Spanko Brunch 2.0 #120

A few months ago we discussed the question of why many women are reluctant to spank men. A.J. has asked an add-on question that I would like you to consider today. Although many of us are with men who do not wish to be spanked, it might be fun to consider the possibility anyway, so I encourage everyone to think what your response would be.

Ladies, if he needs a spanking, and you are unwilling or refuse to do the honors for the reasons above, will you allow him or take him, to a woman who will?  A friend?  A pro?  Whomever?

Although A.J. specifically asked for the woman's opinion, I encourage male readers to respond as well, either from their partner's point of view or their own. Leave your response as a comment, and I will publish a summary of our discussion when the weekend is over.

You Completed the Caption

Besides some very clever captions, you gave me stories! Do read on and enjoy some entertaining flights of fancy.

Simon: "Randolph Scott never had this problem."

"I'm going to keep this up until you promise to shave off that ridiculous moustache."

Ronnie: Nobody steals my pie and gets away with it.

Anon 1: You leave my sheep alone, go into town and pay for it like the other men.

Anon 2: Ma had seen the Shorty eyeing her cake through the window, so when she caught him red-handed, she decided she needed to teach him a lesson by making him red-bottomed, as well. After Ma finished walloping the errant cowpoke, he threatened to tell Pa what had happened, but Ma told him he’d better be careful because she was the real boss on the ranch and he didn’t want to get on her bad side.

Shorty apologized profusely and slunk off, knowing he’d have to ride the range for the rest of the afternoon while sitting on his blistered backside. That afternoon, the cattle got loose because Shorty left his post to sit in the stream because he needed to “cool” down. When Pa found out what had happened, and that this was not the first time Ma had overstepped her authority with the ranch hands, he was furious.

That evening, the ranch hands watched with delight as Pa, brandishing the bath brush, led a recalcitrant Ma to the barn. Once inside, he draped his naughty, full-figured bride of 42 years over his lap, raised her dress, lowered her bloomers, and vigorously applied that bath brush to her very ample bare bottom.

Soon the night air was filled with the sounds of smacks, wails and blubbering as Pa let Ma know, in no uncertain terms, who the real boss on this ranch was, and that she was neither too old nor too big for him to put her over his knee and give her a sound spanking whenever she ever needed to be reminded of that fact.

Anon 3: She'd told him he could drop the cake now and leave, or she'd give him a swat for every bite he took. He left a while later with a very sore butt, a very full stomach and a wide grin on his face, telling her that her cooking was so good it had been worth every smack, and that he'd be back again the next time she decided to do some baking.

Anon 4: She'd warned her husband about what would happen the next time she caught him swiping her baked goods, so when she saw him leaning in the window to grab a piece of the cake she'd set there knowing he'd be unable to resist it, she gleefully took the opportunity to follow through on her threat and walloped the daylights out of him, despite his admonition about what he'd do once he got free. Even though she knew she'd pay for her actions later when she'd find herself wiggling and squirming on her husband's lap while he used that same bath brush to set her big, round bare bottom on fire, she took great satisfaction in knowing that he'd be sitting very uncomfortably the whole time.

Sweetspot: Fortunately Mrs. Tucker always kept a bath brush handy for situations such as this.

Fresh cake and a spanking, all in all a good day for Loco McNeil.

Old Bullet Head Bixby had fallen into the trap after all and now it was time for Miss. Ruby's sweet revenge.

The Widow Jones smiled broadly and thought to herself, "Country livin' is simply the best, the entertainment just never ends."

"All right Tumbleweed, now it's my turn to go through the window, so get your shiny butt out here and grab this brush."

"What's you fussing about Kid the last fella I caught stealing my baked goods got it with the buggy whip and he didn't holler half this much."

"Dag nabbit husband I'm going to bust your ass good because here you go spoiling your supper after I've gone to all the trouble of preparing your favorite meal - Soupe de poission, bouletter d'avesnes, followed by tarte tatin served with le quignon finished off with chouquettes and washed down with a glass of fine Bordeaux perhaps Chateau Mouton Rothschld."

Anon 5: Martha and Henry had been married a long time. Their marriage was good, but Martha knew something was missing — something Henry needed to do but hadn’t done for over twenty years — she just didn’t know how to approach him about it. When she saw him leaning in the window to steal a piece of her freshly baked cake, she saw an opportunity, so she grabbed the bath brush and gave him a couple of playful whacks. Henry protested, but didn’t respond the way she wanted, so she whacked him a few more times. This time he vowed that if she kept it up, he’d put her over his knee and use that bath brush to give her a long overdue spanking. That was exactly what Martha wanted to hear. She told him he "wouldn’t dare" and exclaimed that she was "much too old for such nonsense," then she whacked him again.

Henry bellowed that he’d had enough of her shenanigans as he bowed up and extricated himself from the window. Martha knew she might have pushed things too far, so she dropped the brush and made a beeline for the front door, but Henry was quicker. He snatched up the brush, grabbed her by the wrist and dragged her over to the rocking chair. Then, right there on the porch, where anyone passing by could see, he pulled her across his lap, lifted her skirt and pulled down her panties. As he unveiled her large, sumptuous bottom, Henry felt something stirring that had been dormant for quite some time. Martha felt it, too, and did her best to encourage his arousal by seductively wiggling her bottom and squirming around on his lap.

Henry was momentarily mesmerized by Martha’s plump, jiggling white globes, and as his excitement grew, was tempted to let her up and take her to the bedroom, but then he thought about the increasingly bratty behavior she’d been exhibiting lately, and he remembered what his father had told him about dealing with a naughty wife, that sometimes you have to “put business before pleasure.” Henry steeled his resolve, raised the bath brush and brought it down on Martha’s upturned bottom with a resounding smack that echoed across the valley. Martha bucked, kicked and let out a piercing howl. Henry delivered a second hard smack to the same spot, with the same result, and Martha realized, too late, that Henry was not going to give her the playful paddling she’d hoped for, but the serious spanking she desperately needed and secretly craved. Henry kept the smacks coming fast and furious until Martha’s heartfelt squalls led him to believe she had learned her lesson, at least for the moment.

When Henry was finished, he let a sobbing Martha get up from his lap, then he ordered her to go up to the bedroom, strip naked, and stand in the corner with her hands on her head and her crimson bottom on display until he told her otherwise. As Martha turned to go, Henry leaned in, gave her a passionate kiss on her neck, and whispered in her ear what he intended to with her once he joined her in the bedroom. Martha’s face turned as red and hot as her bottom. Henry, satisfied that Martha was at least as worked up as he was, pushed her toward the door and gave her a sharp smack on her still exposed rear end that sent her bounding up the stairs like a giddy bride on her wedding night.

Henry went to put the bath brush back on its hook, but decided it should be displayed in a prominent place in their bedroom where it would serve as a constant reminder for Martha to be on her best behavior, and would be readily available when she wasn’t. Besides, he was certain he could conjure up a reason to attend to his naughty wife’s long neglected bottom again before the night was through. Martha had removed her clothes and was examining her blistered behind in the mirror when she heard Henry start up the steps. She jumped into the corner, winced as she gave her overheated bottom one last rueful rub, placed her hands on her head, and as Henry entered the room and began stripping down, thought how thankful she was that things were once again as they should be … and all because of a stolen piece of cake.

Anon 6: "You still smell like a herd of cattle. "You are going to wish you'd gotten into the stock tank with some soap and this brush."

Hermione: This happens every time I leave the window open. Good thing I have my cowboy swatter.

Friday FUN

Quite by chance, I found some really funny butt-oriented videos. Well, maybe not really by chance. After viewing last week's video, YouTube helpfully made a number of similarly-themed suggestions, and I had a ball checking them out!

So here, for your viewing pleasure, is every high school boy's dream detention.



Sorry about the blurred bum. For a picture that's crystal clear, Complete the Caption.

Complete the Caption

Cowboys spend long days in the saddle and their bottoms take a lot of abuse during the arduous cattle drives. But what has this fellow done to merit additional saddle sores?

Complete the caption by leaving a comment and I will publish your speculations on Saturday.

From the Top Shelf - A Dissertation on the Cane

Today's excerpt is not fiction but fact, taken from a book entitled A Guide to the Correction of Young Gentlemen published by AKS books. It was written in the 1980's by Jacqueline Ophir who has written some excellent works on corporal punishment. Although the treatise refers to 'young gentlemen' there is no reason why the same principles should not hold true for 'young ladies'...or older ones for that matter!

The cane is one of the most important—and most intrinsically severe—of all instruments of punishment, and although it is most commonly found in the schoolroom, there is no reason why it should not be employed, where necessary, for domestic punishments as well. Second only to the birch, the cane stands—in England at least—for the symbol of corporal punishment, in the same way the martinet represents France, the tawse Scotland and the tappette* in the Americas.

Canes are made from a variety of materials, with rattan being the most popular, due to its unique combination of light weight and extreme flexibility. They can also be made from malacca and bamboo - both unsuitable materials in my opinion, since malacca is too 'knobbly' and bamboo is liable to splinter. Canes can also be made from whalebone, a very severe form indeed of this instrument. And, of course, ad hoc ferrules can be shaped very easily from switches cut from any hedgerow: hazel, willow, and young ash plants all being suitable, although only the last named will survive one punishment.

The standard British school cane is universally manufactured from rattan, and is typically supplied with one end already curled into the traditional handle. Lengths vary from about two feet (these are intended to be used across the knee on smaller culprits but I do not think this form of the punishment is ever truly effective) up to about four feet. Canes longer than this will be difficult to control and aim properly and should be rejected (unless the caning is of the judicial type).

The weight of a cane is the important thing and here appearances may be deceptive. Rattan is a very light material and inexperienced governesses not appreciating this are liable to choose their canes on the slender side, reasoning that this will make the strokes more merciful. In fact the reverse is true; a slim, wand-like cane is crueller and liable to cut. Thicker canes better combine the qualities of penetration and "spread", and are less likely to break the skin. I speak here in the context of a caning administered to the bare bottom. If clothing is retained then you may use any cane you like.

It is, as I have said, a severe instrument, and although versatile—it can be used to punish the hands and both the clothed and unclothed bottom—the cane should be used with respect for its considerable powers of penetration. Wrongly used, it can be a vicious implement.

In fact, its widespread adoption within British schools during the last century is a result of mistaken kindness and a certain prudery, mixed well together. Until the middle of the 19th century, the birch reigned supreme, but the application of the birch inevitably means the baring of the bottom; it can be applied under no other conditions - and a certain shyness involved in stripping offenders meant that another instrument, capable of penetrating even the thick material of a boy's workday breeches, had to be employed. For this purpose there is no better implement than the cane—unless it is the riding crop, which is certainly not for use in schoolrooms—and so it became adopted, particularly in state or church schools.

The irony of this of course is that many pedagogues continue to punish the errant on their bare buttocks but using the cane in this way, they are actually punishing with greater severity, stroke for stroke, than with the birch! The result of the mid Victorian prudery is therefore that many naughty boys actually suffer more than once they did—so often the case with ill thought-out "reforms".

The cane, therefore, is one of the few implements that I occasionally administer across the clothed seat. Six or twelve strokes applied with vigour to a tightly-presented target will cause enough distress to expiate most offences.

If I desire to inject a greater degree of shame into a caning, particularly one administered in class, I insist on the removal of trousers, but not necessarily underwear. I retain this option in case the offender misbehaves during the punishment.

Nevertheless it frequently comes about that a culprit will commit offences of such gravity that it becomes necessary to administer the cane on the bare bottom, almost always in private. I usually limit canings of this sort to a maximum of twelve strokes, although I have gone to 24 on a few occasions where very serious offences took place...

Applying the cane across the bare bottom is one way of observing the progress and effect of the punishment, and of checking one's aim. Some culprits have tougher backsides than others, but even a light caning of a few strokes will leave, in addition to the usual blush across the nether regions, intermittent evidence of the rod in the form of visible weals. If the strokes are administered at a slow pace—say one every ten seconds—the caner has time to observe these marks begin to develop and, like a rifleman, can correct the aim accordingly. All strokes should be delivered into as narrow a band as possible, and that area should correspond with the plumpest and best padded part of the posterior.

Administering any sort of caning is a matter of some precision, the attainment of which is generally a matter of practice. In order to be effective at all, it must be administered with a minimum of real force.

I have spoken much already about this excellent implement so here I shall confine myself to observations concerning its use. The cane is a highly penetrating instrument of great potential severity, and care must be taken when administering it; so much is obvious. It is also lighter than it looks. But the important point is its extreme flexibility. During the quarter-second or so of flight the instrument achieves a near-semicircularity in shape. Although it may appear stiff and straight, in practice it is more whiplike. The arm and wrist motion is therefore a complex one. At the beginning of the stroke, the hand leads the tip of the cane; it continues to lead throughout the descent; only at the last moment, after the shortest of follow-throughs, does the wrist halt and reverse direction slightly so that the business end of the cane "catches up" at exactly the right angle to the posterior. The achievement of a good caning action is therefore a matter of some diligence and constant practice.

Another precaution is to take one's stance slightly to the left of the target, perhaps as much as a half pace. This ensures that the tip of the cane, which travels faster than the rest of the instrument during the latter part of the flight, strikes the far buttock at precisely the same instant, and with the same force, as the rest of the cane makes with the near buttock. The result should be a perfect stripe across the broadest part of the bottom. This mark will immediately appear in white as you finish the stroke, then it will fade, to reappear (if it has been a severe stroke) within less than a minute as a thin welt.

I have spoken earlier about limits on the use of the cane. Feeble strokes merely tap the skin. Savage blows can cut it. Both are to be deplored. The result of a sound caning should be a welted bottom, certainly—if the behind is not vividly marked then the punishment has been too mild and will be too rapidly forgotten—but not a scarified one. That is simple brutality.

The cane should hum or whistle in the stroke and fall across the target with a sharp snap, like a toy pistol. There should be a pause between strokes, say a minimum of ten seconds.

Beware of canes that are too long. While a long cane whips-in satisfactorily, it is harder to control, and the stray six inches at the end may cause the further buttock to be punished more severely than its twin. Standing well to the left of the target is one cure, but on the whole it is best to use a slightly shorter weapon, and to strike slightly harder.

When a culprit is bending over in the conventional position, do not make the mistake of shaping your stroke with too great a downward component. The chances are that you may hit the base of the spine, or the cane will fall at an awkward, grazing angle, or you may punish the upper half of the buttocks and leave the lower, more sensitive, portion, unscathed. Take a horizontal or even slightly upwards aim, draw the cane back slowly within the same arc, then whip the forearm and wrist smartly through from one side to the other, keeping your eyes on the exact spot you are aiming for. Do not look up from this spot until you have completed the stroke. If the bottom has been bared beforehand, observe the mark and compare it to your point of aim, then adjust the next stroke accordingly.

A traditional way of limiting the amount of force that may be applied is to tuck a large book—say, the Bible—under your punishing arm and retain it there throughout the caning. A little experimentation will show that it is impossible to use the shoulder and upper arm muscles without letting the book fall. You are constrained to wrist and forearm, which is exactly as it should be. An even greater error is to be over harsh. The difference between the lightest cut that may be given, and the severest, is not large; and if greater severity is required it is safer to increase the number of strokes, or to apply some additional measure, such as baring the bottom, or administering the punishment in public, or all three.

Canings are well nigh impossible to administer in most of the spanking postures (over the knee etc) due to the length of the weapon. They must be inflicted with the culprit bent over (or if necessary held) for example touching toes, across a chair, a desk, the end of the bed. I do not favour any of the kneeling positions since this makes the angle of the body too acute for such a penetrating instrument as the cane; a culprit bending over and clasping shins, with knees straight and feet together is presented at precisely the right angle.

There being a natural formality about a caning, this tone should be maintained both before and after the punishment proper, wherever it is inflicted and under whatever conditions of dress. At the every least I make a caned offender write an imposition. On occasion, when trousers or pants have been taken down for example, I send the culprit shuffling to the corner to further shame and isolation, garments strewn around the ankles and hands on head.

A culprit may either be caned on the spot, as soon as possible following the commission of the offence or be sent to another room to await the punisher's arrival. The culprit may be ordered to fetch the cane from a closet - obliging a choice to be made from a considerable and varied collection.

Alternatively, of course, while the culprit, already positioned and appropriately stripped, waits in suspense and fear, you may coolly take your pick, assessing each cane at leisure until certain you have chosen the correct instrument for the task in hand. There is no hurry after all, and the unexpected waiting time adds to the fear and suspense of the overall punishment.

* I have never heard of a tappette or tapette. The various translations I found for this French word  are mousetrap, homosexual (slang), carpet beater and fly swatter, so take your pick.

Recap: Spanko Brunch 2.0 for April 3

Have your reactions after a spanking ever been noticed by someone else?

Anon 1: My spankee, after our first meeting, about an hour after departing, started rubbing her bottom at a gas station while filling up, and caught herself. It was a low population area, so there was only one other customer who did not appear to notice.

arched one: Your question could be very embarrassing. I wish I could add to the experience but it has never happened to me.

Bonnie: This problem arises occasionally. Randy loves to go out on the town while I am in a freshly spanked state. Or perhaps, it's that he likes to spank me before we're supposed to go out. Either way, the answer is yes.

I have developed a standard cover story. If asked, I respond, "Oh, it's just a touch of sciatica." I don't have this ailment, but claiming it dismisses any suspicion of paddle burn. If Randy is present at such times, he often just stands there with a big cat-ate-the-canary grin as if to silently suggest, "No, it isn't." Observers are left to make up their own minds.

Wilma: Not reacted, but one Canada Day my shorts rode up my legs to expose a angular bruise on my upper thigh. A good friend of ours, who is definitely someone I would refer to as an Alpha Male, commented after many other friends did, " I have had those type of marks on me, after my Mom whacked me with a Hot Wheels track as a kid". He took the conversation away from me, which made me very grateful, but at the same time, made me realize, oh HE KNOWS! LOL

Jenn: As I've said before, I am a runner, so I often say "Ow" as I am sitting down. So it's not suspicious at all if I say "Ow".

Ronnie: Have winced a few times sitting down to dinner in restaurants (P often likes to spank me before we go out) Also have been quite fidgety when sitting on hard seats having dinner at friends. If our hosts noticed they didn't say anything.

Fondles: I've fidgeted and/or rearranged myself when out at a restaurant / cafe, but i don't think anyone's noticed, or if they did, I didn't realise it. But I'm often walking/backing up into things and have had bruises on my thigh / calf / arm often enough that if a friend mentioned it I would probably be able to get away with a story about bumping into the table edge or something.

Hermione: It often happens that after a spanking I am sitting on a hard wooden bench during a performance of the singing group I am in. Just yesterday, in fact, my bottom was still sore after a spanking the night before. I grabbed one of the cushions that are usually lying around (some members have arthritis and need them) and sat on it. No one cared, but if anyone had commented I would have said that I hurt my back.

There you have it!

Spanko Brunch 2.0 #119

Welcome one and all to our regular weekly gathering, where everyone has an opportunity to discuss some aspect of spanking. This week's question was suggested by an anonymous reader, and it is mainly directed at spankees, but spankers might be able to contribute some observations too.

After a spanking, have you ever done anything in public—like reacting when sitting or rubbing your bottom—which was inadvertently witnessed, and how did you explain it away?

I'm looking forward to reading your responses to this one! Once everyone has had a chance to speak, I will publish a summary of our discussion.