Monday, November 17, 2008

A Lemming Again

After hearing over and over from Grace, PK, and Eva how effective a backscratcher--they fondly refer to it as a BS--can be in the hands of the right man, I gave in and bought one.
The last time I succumbed to peer pressure and bought an implement, I was very sorry, at least for the first few times it was used on my backside. But this time things will be different.
I hope.
I didn't actually set out to buy a BS. But while I was browsing in my favourite thrift store, I just happened to wander by the shelves filled with wooden odds and ends. And there it was! So I snatched it up and hurried to the checkout, before I had a chance to reconsider.
In case you're wondering, it looks like one of these:

Brrr! I can't imagine owning a whole collection of them. Can you, Grace?
So, it's at home, hidden under the clutter on my desk. The man who wields the implements doesn't know about it yet. I'm open to suggestions as to how I should go about revealing it to Ron.
Should I:
  • sneak up behind him, scratch his back with it, then tell him about its other possible use?
  • casually lay it on the bedside table before a spanking, and let him figure it out?
  • put a ribbon on it and say honey, I bought you a present?
  • leave it on top of the clutter on my desk where he will find it the next time he's looking for a pen that works?
  • bury it at the bottom of the bag of donations for the thrift shop and forget about it?

What do you think I should do?


Mina said...

Put the ribbon on it and leave him in no doubt of your desire.

Best of luck!


Paul said...

Hermione, I've heard that back scratchers are a bitter sweet implement.
I wish you joy of it.
Warm hugs,

Ms. Cassandra (Sandy) Park said...

I don't know how you could tell him. Maybe you could blog about it...

K said...

Well, if you truly want him to use it, I'd put it the ribbon on it and give it to him with a naughty grin. If, on the other hand, you don't think you'll enjoy it, then toss it somewhere and forget about it until he finds it. My lemming moment resulted in a bamboo bath brush that has to be used very lightly. I don't think I'll have any trouble resisting any BS. ;)

Serenity Everton said...

Maybe Santa could drop off an early stocking of surprises? You know, just for Ron?

Kallisto said...

Tie on the ribbon and give it to him. You might love it, and wish you had done it sooner. Or you might hate it, and then is the time to hide it!



Christmas isn't far off, wrap it up as a stocking filler. And then worry about it for a month and a half (evil laugh).


Lady Koregan said... how did I let that one slip by? LOL. Oh right, because I already have several.

They seem to be rather popular at our store as well, they never do stay on the self long when we get one.

BSs seem almost as popular as our hand shaped fly swatters...but that's another story.

I have used back strackers. They can be quite stingy, in fact they can get very intense quickly if used in the same spot at a rapid pace. They are so light it's just too easy to swing them again and again.

They can break if swung to hard, though.

But mostly they are good but ouchie fun.

Personally, I think just slyly leaving it on the side of the bed is the best approach. No need for the bow. That way, you know it's probably coming but not knowing when will build a nice thrill of anticipation. Hm...seems to me that anticipating a spanking can sometimes be almost as much fun as the spanking itself.

Ms. Betty

Constance said...

Let him catch you using it to selfishly scratch your own back. That way he gets an implement and a reason to spank you all at the same time.

PK said...

Ignore everything above - everything! The only answer is "bury it at the bottom of the bag of donations for the thrift shop and forget about it". I am telling you the truth! We have two of the hateful things, thanks to Eva's Adam, Grrrrrrrr!! Mine are going on Grace's bon-fire!

But I do understand the lemmiing thing, I have a hair brush because of Cassie!

You'll find out I'm right!!!!


pmduo said...

I vote for laying it casually on the bedside table. I'm sure he'll figure it out easily! I have to agree with Paul - it is bittersweet and I'm often tempted to hide mine. But it is a lovely sting that I enjoy for quite some time afterwards! Good luck & have fun!

Anonymous said...

I think you should on top of the desk. Let Ron find it and "figure out" what he could do with it. ^_^ (I tend to prefer that for myself, at least.)

Anonymous said...

Hm...I'd probably leave it for him to find on your desk...perhaps even with a small note attached. I am not so good at taking subtle hints myself, being a guy and all ;-)

Brambleberry Blush said...

I think you'll be sorry you ever came up with this idea! Ben has a bs that he really uses for his back, so it's always laying around the house somewhere--easy to grab and swat me with it. It hurts! Good luck with that.


Scunge said...

I agree with Carly and PK get rid of it! The only time I have ever used my safeword RED was with the backscratcher not even the EVIL plastic has caused me to shout RED!

Apple said... also have got such a back scretcher but we never used it for a spanking....should change that, I think!

Kisses Apple

Apple said...

wanna add that MY saveword is RED, too....Kisses Apple

I´m curious to know how many of us have the same one!

Hermione said...

Here's the tally of your suggestions:

Mina, Kallisto and K like the romantic ribbon approach.

K, Mark and Dragonamge think I should let him accidentally find it. Not on my desk, he won't. It attracts clutter fast! Mark's right about the note; Ron isn't good at subtle hints.

Sandy suggested an option I hadn't included.

Sparkle and Prefectdt did too - a stocking stuffer.

Paul wants me to enjoy it, however I introduce it to Ron.

Constance thinks I should enjoy it myself first. Hmmm, I like that idea.

PK wants it out of my house, pronto. Carly and Kate agree with her.

Apple hasn't tried hers for spanking (yet) but came up with a great idea for another post. Thanks!

Ms Betty and pmduo voted for the suggestion that works best in our house. Ron has never ignored a hint that obvious. Although it may end up back at the thrift store if it's as bad as some of you say it is, I'm going with this one.

The question now is: when?

PK said...

Get rid of it yesterday!!!


Hermione said...

LOL. Now I'm really curious to see what it's like.

I bitterly regretted buying the bathbrush at first, but it's now become very useful for stress relief. I hope the BS will find its niche too.

Scunge said...

You'll regret it! Oh and you may have seen me on other boards with my other name which is Scunge.

grace said...

OMG! Have I NOT warned you about this? Have I NOT done my civic duty to tell you how evil the BS is?

In good faith, I cannot vote on ANY of these. I vote you donate to my BS bonfire that I am going to have.

Seriously? I am against BS, of any kind!


~I'm dying to know how this turns out!~

Anonymous said...

Hello Hermione,

Here in the Netherlands, we have a saying:
If you say 'A', you have to say 'B'. I think in this case, that would be true. You bought it, now you should get spanked with it ;-)

Seriously though, I personally feel that I should not withhold implements from my disciplinarian. After all she uses them for my own benefit.

Hermione said...

Kate - Hi, Scunge!

Grace - I'm due for some special attention tonight. Maybe I might leave it around where he will see it.

Maybe not.

Mark - I agree. It's just a matter of when.

I will let you all know how I feel about it after i Feel it.