Dan: I have gotten slightly more open about it. There are three people who know both who I am and that I am in this lifestyle. But, I should note that two are people I met through this lifestyle and blogging about it. The relationships were anonymous at the beginning and the identities were revealed after substantial trust developed. To date, there is only one person who knows and whose relationship with me predates me getting into this.
QBuzz: A few of our friends probably know we're a bit kinky but as far as I know nobody knows how much we both love spanking!
Shell: Though we've been spanking for 6 years -- I only recently worked up the courage to come out of my shell via this corner of blogland (and this corner only). Blogging for me is a HUGE first step in admitting "out loud" that this is us. It's been very therapeutic, and you all have been great in encouraging and welcoming me. This community is so important. I'm not sure I could ever share the "real me" w/my vanilla friends.
Katie: It’s wonderful to be a part of a community where you can talk openly about your spanking relationship, as well as the dive into greater intimacy. Unfortunately this lifestyle is not something that I can share with vanilla folks. They wouldn’t understand. I don’t think that it would go over well... especially with the Me Too movement. People wouldn’t easily understand.
My kids are onto us in various stages, I believe, but they certainly don’t know the details, and I’d never bring it up. Our girls know that I blog. Our older daughter asked if she could read it, and after one second of thought, I asked her to please respect my privacy. She agreed. I think it’s better to have my own space. The community here is special because we can talk about this.
Sir Wendel: Our spanking interest remains secret. Pretty sure the Misses’ sister knows but I still would not mention it.
Baxter: No there is no one outside of our marriage that knows my wife spanks me. Blogland is the only place I say anything and then no one knows my identity or anything about me and that anonymity is how I like it. But I wonder sometimes if there are couples on my street or anywhere nearby that spank also. Not that I will ever find out, but just thinking that somewhere in Chicagoland, there are couples right now spanking each other is a warming thought.
NoraJean: Other than here and with friends 'behind the blog' I don't think we could ever share. I find myself wishing I could but I don't think there would be any understanding amongst any of our family and vanilla friends, of what goes on in this dynamic. I often wonder how the seemingly more open BDSM community does it with their out in the community munches and such but then again, there are portions of the community that are somewhat 'public' amongst themselves.
Heather: My best friend knows. Partly because she admitted to being into it first and that sort helped me come out of my shell and tell my husband about my interest.
I've recently met a person who is very open about her sexuality. She has mentioned on separate occasions that she is a masochist and likes pain. Then she mentioned that she is into impact play. I figured if she could be open about it, I could too. So I admitted that I am into spanking. It was a big step to tell someone I haven't been lifelong friends with.
It's a lot easier to tell someone of a like mind, then a non-spanko.
Peter: Anna, my wife has been spanking me for almost ten years.Until very recently it was our secret. Last fall while on a cruise with our best friends, I got out of hand and Anna when we got back to our cabin, took my belt to my ass and gave me a much deserved spanking. The next day the husband and one of my buddies mentioned while he and i were walking around the deck that the
next time Anna spanks my ass perhaps we should make sure the door that leads to the balcony off our stateroom is shut.
At first I freaked, trying to replay what my wife or I might have said. All I could think of was as usual, when she punishes she does it till she sees tears. I was sobbing that nite. I blushed and he patted my back. "It was hot " he said. " It made me hard. Was like having a private porno."
Since then we have talked about it and he told me how hot he felt it was. Knowing he found it arousing made me hot. It is also great to be able to talk about it with someone.
Roz: Outside of this community I wouldn't share my interest in spanking. The only situation I can see where I may possibly share would be if a friend confided in me that they have an interest in spanking.
Bonnie: With very few exceptions, our kinky proclivities remain our secret. Spankings, for us, are a part of sex, and we view that as private.
Our daughter knows, but she does not want to know. La-la-la-la-la-la. Poor kid.
Barrel: While we use all forms of spanking for discipline and punishment, it always culminates with love making, so we are not out there too far...yet. These brunches, and more importantly the family that attend, help our confidence grow in our lifestyle.
My wife has been spanking me for 39 years. Until the internet, we were clueless about this kink and believed we were just weird. Now, we feel quite at home here, and only here. While some of our friends know of our passion for lingerie, they don’t know more than that. I’d like to be out a little further but won’t go alone. I am not known to anyone, except for one person (Hugs back at ‘ya ;<) )
Ronnie: Outside of this community our spanking activities remain our secret.
Yorkie: Our spanking activities are entwined with our sex life and are therefore private.
Hermione: When I was much, much younger I would tell the odd person that I was a masochist, but it wa always in a joking way. Now, I am very comfortable writing about spanking on this and other blogs, but neither Ron nor I have ever shared our preference with anyone else. That probably won't ever happen.
Thank you all for joining the discussion this week.
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