Monday, August 31, 2015

Recap: Spanko Brunch 2.0 for August 30

This week we discussed deliberately provoking the spanker in your relationship. Here's what you said:

Bonnie: I doubt that approach would work with Randy. When I want him to spank me, I dress in a manner that he finds attractive, cuddle up next to him, and caress him with my hands. Most times, one thing leads to another, and a good spanking is part of the bargain.

Another favorite non-verbal request involves dropping an object on the floor in front of where he is sitting and then bending from the waist to retrieve it. Hiking up my skirt heightens the effect.

I also place a spanking implement in plain sight or simply hand it to him.

On such occasions, we cautions me, "Be careful what you wish for." An hour later, when I'm sitting gingerly on a very sore bottom, but feeling relaxed and satisfied, I know my wish came true.

Downunder Don: Because our spankings are not "punishment" but are usually a reward, herself never has to act up or misbehave to receive a spanking. All she has to do is ask.

Nina: Hi Hermione, I think I have not done that, because punishments are so not awesome. If I want the good girl spankings I have to be good, so I rather try to be good.

abby: I have not, in a long time, tried to 'poke the bear' so to speak. Maintenance happens every week, has for about 10 years. It is a hard spanking, and I have no desire for a harder one. We also have a Friday Play date, so that is pretty much 2 guaranteed spanking a week...not counting the spontaneous ones...and the passing smacks on my bottom.

Wilma: When we first started ttwd, I had a conversation with a blogger ( who no longer blogs) about her 'testing' her husband, by 'bratting' I suppose you'd call it. Barney told me right then, "If you ever purposely do that, we are done with ttwd". I don't think that would be the case anymore, but I have never purposely done it. I think for me the 'attention' would not feel authentic if I manipulated the situation in order to get spanked. That would be the main reason, but also because punishment spankings are NOT something I enjoy, physically or mentally.

Roz: I admit I have done this in the past with mixed responses. As Willie said, when it has resulted in a spanking it didn't always feel 'right' and I didn't always feel I got what I needed/wanted.

Blondie: There were times in the beginning where I would "test" Ty by misbehaving and seeing if he would follow through on a punishment. But when I finally realized that I was an adult and he was not my caretaker, I stopped misbehaving. Nobody likes punishment spankings at my house. Luckily there are plenty of spankings around here that I don't need to act out to get punished. Fun spankings are always the best and are available whenever time allows.

Simon: Like Downunder Don I don't really receive punishment spankings as such. There have been what I call stress relief punishments, Sometimes she just needs to take her stress out on something and that can be my poor bottom.

Dr. Ken: I've known quite a few women who have deliberately misbehaved, knowing what my response would be to that. Not all women want to just ask for a spanking--some of them like to "earn" it. Deliberately misbehaving is one way to earn it. it's done in the spirit of spanking fun, of course--the result is more "mock punishemnt", or "funishment" than anything else. The result is still a very red and stinging bottom, of course. I don't think disappointing me would work--we'd both wind up feeling bad about it, and I don't know that a spanking would clear the air....

arched one: Between punishment, maintenance and just because spankings my bottom is well attended to and I do like maintenance and just because but hate punishment so no I don't act up.

sub hub: Hermione, thank for the shout-out and for posing this question. I thing for most of us that are the submissive one in our respective relationships, we've all done this from time to time whether we want to admit it or not. I would suggest that when it happens, it isn't necessarily a conscious thought because we all instinctively know that misbehaving on purpose, just to receive the disciplinary attention from our Dominant is wrong. That being said, sometimes we just crave the intimate attention that comes with being spanked and when that happens, we might not know that we are doing it.

Thank you again for posting the question on your awesome blog! It's quite and honor.

It was my pleasure!

Susan: Once, never again. We had friends for a party; I had a blue satin dress - very short flared skirt, and just covering me on top; sexy but tarty! D warned me that if I wore it I would get spanked. I put on a more demure dress, and he went down to our guests. I felt like a spanking that evening, and quickly changed back into the blue dress before going down to be met by whistles, but an angry glare from D. A while later, D said to everyone, ' I told Susan if she wore that dress, she would get a spanking, so now's the time' .

Oh no, not what I had intended; not in front everyone; I had thought of a nice OTK later on, but it was to be worse. He steered me over to the sofa, bent me over the arm, sitting down to hold me in place, My tiny skirt had flipped up, to show my bare bottom, with only a minute thong.He took a leather paddle from his pocket, handed it to Jeff, 'You start, three from each of you". Everyone was going to spank me - twelve by three made thirty six whacks on my bare bum. Much later I scrambled back to my feet, my bottom blazing. I stood rubbing the poor thing, as everyone clapped and cheered. Our guests left at last, and I found myself where I had planned, over D's lap for a sound but thrilling hand spanking on my still very tender cheeks.

Ronnie: Oh yes I have and do misbehave and cheek P to get spanked. It adds to the fun. I don't purposely disappoint P but I know I have in the past and got spanked for it.

Hermione: Provocation would definitely not get the the spanking I crave. Spankings are rewards, not punishments around our house. It's much better to ask for one, or simply wait until the appointed day and time.

I'm always delighted to receive a suggestion for a brunch topic, so if you have a burning question in mind, please email me or leave a comment. See you all next week!
From Hermione's Heart

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