Wednesday, July 3, 2019

Disciplinary Headlines

I'm a big fan of newspapers. Not online, but actually on paper. My high school summer jobs and my first full-time job were at daily newspapers, so I have a special fondness for the smell of newsprint. We subscribe to three papers, plus the weekly free paper full of coloured advertising flyers as well as local news.

Last weekend I saw not one, not two, but three headlines that set my spanko senses tingling. The first was in the national section. It read:

man convicted of impaired paddling

Silly fellow, he must have had a wee dram before putting his victim over his knee. But who called the cops?

The next one was among the international news items, and referred to the televised debates held last week.

[Candidate] takes hard beating at Democratic debate

I didn't see anyone leave his or her podium. it must have been a congratulatory spanking backstage afterward.

The third headline was in the Sports section. Now, you know how common spankoesque headlines appear there, but this one was different. The headline was:

In a pickel

It caught my eye because the word "pickle" was misspelled. I quickly scanned the article to see if the subject was an athlete named Pickel. I didn't find that individual, but discovered that there is actually a sport called pickleball. Ever heard of it? I hadn't, but the equipment is fascinating.

Aren't the balls pretty? But that's not the best bit. The balls are propelled by a paddle.

Mmmm, yummy!
From Hermione's Heart


Anonymous said...

Years ago in a Minnesota paper a woman took her husband to court, assault and battery charges. She was standing and not seating and when asked why by the judge she said her husband spanked her, the judge said this is the assault and battery charge, yes your honor she replied. She was then told to tell why she was spanked and she said it was for overspending. The woman judge then said since you cannot sit you were spanked on the bottom. Yes Your Honor she replied. The judge then said the case was dismissed and that the spanking was applied where a spanking should be applied and that the spanking was justified. The woman was shocked, the husband was smiling, and then the judge added, sir your wife needs another spanking for her behavior in this courtroom just now. The husband smiled and said she will be properly spanked when we get home. The judge smiled and said have a good day. It was later reported that she did indeed get a spanking that day, her husband provided the information to the press.

QBuzz said...

One of the kinkiest finds of my young spank-curious life was when I came across a lowbrow newspaper reporting on the 'scandal' of a female soap star who liked to dress up as a schoolgirl and get spanked. Her boyfriend had sold the story and they had pictures of her in her school uniform and everything! The headline was 'Spendies Lead to Bendies' if anyone is interested in googling it...

Roz said...

LoL Hermionegranger funny how we see things through kinky eyes lol. Love these! Hadn't heard of pickleball, interesting.


ronnie said...

LOL. Good finds. I'd never heard of pickleball before. Thanks for sharing.


Baxter said...

An old friend from my hometown is retired and she told me about pickleball and how she plays it with other senior citizens. But she did not tell me about the paddle.It would be nice to get together with her and let her pickle my bottom with the paddle.