Welcome back, dear readers, to another weekend brunch. Today, let's imagine that you are trying to explain your love of spanking to a vanilla friend. You receive this reaction: "Spanking? But doesn't that hurt?"
How do you explain the paradoxical relationship between pleasure and pain?
Leave your reply as a comment, and once everyone has participated I will publish a summary of our discussion.
GAULISH WARRIORS
18 minutes ago
11 comments:
Yes, spankings definitely do hurt, but it's a positive sort of hurt.
An itch is an irritation of the skin that feels unpleasant. Scratching it irritates the same skin, but feels good. A well executed spanking is like that welcome scratch.
Besides, spankings shared with your lover are really fun!
Oh wow, I think Bonnie has explained that perfectly. :) And if it is not a fun spanking, one of the wonderful effects it has is that I can feel physically that I am forgiven, and it brings us closer too, as it is such an intimate activity. Awesome brunch question, Hermione.
hugs
Nina
How can you explain the paradox. The thrill of driving a fast car, the rush of skydiving, the tranquility of watching a sunset.....you either get it or you don't!
My answer - Well yes the spankings hurt, but the buildup to the event of desire and horniness AND then the time after of a warm bottom and some soreness are very enjoyable. Not to mention that the spanking awakens both males and females in that part of the body and the sex afterwards is incredible. So pain and pleasure mix in a wonderful brew of enjoyment.
Baxter
This is how I explained it to someone last year. I said it's kind of like having really sore muscles and when you get a massage, it hurts but feels so good.
Liza
It's like a good massage. It hurts so good.
A couple of days ago, one of the other bloggers had a post that compared wanting to be spanked with a runner. You know it's going to hurt but again it hurts so good.
Couldn't explain it better than Bonnie.
It hurts but it's a good hurt:)
Love,
Ronnie
xx
So many good answers here. I think it's that adrenaline rush when threatened, then it happens, and it fulfills that desire!
Yes, it hurts--no point lying to them about that.(They'd never trust you again if you said, "You're an adult, it doesnn't hurt a bit!") But I'd explain--or try to explain-- that spanking isn't just a physical act, it can push buttons on an emotional and mental level, as well. It's not just the sensation, but the setting as well. I'd emphasize the fun aspects of it--and if she agreed to try it, I'd make that first spanking as much of a fun experience as possible, including rubbing her bottom in between spanks and then aftercare.
Maybe it's like getting out of a nice, toasty warm bed on a frosty morning that also happens to be your day off, but something prompts you to get up, shiver, stomp your feet, and then wonder why you feel so good.
I've written about that on my blog (linked listed below). The explanation is based on the Opponent-Process Theory of psychology. It's the euphoria of surviving a stressful situation that we are looking for when we let a man redden our bottoms. The best analogy is that spanking is like going whitewater rafting or bungee jumping - a thrilling, if painful experience that is generally survivable. See my blog entry at http://startingoutspanking.blogspot.com/2012/08/opponent-process-pleasure-from-pain.html
See also this well-written blog post at gettingstronger.org: "The opponent-process theory of emotion"
Post a Comment