This week we discussed deliberately provoking the spanker in your relationship. Here's what you said:
Bonnie: I doubt that approach would work with Randy. When I want him to spank
me, I dress in a manner that he finds attractive, cuddle up next to him,
and caress him with my hands. Most times, one thing leads to another,
and a good spanking is part of the bargain.
Another favorite
non-verbal request involves dropping an object on the floor in front of
where he is sitting and then bending from the waist to retrieve it.
Hiking up my skirt heightens the effect.
I also place a spanking implement in plain sight or simply hand it to him.
On
such occasions, we cautions me, "Be careful what you wish for." An
hour later, when I'm sitting gingerly on a very sore bottom, but feeling
relaxed and satisfied, I know my wish came true.
Downunder Don: Because our spankings are not "punishment" but are usually a reward,
herself never has to act up or misbehave to receive a spanking. All she
has to do is ask.
Nina: Hi Hermione, I think I have not done that, because punishments are so
not awesome. If I want the good girl spankings I have to be good, so I
rather try to be good.
abby: I have not, in a long time, tried to 'poke the bear' so to speak.
Maintenance happens every week, has for about 10 years. It is a hard
spanking, and I have no desire for a harder one. We also have a Friday
Play date, so that is pretty much 2 guaranteed spanking a week...not
counting the spontaneous ones...and the passing smacks on my bottom.
Wilma: When we first started ttwd, I had a conversation with a blogger ( who no
longer blogs) about her 'testing' her husband, by 'bratting' I suppose
you'd call it. Barney told me right then, "If you ever purposely do
that, we are done with ttwd". I don't think that would be the case
anymore, but I have never purposely done it. I think for me the
'attention' would not feel authentic if I manipulated the situation in
order to get spanked. That would be the main reason, but also because
punishment spankings are NOT something I enjoy, physically or mentally.
Roz: I admit I have done this in the past with mixed responses. As Willie
said, when it has resulted in a spanking it didn't always feel 'right'
and I didn't always feel I got what I needed/wanted.
Blondie: There were times in the beginning where I would "test" Ty by misbehaving
and seeing if he would follow through on a punishment. But when I
finally realized that I was an adult and he was not my caretaker, I
stopped misbehaving. Nobody likes punishment spankings at my house.
Luckily there are plenty of spankings around here that I don't need to
act out to get punished. Fun spankings are always the best and are
available whenever time allows.
Simon: Like Downunder Don I don't really receive punishment spankings as such.
There have been what I call stress relief punishments, Sometimes she
just needs to take her stress out on something and that can be my poor
bottom.
Dr. Ken: I've known quite a few women who have deliberately misbehaved, knowing
what my response would be to that. Not all women want to just ask for a
spanking--some of them like to "earn" it. Deliberately misbehaving is
one way to earn it. it's done in the spirit of spanking fun, of
course--the result is more "mock punishemnt", or "funishment" than
anything else. The result is still a very red and stinging bottom, of
course. I don't think disappointing me would work--we'd both wind up
feeling bad about it, and I don't know that a spanking would clear the
air....
arched one: Between punishment, maintenance and just because spankings my bottom is
well attended to and I do like maintenance and just because but hate
punishment so no I don't act up.
sub hub: Hermione, thank for the shout-out and for posing this question. I thing
for most of us that are the submissive one in our respective
relationships, we've all done this from time to time whether we want to
admit it or not. I would suggest that when it happens, it isn't
necessarily a conscious thought because we all instinctively know that
misbehaving on purpose, just to receive the disciplinary attention from
our Dominant is wrong. That being said, sometimes we just crave the
intimate attention that comes with being spanked and when that happens,
we might not know that we are doing it.
Thank you again for posting the question on your awesome blog! It's quite and honor.
It was my pleasure!
Susan: Once, never again. We had friends for a party; I had a blue satin dress -
very short flared skirt, and just covering me on top; sexy but tarty! D
warned me that if I wore it I would get spanked. I put on a more
demure dress, and he went down to our guests. I felt like a spanking
that evening, and quickly changed back into the blue dress before going
down to be met by whistles, but an angry glare from D. A while later, D
said to everyone, ' I told Susan if she wore that dress, she would get a
spanking, so now's the time' .
Oh no, not what I had intended; not in
front everyone; I had thought of a nice OTK later on, but it was to be
worse. He steered me over to the sofa, bent me over the arm, sitting
down to hold me in place, My tiny skirt had flipped up, to show my bare
bottom, with only a minute thong.He took a leather paddle from his
pocket, handed it to Jeff, 'You start, three from each of you". Everyone
was going to spank me - twelve by three made thirty six whacks on my
bare bum. Much later I scrambled back to my feet, my bottom blazing. I
stood rubbing the poor thing, as everyone clapped and cheered. Our
guests left at last, and I found myself where I had planned, over D's
lap for a sound but thrilling hand spanking on my still very tender
cheeks.
Ronnie: Oh yes I have and do misbehave and cheek P to get spanked. It adds to
the fun. I don't purposely disappoint P but I know I have in the past
and got spanked for it.
Hermione: Provocation would definitely not get the the spanking I crave. Spankings are rewards, not punishments around our house. It's much better to ask for one, or simply wait until the appointed day and time.
I'm always delighted to receive a suggestion for a brunch topic, so if you have a burning question in mind, please email me or leave a comment. See you all next week!
CHRISTMAS IN IEPER
10 minutes ago