You Completed the Caption

These enthusiastic dancers have got the Oktoberfest spirit, or maybe they've been into the spirits.
Here's what you said:

Simon: The fight scene was eventually cut from the finished version of "The Sound of Music".

Ricky: Yo-doo-lay-ee-oo . . .The joy of a good harvest.
Happy Thanksgiving, everyone!

Bas: Ouch, those damned Lederhosen hurt my hands. I’m sure glad Gretl is not wearing anything like that under her Dirndl.

GaryNTboy: Hans, you fool. I told you that was a bee hive and not a pinata.

Six of the best: These beerguzzling Octoberfest men are singing and dancing to this song. "Tonight I'm going to get a lass, and spank her enjoyably on her ASS". Oooom Pa Pa.

Prefectdt: The Bavarians had discovered that mutual spanking was a good method of getting a Jedward hairstyle, without the expense of going to a hairdresser.

Joey: How long do we have to do this silly dance before we can tap the keg?

Bonnie: "When Otto first suggested bringing his synthesizer to Oktoberfest, I was concerned that something like this might happen."

Lady Koregan: Rules against breakdancing at the traditional polkafest were strictly enforced.

Young Lady: The Von Trapps were always in awe of their liberated cousins.

Hermione: The blackflies were especially bad in the Alps this year.


Happy Thanksgiving to all my fellow Canadians, eh?

Complete the Caption

It's October, and time for Oktoberfest. Drinking beer, eating bratwurst, singing, dancing, spanking  and who knows what else?

Complete the caption by leaving a comment and I will publish your submissions in the next post.

Friday FAIL

In Canada we will be celebrating Thanksgiving Day on Monday, and here's what every busy cook needs to make the meal special. An inflatable turkey.

It's available here,  and this is the product description:

This inflatable turkey, complete with an oven-perfect skin, is almost good enough to eat.

The next time you invite people over for Thanksgiving, serve them this turkey first and watch their horrified expressions ... but be sure to have real turkey or they'll probably stuff you with it.

If eating turkey isn't your thing, there's meatloaf

For dessert, how about a lovely cupcake?

Or a nice slice of fruitcake.

Yum yum.

A Little Bratting

Usually I'm not one for bratting or coming up with smart remarks during a spanking, but maybe I've been visiting Erica's blog a little too often. I just felt naughty enough last weekend to try it. I didn't plan anything; it just happened.

First of all, when we got to the bedroom and I was ordered to bend over, I noticed that the bedcover was crumpled and pulled back to expose the blanket and pillows underneath.

"What exactly did you have in mind?" I asked.

"That was Fluffy's doing," explained Ron. Fluffy considers our bed his daytime resting place, and often makes a nest of blankets and sheets for his own comfort. I also saw one of Fang's toys on the bed. Obviously the two of them had been having a good time.

After my bottom was bare, I leaned forward, grabbed the fleecy teddy and held it tight against my bare cheek to protect it. It didn't help. Ron grabbed the toy and tossed it across the room then got to work.

He started with the dogging bat and it seemed like a pretty gentle start.

"Is that the best you can do?"  I asked, trying to say it the way I thought Erica would.

Bad move. Ron tossed the bat aside, grabbed the carpet beater and began to apply it vigorously.

"Is that better?"

"Ow, ow, yes!"

"Am I doing a good job now?"

"Ow, wonderful..OW!"

The marks from that thing were still visible the next day, and the next. I think I'll give up bratting.

Wednesday WIN

This is an example of great advertising. Advertising Agency: BBDO Berlin designed matchbooks with a striking strip right on the panty. It just feels great to “light your fire”.

Found on BoredPanda.com

Corrie Bottoms

There haven't been too many references to spanking on Coronation Street of late, but the episode I watched last night had a brilliant one that I just have to share. First thought, here's one that aired several months ago.

Sally is unlocking the knicker factory door because the owner is taking a few days off.

"I'll be cracking the whip around here," she boasted. The eyebrows of several workers went up quickly.

"I didn't know you were a dominatrix, Sal," Joanne remarked

"there's a lot you don't know about me," was the quick reply.

---

Gloria, a pain in the butt new character on the Street, is the former owner of a bar in Spain and is related to several other characters, including the girlfriend of the owner of the Bistro. Since she's "family" she goes to Gail's house and asks for the keys to the Bistro. The double entendre in this scene is priceless.

Gloria: I thought I might come and do a bit of bottoming. [For non-British readers, that means a good cleaning.]
Gail: I'm the cleaner, Gloria. I bottom.
Gloria: I know, but you didn't see the cleanliness standard of my bar. Wait till you see a sponged bottom.

Kevin interrupts them as they stand on the doorstep. He's collecting money for a couple with a new baby.

Kevin: We're having a whip-round for Tyrone and Kirsty. 
Gloria: Whip-rounds. They always make me think of funerals and prison.
Kevin: This is for the baby.
Gloria: I can't help it. When you've been a gangster's moll you get used to your menfolk disappearing.

She snatches the keys from Gail's hand and heads off towards the Bistro.

Kevin: She was a gangster's moll?
Gail: With a sponge bottom, apparently.

Gail is not amused.

From the Top Shelf - Pride and Promiscuity II

Today I have a second selection from Pride and Promiscuity - the Lost Sex Scenes of Jane Austen, by Arielle Eckstut. It is taken from Pride And Prejudice, and concerns two of the minor characters: Elizabeth's friend Charlotte, and her pompous husband, Mr. Collins, who is a slave to his patron, Lady Catherine de Bourgh.

In this deleted scene, Lady Catherine has left a parcel for Charlotte, containing a discarded dress fifteen years out of date. Charlotte puts the dress on over her clothing and pretends to be Lady Catherine, mimicking her voice and mannerisms.

Charlotte smiled complacently and moved — as if in response to the real Lady Catherine — to snap up the paper and string used to tie up the parcel. On doing so, she was surprised to find another object still inside the packaging. Charlotte reached her hand in and pulled out a riding crop. It was old and bruised, and bits of leather had worn loose from excessive use.

Charlotte examined the crop and slapped her leg with it, only to let out a little cry on realizing how effective it remained. Her liveliness increased with her new discovery and Charlotte continued her mime...

"Mr. Collins, I am in the drawing room," she scolded, in imitation of Lady Catherine.

Mr. Collins entered the drawing-room near breathless, explaining—"Lady Catherine, my most earnest apologies, I do not know how it is possible, but I did not hear—" He stopt suddenly as his eye beheld, not Lady Catherine, but his own lady standing in a manner most entirely unknown to him and yet wholly familiar; for the first time in his life, Mr. Collins was unable to speak... "I have been very remiss."

"That is putting it mildly, Mr. Collins. I am only an occasional advocate of severe punishment, yet I believe one must learn that there are consequences to one's actions... Mr. Collins, I always speak my mind and I will not hesitate now. One such as you must learn from your mistakes the hard way. Position yourself, at one, on your hands and knees. Any hesitation will most certainly result in a most painful consequence... Are you prepared to suffer for your stupidity and inadequacy as a husband, cleric, and Englishman?" Charlotte asked with indignation.

Mr. Collins whimpered a quiet assent...attempted a response, but was stopped by the crack of the whip against his backside. For a few solitary moments, as the sensation of burning and stinging was most felt, silence ensued. Each party entered their own private rhapsody, never to be matched with such intensity again. Each felt their power or powerlessness (as appropriate) rise to unaccountable heights. And each felt a resulting quiver and a warmth so penetrating that their breath raced in unison.

"I have been very, very bad! May I please have another!" poured from his lips... With each request for further punishment, Charlotte bore down all the more mercilessly upon his flesh until both came to a sort of climax neither had ever observed in the other, and quite possibly had never experienced unto themselves.

 In case you haven't already figured it out, this is a spoof. There are no newly-discovered manuscripts of Jane Austen's deleted sex scenes. Pride and Promiscuity was published on April 1 as a very clever hoax.