Here's to the health of St. Dominic's, the grandest school of all!

The girls all raise their glasses, but before they can drink, FAUVETTE cries out.

FAUVETTE: Just a jiffy, you fellows! I've found my postal order--and it's here, in Elspeth's locker.

General cry of astonishment. FAUVETTE points at the locker. ELSPETH goes over and snatches the postal order from inside it. GWEN looks abashed.

The girls freeze in a group.

VOICE: Your final choice between Elspeth (ELSPETH steps forward) . . . and Fauvette/Morvyth/Gwen? (Pause for vote.). ____________________ is hereby exonerated.

The group unfreezes and the action continues.

FAUVETTE: I hate being a tattle-tale, but her locker was open, and there it was!

MISS BEESLEY (to ELSPETH): Can you explain how Fauvette's postal order came to be in your locker?

ELSPETH: It's not an atom of use asking me, I haven't a ghost of a notion.

GWEN (to audience): Was any wretched girl ever in such a fix?

MISS BEESLEY: Things will go easier for you if you make a clean breast of it.

ELSPETH: I'm sorry, Miss Beesley, but I have nothing to confess.

GWEN (to audience): Hot tears came welling up, but Elspeth brushed them away angrily.

MISS BEESLEY: Theft is an ugly word, Elspeth. In all the years of my headmistressship, incidents such as this have very seldom occurred. I have had unruliness and disobedience before, but in the whole of my experience never a girl more brazen than you. It is of course impossible for me to allow you to remain at St. Dominic's.



Continue as follows if ELSPETH is the victim:

I will deal with you myself in the morning. In the meantime, I shall hand you over to the tender mercies of Gwen--the new monitor of the Fifth--who has full disciplinary powers. (She exits.)

GWEN (to audience): The Bumble Bee always reminds me of an ancient Roman--the State first and foremost in her estimates, and herself nowhere. (She seats herself on one of the beds.) Hairbrush if you please, Elspeth, or are you going to show the white feather?

ELSPETH: I may be a blighter, but as least I don't funk!



Continue as follows if GWEN is the victim:

MISS BEESLEY turns to leave. As she does so, MORVYTH rushes forward.

MORVYTH: Please, Miss Beesley, may I speak?

MISS BEESLEY: What is it, Morvyth?

MORVYTH: I'll take my oath Elspeth's telling the truth. The real culprit is Gwen. She's green with envy because Elspeth's top dog and she'll go to any lengths to do her down. I saw her putting the postal order into Elspeth's locker.

MISS BEESLEY: Is this true, Gwen?

GWEN is silent.

Are you willing to swear that it's false?

GWEN shakes her head.

In that case, I must apologize to Elspeth, who has undeservedly borne the brunt of my strictures. As for you, Gwen, you have set a most pernicious example, and I will deal with you myself in the morning. In the meantime, I shall hand you over to the tender mercies of your monitor, who has full disciplinary powers. (She exits.)

GWEN (to audience): The Bumble Bee always reminds me of an ancient Roman--the State first and foremost in her estimates, and herself nowhere.

ELSPETH (seating herself on one of the beds.): Hairbrush if you please, Gwen, or are you going to show the white feather?

GWEN: I may be a blighter, but as least I don't funk!



Continue as follows if MORVYTH is the victim:


MISS BEESLEY turns to leave. As she does so, Gwen rushes forward.

GWEN: Please, Miss Beesley, may I speak?

MISS BEESLEY: What is it, Gwen?

GWEN: I'll take my oath Elspeth's telling the truth. The real culprit is Morvyth. She's green with envy because Elspeth's top dog and she'll go to any lengths to do her down. I saw her putting the postal order into Elspeth's locker.

MISS BEESLEY: Is this true, Morvyth?

MORVYTH is silent.

Are you willing to swear that it's false?

MORVYTH shakes her head.

In that case, I must apologize to Elspeth, who has undeservedly borne the brunt of my strictures. As for you, Morvyth, you have set a most pernicious example, and I will deal with you myself in the morning. In the meantime, I shall hand you over to the tender mercies of your monitor, who has full disciplinary powers. (She exits.)

GWEN (to audience): The Bumble Bee always reminds me of an ancient Roman--the State first and foremost in her estimates, and herself nowhere.

ELSPETH (seating herself on one of the beds.): Hairbrush if you please, Morvyth, or are you going to show the white feather?

MORVYTH: I may be a blighter, but as least I don't funk!



Continue as follows if FAUVETTE is the victim:


MISS BEESLEY turns to leave. As she does so, MORVYTH rushes forward.

MORVYTH: Please, Miss Beesley, may I speak?

MISS BEESLEY: What is it, Morvyth?

MORVYTH: I'll take my oath Elspeth's telling the truth. Fauvette's green with envy because Elspeth's top dog and she'll go to any lengths to do her down. The real culprit is Fauvette herself!I saw her putting the postal order into Elspeth's locker.

MISS BEESLEY: Is this true, Fauvette?

FAUVETTE is silent.

Are you willing to swear that it's false?

FAUVETTE shakes her head.

In that case, I must apologize to Elspeth, who has undeservedly borne the brunt of my strictures. As for you, Fauvette, you have set a most pernicious example, and I will deal with you myself in the morning. In the meantime, I shall hand you over to the tender mercies of your monitor, who has full disciplinary powers. (She exits.)

GWEN (to audience): The Bumble Bee always reminds me of an ancient Roman--the State first and foremost in her estimates, and herself nowhere.

ELSPETH (seating herself on one of the beds.): Hairbrush if you please, Fauvette, or are you going to show the white feather?

FAUVETTE: I may be a blighter, but as least I don't funk!



The VICTIM fetches a hairbrush from her washstand, gives it to the MONITOR and bends over her knee. The MONITOR slowly raises the VICTIM'S nightie to the waist and, even more slowly, pulls down her knickers. The other girls gather round to watch the spanking. It takes place in slow motion, with the VICTIM ritualistically wriggling as each blow falls. The girls count in unison.

We should feel that this is a kind of tribal ceremony--the sacrifice of the willing victim. As the MONITOR spanks, it might be a good idea to project on the backcloth a moving closeup of the VICTIM'S bottom. The counting grows louder and the pace increases. At about the count of ten, we hear electronic "take-off" music, possibly like the sound used by the Beatles in "
A Day in the Life". As this sound and the spanking reach a climax, we


BLACKOUT


From Hermione's Heart

Tuesday, July 6, 2010

From the Top Shelf - St. Dominic's II



St. Dominic's, 1917

Scene II
Back to Scene I

School song is heard again. Dropcloth appears with a projected caption: "HIGH JINKS AND HOT WATER IN THE OFFING". Dropcloth rises. Lights go up to reveal classroom with desks and blackboard. FAUVETTE, GWEN, and MORVYTH are seated, chattering. ELSPETH enters.

ELSPETH: Cave, all concerned! Miss Beesley's approaching in full sail!

ALL sit demurely upright. MISS BEESLEY enters in scholastic gown.

MISS BEESLEY: Good morning, girls!

ALL: Good morning, Miss Beesley!

ELSPETH (to audience): Miss Beesley is a handsome and imposing woman with a stern cast of features.

MISS BEESLEY: Members of the Fifth! I have some remarks to address to two of your number. First of all, Morvyth.

MORVYTH rises.

It's come to my ears that you have been acting like a weeping cherub on a monument. Now that won't do at all--we've no patience with grousers at St. Dominic's. It's your bounden duty to be bubbling and girlish so that you can carry away happy memories of your lighthearted schooldays when you go out into the world to be a woman. Do you understand, Morvyth?

MORVYTH: Yes, Miss Beesley, I'll do my uttermost. (She sits.)

MISS BEESLEY: There's a gallant girl. And now for the egregious madcap of the Fourth, lately translated to more august surroundings.

GWEN ruefully rises. The other girls giggle.

It's been brought to my attention that the aforementioned young scamp has celebrated her arrival in the Fifth by indulging in pugilistic practices with one of her senior bedfellows. Now Gwen, it's A-1 to be high-spirited, but if you overstep the mark again, there'll be a painful reckoning behind my green baize door. Compris?

GWEN (flushed): Oui--I mean, yes, Miss Beesley! (She sits.)

ELSPETH (to audience): It's an open secret that Miss Beasley, strict disciplinarian though she is, has a sneaking weakness for Gwen.

MORVYTH (to audience): "The Bumble Bee rows Gwen but she likes her" is the general verdict.

FAUVETTE has been rummaging through her desk.

FAUVETTE: Miss Beesley!

MISS BEESLEY: What is it, child?

FAUVETTE: Somebody or other has nabbed my postal order! It's vanished from my desk!

MORVYTH: Great jumping Jehosephat!



Continue below if GWEN has been eliminated earlier:

FAUVETTE: And what's more, I told Morvyth only this morning that I was going to put it there.

Everyone stares at MORVYTH who looks appalled.

GWEN (to audience): Morvyth stood aghast, utterly dumbfounded at the defalcation.

MORVYTH: Fauvette's a fibber! She's just trying to make me blub!

The four girls and MISS BEESLEY freeze in a group.

VOICE (female, over public address system): Three girls are still eligible for punishment.

The girls in question step forward.

In precisely four minutes, one of then will be whipped. We now invite you to eliminate either Fauvette or Morvyth. Please raise your right hand if you wish to spare Fauvette. (Pause for vote to be noted.) Or Morvyth. (Another pause.) ______________ is hereby exonerated.



Continue below if FAUVETTE has been eliminated earlier:

FAUVETTE: And what's more, I told Gwen only this morning that I was going to put it there.

Everyone stares at GWEN who looks appalled.

MORVYTH (to audience): Gwen stood aghast, utterly dumbfounded at the defalcation.

GWEN: I loathe pointing the finger at a chum, but you told Morvyth as well as yours truly.

The four girls and MISS BEESLEY freeze in a group.

VOICE (female, over public address system): Three girls are still eligible for punishment.

The girls in question step forward.

In precisely four minutes, one of then will be whipped. We now invite you to eliminate either Gwen or Morvyth. Please raise your right hand if you wish to spare Gwen. (Pause for vote to be noted.) Or Morvyth. (Another pause.) ______________ is hereby exonerated.



BLACKOUT

Next - Scene III



From Hermione's Heart

Monday, July 5, 2010

From the Top Shelf - St. Dominic's I


For your enjoyment, here is another scene from Oh! Calcutta! - an avant-garde theatrical revue, consisting of sketches on sex-related topics.

Due to the length of the scene, it will be published in three parts, and I will link them to each other once all have been published.

The scene takes place in a fictitious girls' school. As the plot unfolds, the audience is asked to decide which girl should be punished. Based on the response, the script is followed in different ways. I hope you like it.
But be warned: the language is a challenging mixture of girls' school lingo and outmoded expressions from the early 20th century.

(The words in italics are stage directions.)



St. Dominic's, 1917

The Cast

GWEN, FAUVETTE, MORVYTH: Fifth form girls
ELSPETH: Fifth form monitor
MISS BEESLEY: Headmistress


Scene I

Dropcloth of cover of girls' school books circa 1917. Recorded sound of girls singing school song. Superimpose projections caption: "THE FIFTH FORM AT ST. DOMINICS, 1917". Fade caption. Superimpose second caption: "CHAPTER ONE". Fade caption. Superimpose third caption: "GWEN MAKES A BAD START". Meanwhile, over the public address system:

VOICE (female): in the depth of every Englishman's subconscious there is a cat-o'-nine-tails and a schoolgirl in black stockings. Remark attributed to the French humorist, Pierre Daninos.

The school song, which has faded for the announcement, swells up and ends. The dropcloth rises. Behind it are three dormitory camp beds, occupied by GWEN, FAUVETTE, and MORVYTH. A bell rings. ELSPETH, the dormitory prefect, enters, dressed in school uniform--gymslip, black stockings, white blouse, and school tie.

ELSPETH: Come on, girls! Stir your old bones! Don't want to treat you to a jaw-wag on the first day of term. Let's have no monkey tricks, or Miss Beesley'll be down on us like a ton of bricks!

GWEN (sitting up in bed): Must you be so jinky, Elspeth? This child's fagged out entirely!

ELSPETH: Stop frivolling, you silly young blighter, or I'll splificate you!

FAUVETTE (to audience): Fumed Elspeth.

GWEN: You needn't be so peacocky, just because you're a monitor!

FAUVETTE (to audience): Chirruped Gwen, with a grin on her impish face.

ELSPETH (to GWEN): Now listen to me, you young scalawag. You may have been the firebrand of the Fourth, but this is your first day in the Fifth, and you'll have a grizzly time of it unless you mind your manners!

GWEN (jumping out of bed and slipping dark blue knickers under her nightie): No use expecting me to knuckle under, Elspeth, I'm as used to scolding as eels to skinning!

ELSPETH: Any more chat from you, and I'll report you to Miss Beesley. And a summons from that worthy rarely bodes good fortune to the recipient. (To audience) Gwen's gauche and brusque, but at heart she's unimpeachable!

Morvyth, still curled up in bed, suddenly bursts into tears.

ELSPETH (going to MORVYTH'S bed): Hello! Whence this thusness? Gracious, girl, turn off the waterworks! We don't care for this sickly sort of stuff at St. Dominic's.

MORVYTH: I'm sorry, Elspeth, but I'm dreadfully homesick!

FAUVETTE (to audience; by now she is languidly dressing and washing): Wailed Morvyth.

ELSPETH: For goodness' sake bottle it up, Morvyth!

MORVYTH: But my brother's volunteered to be a Tommy, you see, and they're sending him to the front!

ELSPETH: Then you ought to be proud of him, you silly goose! I've met some lads who've come back blinded from the war, and they're twice as cheerful and patient as you.

MORVYTH (hugging ELSPETH): You are a trump, Elspeth!

ELSPETH (extricating herself) Don't, Morvyth!

FAUVETTE (to audience): Said Elspeth huskily.

ELSPETH (to audience): Morvyth is a dear, delightful lovable lazybones, with sweetly coaxing little ways, and a helpless confiding look in her blue eyes. Her fossils form the nucleus of the school museum.

All the girls are now out of bed and dressing. They follow the same procedure: having pulled on their knickers, they remove their nighties and put on white blouses, gymslips, school ties, and black stockings held by garters.

GWEN (to audience): The spiciest character in the form is Fauvette, otherwise known as "The Kipper", and rumoured to be the richest girl in school.

FAUVETTE (to audience): Some of the girls are fearfully down on me because my wealthy parents send me postal orders. They tease me and call me "Proudie" or "Madam Conceit".

Bell rings.

ELSPETH: Oops! Two minutes to go before Assembly. Scooterons-nous this very sec! I'll nip ahead, Fauvette, I'm counting on you to see to it that the Fifth is there on time in full fig! (Elspeth exits.)

FAUVETTE: Strafe the dear old Fifth as far as I'm concerned! Elspeth may be in a rush, but it's not this child's usual way of proceeding!

GWEN: Fauvette!

FAUVETTE (to audience): Interposed Gwen, her dark eyes dancing.

GWEN: Will the Bumble Bee be taking us for English composition?

All three, fully dressed, have come downstage. The dropcloth falls behind them.

FAUVETTE: The Bumble Bee? Great Minerva, how ignorant the new bug is! My poor babe, let me initiate you into the shibboleths of the Fifth. Be it known to you that our respected Head, Miss Beasley, vulgarly known as the Bumble Bee, is among our elect set yclept Lemonade--partly owing to her habit of fizzing over, and partly owing to a certain acid quality in her temper.

GWEN: But why shouldn't I call her the Bumble Bee if I want to?

FAUVETTE: Because, old sport, you mustn't correct your betters.

GWEN: And what makes you better than I am?

MORVYTH (to audience): Sniffed Gwen in her forthright way.

FAUVETTE: Because, frabjous child, your parents are humble folk, whereas mine are bearing the nation's burden on their shoulders.

MORVYTH: Do stow it, Fauvette!

FAUVETTE (to GWEN): Make no mistake, I shall take care to keep my weekly postal order locked up in my desk, in case you snaffle it!

GWEN: I wouldn't touch anything of yours with a pair of tongs!

MORVYTH (to audience): Flared Gwen.

FAUVETTE: And I wouldn't touch anything of yours except with a pair of tongs. You're so unwashed!

GWEN: You old bluebottle!

GWEN throws herself on FAUVETTE. They pummel each other, rolling around on the stage. MORVYTH looks aghast. Suddenly ELSPETH re-enters, looking fierce.

ELSPETH (separating the combatants): Peace, turbulent herd! Fauvette, tell me what happened.

FAUVETTE: Please don't think me a rotten sneak, Elspeth, but Gwen set upon me!

GWEN (hotly): I say ...

MORVYTH (to audience): Interjected Gwen.

ELSPETH: Did you start this imbroglio, Gwen?

GWEN: Great heavens, no, Fauvette egged me on!

ELSPETH: Then let me give you both a word of advice, my lofty Pharaohs. Pride frequently comes before a fall.

ELSPETH seizes Gwen by the ear. Fauvette looks smug.

MORVYTH (to audience): I see breakers ahead.

All four girls freeze in this grouping.

VOICE (female, over public address system): You have now met GWEN, FAUVETTE, MORVYTH, and ELSPETH. At the end of this sketch, one of them will be publicly spanked. By a process of elimination, you, the audience, will decide on the victim. You can now eliminate either Gwen or Fauvette. Please indicate your choice by raising your right hand.

Is it Gwen?

GWEN steps forward from group and faces audience.

Or Fauvette?

FAUVETTE does the same.

(Using whichever name gets the most votes)__________ is hereby exonerated.



BLACKOUT

Next - Scene II


From Hermione's Heart

Thursday, February 11, 2010

The Spanking Olympics

No, we Canadians haven't added a new indoor sport to this year's Winter Olympics. But this picture is on all the Wonder Bread wrappers, specially designed for the 2010 Winter Olympics here in Canada. Their website explains:


We believe that through play, dreams are uncovered.

Interesting thought. I think the reverse can also be true: that our dreams become reality through
our spanking play.

Ron always says - and I wholeheartedly agree - that my head is my primary erogenous zone.

And on a related note, I bought a pair of Olympic mittens last weekend, in support of our athletes.


What do they have to do with our favourite indoor pastime? If you look closely, you'll see that I tucked the price tag into the cuff of one mitten. Here's a closeup:


Who knew that size S&M would be a perfect fit? I take that as a good omen. Canada's going for gold! Let the games begin!


From Hermione's Heart