Recap: Spanko Brunch 2.0 for June 27

How do punishment spankings differ, and what are your feelings about them?

Baxter: I only get spanked when I ask for it and thankfully my wife does her best. But at least once, I would like a full on spanking as in being taken over the knee of a strong woman who can restrain me and strap and paddle my bottom hard, with the result of not being able to sit comfortably for days. The other scenario I think about is being restrained on a bed, legs and arms tied to the corner, bottom raised over some pillows and again, strapped and paddled hard. That might qualify for what you refer to as a punishment spanking. 

Jeanie: I read your brunch topic of punishment spankings and my heart began to beat faster.

I get spanked a lot, mostly fun and playful, all too brief, little reminders of who we are. My boyfriend & I also enjoy spankings for foreplay. There is a world of difference between all these and punishment spankings. 

I know what offences will earn punishment. On the order of once every two weeks or so, I'll just feel this overwhelming need for a really good (meaning hard) spanking and do something about it. (When I press that key at the end of an Amazon.com order that says "finalize purchase" I'll say to myself, "that's gonna leave a mark..." The majority of my punishments come from spending money exorbitantly.) My boyfriend lets me know that I'm going to get a punishment spanking early in the day, to be administered later that day, usually before bedtime. That way I have to think about what's coming. On more than one occasion, I was instructed to strip naked before dinner, so that I could anticipate what awaited after dessert. 

Playful spankings occur on the spur of the moment, anywhere around the house (or beyond). Punishment spankings are more formal, ritualized, and almost always happen in our bedroom. 

Playful spanking often start on the seat of my clothing, and the clothes are gradually removed. But punishment spankings are given to me when I'm naked. When I assume the OTK position, my lover will take a lot of time caressing, telling me how pretty my pristine buttocks are and how it hurts him to have to punish me as hard as is needed. 

Playful and/or sexy spankings may be sound and stinging, but punishment spankings always are. Our safeword is not allowed during these sessions, I must trust that my Top knows what I need. Punishment spankings start with the hand, but almost always continue with the use of an implement. Given that I enjoy leather implements and hate wooden ones, the weapon of ass destruction usually employed for the second half of my punishment spankings is a large wooden hairbrush. The paddling goes on until I'm contrite, usually crying, sometimes absolutely balling. We both know that I will be bruised after punishment. In about a day, what I call "universes" of colored bruises blossom across my bottom. 

Because spanking is erotic, you would think I'd get turned-on by playful spankings much more than from punishments, but this isn't true. I get aroused by both. So after I'm thoroughly consoled, my tears are dried, and I'm back in his good graces, we'll transition to make-up sex (the best kind, in my opinion).

Bonnie: We do, and yet, we don't. What I mean is that I crave the corporal punishment headspace, rituals, and spankings. The reality is that I don't do anything seriously wrong and if I did, that's not how Randy and I would handle it. I guess you could call it role play, but I can attest that the pain is definitely not pretend.

There are several differentiators that characterize these spankings. I am usually naked. The swats are always harder, often faster, and seem to continue longer. The spanking implements are more severe wood and leather, and sometimes multiple implements are applied. I am more likely to be restrained. Use of a plug, dildo, or vibrator during the spanking is more likely. The banter has a more disciplinary tone. By the time he finishes, I am emotionally drained and my bottom is extremely sore. Sometimes, I have to serve corner time and/or pose for photos.

After I return to Earth, thanks to loving aftercare from Randy, I feel relaxed, content, renewed, and happy. And ow!

Joe: No punishment spankings here, I only get spanked when I ask for it and some times it will start slow and easy, other times fast and hard with no warm up but that ends petty quickly. Then the spanking turns erotic as I am always naked for my spanking face down and legs spread wide, swats to my bottom are intermingled with some very erotic touching and fondling, the contrast in sensations in incredible. I have asked for longer harder punishment type spankings and being tied down but has not happened yet.

Anon: My wife does not spank me for fun. There are 2 types she uses, a maintenance or a punishment spanking.

A maintance I get when I have behaved well enough not to get a punishment version for over a week and is, relatively, bearable. I do not have to stand in the punishment naughty corner, she just lowers my pants, over her lap I go and after her statement that she is proud of me that I behaved so well but that she wants to keep it that way and therefore, to “support” me, she is going to spank me. Lighter then a punishment version but boy do I feel it and I am kicking my legs and she makes sure I “feel the need” to keep behaving myself. Sitting down is hard for a day or so.

The punishment version does its job, corner time and all but the worst is that she will spank me with her hand, followed by hairbrush, paddle and finally the strap. Trust me; she shows me who is in charge and that misbehaving (according to her rules) will be dealt with severely. Since nobody can hear us I always make a lot of noise and I always end up crying and sitting down is almost impossible for 3 days or so.
I hate all her spankings but, at the same time, I love her for administering these punishments since our marriage went from not so good to perfect.

Roz: We did used to have punishment spankings. They were often harder with multiple implements used and were also often longer. The discussion during such spankings was also of a disciplinary nature. One of the biggest differences was the feelings and emotions involved. These weren't light-hearted spankings for fun. There was also a lot more after care and reassurance.

Jack: Punishment spankings the norm for this family. My wife knew even while dating that I needed direction and direction it is. I say I'm sorry, beg her not to spank but she wins all the time. It is mostly done in the bedroom, depending on what I did, I could be told to undress and wait, or she will just bare my bottom, scold me, and then a sound over her lap spanking with the bath brush. My life is better for the spankings, they hurt, no sex involved, always a very traditional bare bottom spanking over the lap, I just dread that bath brush, it talks very loud and at times for a long time.

Barrel: We do punishment style spankings but not for actual punishment. I want, and my wife is learning to enjoy, severe and intense spankings. We do them about every three months, with planning and discussions leading up to them, to heighten the mental turmoil I go through.

I am always restrained over the bench at the foot of our bed. Four restraints are used: hands under the bench with soft ropes that extend to the opposite side and tie on top of my back; a nylon belt secures my waist; two Velcro straps at mid thigh connecting under the bench so when tightened, pull my knees apart for better access to my inner thighs, and ankle ropes to the bottom legs of the bench. I stack pillows in the middle of the bench and cover with pool towels since I sweat and drool during these extended thrashings.

My wife uses a crop and tawse but prefers a leather strap I crafted out of an old shoulder strap from a carry on garment bag. She wields that strap as hard and accurately back hand as forehand. She is improving her use of our two canes but still does not apply them hard enough to impart the telltale weals and stripes that last for weeks.

This last session was an extended one over 45 minutes and she offered me sips of water through a straw during an implement change.. I thought that was a nice touch.

Like Bonnie wrote, afterwards I am content, grounded and in a calm state. We are planning a session as soon as I finish two doctor appointments next month.

Wendel: We spank each other for offences but do not consider the spankings as discipline. For us a spanking is fun. We like to give and receive them. When the Misses misbehaves I might take her to the kitchen for her spanking. The Misses might tell me to bend over the end of the bed for a whipping. Any protest before, during or after the spanking is just to add to the excitement. However the actual spankings are real and the bottom will be sore for hours.

KDPierre: Punishment spankings are definitely a big part of what we do, and for me these can come from various sources. It's part of why I have a blog, because the differences, feelings, nuances, personalities involved, etc. are too complicated for clarity in a single paragraph.

The simplest distillation I can manage for your brunch would be to say they are different more for their tone and intent than the mechanics involved. Looking at other answers, you can see how this makes sense. There are people who create a very real experience without using actual offences. My experiences are probably not that much different from theirs in terms of what happens. It's very much the psychology of being accountable in this way and then being punished as an adult, by another adult for something quite real that challenges our pride, independence, and personal views on equality, authority, and a whole array of things. I do believe that this can be a bit too much for some, and probably why even avid spankos often shy away from taking things this far in their relationship. It's certainly not for everyone, and certainly not always easy even for those who desire such a lifestyle. 

Rosco: Irene and I have never used the term "punishment spanking" or "maintenance spanking" as some do. She'll sometimes say I need "discipline" or to learn to behave.

If she is seriously upset with me, spanking would not be on her mind - we would work it out like adults. I get spanked for small things like not washing and folding her panties or making a mess with coffee grounds.

She does like to make it hurt. Most of my spankings take place over the course of an hour or so leading up to cunnilingus and intercourse. But it is not uncommon for her to spank me at other times, sometime before making me take an afternoon nap. It's kind of sexy when she does it and it helps me relax and sleep a bit.

Hermione: Wow! You are all making me jealous :) All my fantasies are about being spanked as punishment for naughty behaviour, but the reality is far different. Our spankings are strictly for foreplay, and Ron does not do roleplay. I imagine that if I were to receive a real punishment spanking, I would feel very helpless and totally controlled by the one whose knee I was bent over. I would end up being very sore and feeling very contrite and sorry for my behaviour.

That's all for this time.Stay safe!