Monday, October 6, 2014

Recap: Spanko Brunch 2.0 for October 5

The topic this week was changing attitudes toward spanking, and here are your thoughts.

Dan: It's hard to say. Our youngest adult generation grew up largely removed from non-consensual spanking, i.e. corporal punishment at school and at home. To the extent that adult spanko tendencies result from exposure to spanking as a child, it may be that there is less interest even if there is more tolerance. We polled readers on my blog recently about their ages, and I was shocked at the extent to which the over-50 crowd completely dominated the readership.

Dragon's Rose: In the local kink community, I am seeing more young people. Under 30. I think they know something is missing and are seeking it. Most of them end up with older dominants who put discipline first. In some areas of our society erotic spanking is gaining acceptance.

Six of the best: Hermione, in days of yore, spankings were much more of the punishment kind. While in to-days world, it includes the sexual and erotic world.

Jenn: It's hard to say, but certainly it's hard to be judgmental about a kink like spanking when gay marriage is legal in some states. I still think people don't want their friends and family to know. It's on the order of "swinging" or having a threesome with a neighbor.

River: I don't know about this. I'm 31, and though I like to think of myself as young, I don't know if I am for the purposes of this topic. I would like to think that people these days are growing more tolerant of things they don't agree with or understand, but that's not always true. I'm not sure it matters that much though, because marital spanking is private and doesn't necessarily need to be shared with everyone. And though it would be nice, if someone did find out, if they weren't horrified, but as we all know it's a complex thing. Some people just aren't going to get it.

Arched one: I agree with the rest, I just don't know. My feeling is like today there was consensual spanking going on it just was not discussed. However today many of us would not mind if a few people knew, and I'm guessing some friends may have a clue that spanking is taking place.

Baxter: Unless the Gallup organization does a poll, it is unlikely we will know the extent of spanking. It really is a private thing in that we will never know if neighbors or co-workers are into it. All of us have secrets. I suspect some of spanking, just little clues they inadvertently drop in conversation. It is fun to think about.

Bogey: I think the folks that are most uptight about spanking are spankos.

Bonnie:  I see two different historical currents pulling public opinion in opposite directions. There is a well-documented shift toward acceptance of alternative lifestyles. The hard earned advances of the GLBT community lift the kink community as well.

Simultaneously, there is a renewed focus upon eliminating domestic violence. This is an important and necessary initiative. However, some zealots refuse to believe that any woman could ever legitimately want to be spanked.

It remains to be seen how this cultural tug-of-war will play out.

Dan: Bonnie's comment is interesting, and it makes me wonder whether there the level of acceptance may also depend on the kind of spanking and the motivation behind it. I suspect that erotic spankings would not raise many eyebrows these days; not in an era where women of all ages seem to feel little embarrassment reading 50 Shades in public. But, I am not sure that the level of acceptance is nearly as high when it comes to F/m spanking or M/f disciplinary spankings. Regarding the latter, I suspect Bonnie is right and some would have concerns about domestic violence and, more generally, male dominance. And, I am not sure there is any real level of acceptance of F/m relationships.

Autumn: Gosh, this is a tough one. First of all, I'm still pretty young, and, secondly, I've been caught up in the bubble that is virtual spanko land since (ahem) high school. We're all so accepting!

But after seeing the reaction to Jillian Keenan's recent article, I think we have a LONG way to go in accepting spanking as a common sexual fantasy vs. a common childhood punishment. People do NOT want to hear that their child may be fetishizing their punishment. It's better for them to pretend it doesn't exist as a sexual fantasy.

Jenn: I thought about the domestic violence angle just as I hit the Publish button. People do feel compelled recently to advise women that they should not accept a man "hitting" them. I always say, "It's not hitting, it's spanking!" LOL The fact that she CONSENTS is everything. She can call it off if she wants.

Ronnie: I've read that in our community more young people are seeking it which is a good thing but still think we have a long way to go.

Hermione: I would like to think that people are becoming more tolerant of spanking. In my mind a good analogy would be two people of the same or opposite sex living together without benefit of marriage. At one time it was considered scandalous and not to be considered, or mentioned in polite company. Now it has become commonplace and scarcely raises an eyebrow.

That was an interesting discussion. If you missed it, please feel free to join in with a comment now.

From Hermione's Heart

1 comment:

Enzo said...

I still don't think it is changing all that much. I think it exists in pockets. I've said it before, but every time I think we are becoming more accepting as a society I just have to travel a few miles away from the big City to realize we have a long way too go.

I do believe it will change over time, but at the same time how much do people really want their private lives in the public eye? We are not talking civil, gay or women's rights here per say. In general terms we are discussing the private lives between two consenting adults.

It all depends on what level of acceptance we are individually seeking.