Wednesday, April 16, 2014


We recently went to see Spank! The Fifty Shades Parody, and I'm so anxious to tell you all about it.

I bought the tickets online as soon as I saw the advertisement - after getting Ron's permission, of course. I was quite excited at first, but as the date of the performance drew closer I wondered if we might not enjoy it, not having read the book. I started reading it, but only got half way through before the show. Ron declined to read any of it.

When we arrived at the theatre, we noticed that the audience was made up mostly of 20 - 30 year-old women, in small and large groups. There were a few older ones like me, and very few men (I counted 16 out of maybe 500 patrons). We didn't see anyone we knew, but then, we stayed in our seats during the intermission to avoid the possibility.

The atmosphere was electric and the audience seemed very keyed up. Women were taking pictures of each other and chattering excitedly. The pre-performance and intermission techno music was way too loud, and the audience was even louder since you had to shout to be heard. It was more like an evening in a club than at the theatre.

The show consisted of three characters, no set and very few props. The first character was a housewife who - after sending her husband and children away for the weekend - was writing a romantic novel using the pen name E.B. Janet. Her characters - the innocent Tasha Woode and the handsome yet kinky Hugh Hanson - came to life as she wrote. Sometimes, when she had gone a bit too far in her fantasy, they would refuse to go through with what she had written and she would have to rewrite.

The significant features of the 50 Shades of Grey book were parodied, including the overly-effusive descriptions of sex, the overpowering effect Christian has on women, the strange documents and contracts he insists on, his wealth, and Anastasia's clumsiness, beauty and total innocence.

For example, in the book, Christian flies Ana to dinner in another city in his private helicopter. In the show, not only do Hugh and Tasha take the helicopter, but also a hovercraft, and finally jet packs.

There is also a brief mention of the first Twilight book, which 50 Shades is based on. E.B. Janet has her two characters running through the forest at the speed of light, playing vampire baseball, and sparkling in the sunlight. Then she deletes it, saying it's far too silly.

Another good scene came when Hugh takes Tasha home to meet his family. Apparently everyone in the entire family is exceptionally good-looking and everyone looks alike. (I haven't reached this part in the book yet.) Tasha gets increasingly confused as she strikes up a conversation with Hugh's mother, only to find out it's his father. Similarly, when she speaks to his brother it turns out that it's actually his sister.

The performance was extremely entertaining, and the actors were very talented singers and dancers. We both laughed a lot. Ron enjoyed it even though he hadn't read the book. It was very raunchy and sexually explicit, but luckily there were no children in the audience. The funniest moments were when Tasha came down into the audience twice - once in each act - to innocently ask audience members for advice about sex. We were both glad I hadn't chosen seats in the front row. The actors also made at least a dozen references to our city: the transit system, the weather, the university and nearby towns. This was no mean feat for a touring company performing in a different location each night.

Was there any spanking? No. One of the few props was a riding crop, but it didn't actually get used. Hugh sang an extremely funny song that ended with the line "I can paddle you forever, you can be my sex canoe,"  and several of the songs included references to spanking and bondage. There was also the small matter of anal sex, which Tasha repeatedly refused to have anything to do with.

The bottom line is, if you have the opportunity to see the show, by all means go. It's still on tour in North America. To further whet your appetite, here's the official trailer.

The hardware store scene from the show.

From Hermione's Heart


Anonymous said...

Thank you for the review Hermione. I will look online for shows in my area.


ronnie said...


Thanks for the review. Sounds like a fun show. Not sure if it has been in the UK yet.

I read somewhere that the novel was regarded as the fastest ever sold Paperback in the United Kingdom.


Roz said...

Hi Hermoine, thank you for the review. It sounds like a great and highly entertaining show. I admit I have read the books so this has me intrigued.


Our Bottoms Burn said...

50 Shades sold like hot cakes. The reviews from the spanko community were dismal. I did not bother to read it. Those interested can look at the website There are now two shows, 50 Shades and Harder. Looking at the trailers, it seems to be in the chick lit cat.

Hermione said...

Joey - I Hope it hasn't already been performed there. has a list of upcoming dates.

Ronnie - I wonder if it will make it over the pond.

Roz - I'm sure you'd love it.

Bogey - It is indeed chick lit. I'm not sure I'd go to see Harder.


Aimless Rambling said...

Thanks Hermione for the review. I'll keep an eye out.

Terpsichore said...

Thanks for sharing your review. It sounds like a fun night out. :-) Hugs

Autumn said...

Glad you enjoyed it! As someone who guiltily enjoyed all of the books (as unrealistic and awful a representation of BDSM as they were), I would really like to see this!

Minielle Labraun said...

Sounds fun! I admit to reading them... And skimming when it was boring!
Maybe it will come here!

Erica said...

Sex canoe?? I almost spewed my coffee. :-D

Anonymous said...

Thanks for the rave review. We will try to see it if in town when it plays here.
bottom sup

ricky said...

Great review, Hermione!
I'd love to watch all the audience's good ladies' reactions!
A few years ago Toronto's 2nd City
did a parody of young adults enjoying the Stanley Cup
Playoffs on TV at home, where one innocent, but enthusiastic, non-hockey fan lady eventually asked,
"You mean there really are no
penalty spanks?"

Hermione said...

Leigh - It will probably arrive at a venue near you someday.

Terps - It was fun, in a strange way.

Autumn - I know you'd love it!

Minelle - I hope so.

Erica - Yeah, pretty corny. I enjoyed the "paddle you forever" part though.

Red - I hope you get to see it.

Ricky - I love Second City, but guess we missed that show.


Unknown said...

Thanks for the review!! It was in my area forever, but we never got around to seeing it. I wondered if it was any good! :D