Spanko Headlines

The copy desk editors at several Canadian newspapers have been hard at work creating headlines that immediately make me think of spanking. The articles themselves usually prove to be much less interesting. Here are a few that I have collected over the past few weeks.

Canadian Paddlers put World on Notice

Some Canadians are very adept at paddling naughty bottoms. This story, however, was about out Olympic kayakers.

What's not growing? Your bottom line

And a good thing, too! Most bottoms have curves, not lines. This informative piece was not about booties but borrowers who were deeply in debt.

Top to Bottom

Not an intimate exchange of opinions between a spanker and a spankee, as one might think, but an item about a women's tennis match.

Paddling for a good cause

I'll take a good paddling for charity any day. These paddlers were raising money by travelling by canoe up a well-known waterway.

Earn Your Stripes

Advice for those of us who enjoy a good caning every now and then? Alas, the stripes this writer was referring to are found on jackets. blazers and pants.

Stars Earn Stripes

Believe it or not, this is a television show where celebrities take their licks on a military obstacle course. Bare bottoms optional.

Whip One Up

Or two, if it's cheeks that are being whipped. But you may have guessed that this article was about meringues.

Bad Boy's Bare Bum

An expose of how plumbers scam unsuspecting customers? Wrong. It's about Prince Harry's latest bare-bottomed escapades. What happens in Vegas doesn't stay in Vegas when you're third in line to the British throne.