Each month, our friend Daisy shares a recipe that her family likes, and asks her readers to submit a tried and true recipe too. I'm posting mine here, and I hope that you will try it and enjoy it.
Vegetables go by different names in various places around the world. Zucchini is also called courgette or summer squash. I'll bet there are other names for it too, especially at this time of year when it is oh, so plentiful, and people leave baskets of it on their neighbours' doorsteps to get rid of it.
So, here's my special zucchini/courgette recipe. Why is it special? There are some spanking references in it, to make it more fun to prepare and to eat.
Baked Zucchini Chips
2 medium zucchinis cut into 1/4 inch slices
1 egg
1/2 cup spanko bread crumbs
1/8 tsp pepper
1 tbsp onion powder
1 tbsp garlic powder
2 tbsps grated parmesan cheese
1 tbsp rosemary, thyme or oregano
Preheat oven to 475 degrees F
Spray a baking sheet with vegetable oil spray.
In a shallow bowl, beat egg until it cries.
Combine spanko crumbs and seasonings in another bowl.
Dip zucchini slices in beaten egg with your left hand, then put them in the crumb bowl. With your right hand, coat the slices with crumbs. (A good spanker is ambidextrous.)Press crumbs firmly so they adhere.
Place slices on baking sheet and spray lightly with oil.
Bake 5 minutes, turn and spray lightly with oil (to increase browning), then bake another 5 minutes.
You can vary the seasonings to suit your taste, and of course, any type of breadcrumbs will do. These chips are not crunchy, but they're so yummy!
Please stop by Daisy's blog and check out her recipe for this month. Be sure to leave her a comment, and maybe even a recipe of your own.
We regularly watch Hell's Kitchen, that show starring the chef we love to hate, Gordon Ramsay. It's a reality show, with sixteen chefs vying for the top prize of being head chef at a high-profile restaurant. Each week, the teams complete challenges, and the winning team is given a luxurious treat, while the losers are punished. One competitor is also eliminated each week. In one episode, Chef Ramsay was scolding Holli, who had simultaneously overcooked the duck and undercooked the chicken.
"She needs a spanking," my husband observed. "That should be the prize for this week. The winning team gives the members of the losing team a spanking."
I thought that was a wonderful idea. Since the teams are the red team (women) and the blue team (men) the outcome could be very interesting. The red team had lost every challenge so far. But perhaps this would be their lucky day.
Ron had the right instinct about Holli. On a subsequent episode, she won a 1000 dollar shopping spree in a kitchen supply store, and chose blue-haired, macho Jay to accompany her.
We had heard a great deal of sexual banter between the two in the previous episode.
As we watch them in the store, Jay drops a wooden paddle into the empty shopping cart.
Holly (laughing) "A wooden paddle."
Jay "it's a multi-function paddle, Holli."
(Ron and I exchanged knowing looks at this point.)
Later that evening, they relax and flirt in the hot tub. Jay orders Holli to "assume the position" as she floats in quasi-OTK position over his legs. Holli replies, "This is one of my favourites." When they hear a third contestant coming to join them in the tub, Jay mutters "Hurry up" but then they are interrupted. Or perhaps it was skilful film editing at work.
It had been a long day, and they had reached the climax of one of the TV reality shows we watch regularly, but I was nodding off. Although I usually enjoy Top Chef and had struggled to keep my eyes open through 55 minutes of the program, I really didn't care who would be told to "pack your knives and leave". I was settling in, eyes closed, when I heard Ron say something about spanking.
"What? Where? Who?" I was suddenly wide awake.
"She does the spanking," he elaborated. I looked at the two judges of the competition. I seriously doubted that the lovely Padma Lakshmi (in the picture above) had threatened any of the chefs with a spanking. She wasn't Gordon Ramsay.
"What do you mean? What did she say?" I asked. But Ron was silent. Then I realized he had only said the "S" word to wake me up.
Isn't he clever!
Ron and I were watching a favourite television program the other evening when we heard the star say:
"A brazen blush on each pale cheek."
My ears pricked up and I blushed too. Ron repeated the line with a grumble about the language being a little too over the top. Then he turned to me with a suggestive grin and said, "I suppose you can relate to that."
He had picked up on the spanking innuendo after all. I laughed, "Of course. I'm going to write that down," and I reached for pen and paper before I forgot the exact words. "That will be the subject of my next post."
"So that one went right by you," Ron gloated. I didn't say anything.
No, of course it hadn't. But sometimes I think he gets irritated with my "all spanking, all the time" view of life, so I had kept silent. But it looks like my husband is starting to see things from a spanko's perspective, and that's fine with me.
Oh, right, you probably want to know more about the pale cheeks and their brazen blush.
We were watching one of the lovely Nigella Lawson's cooking shows.
You can probably see why it's one of Ron's favourite programs, and not because of the recipes.
The dessert she was preparing was called Eton mess - a combination of whipped cream, crumbled meringues and macerated chopped strawberries (that was the pale cheek) topped with more strawberries (aka brazen blush).
It was a rare sunny evening and we were taking full advantage of it. Ron was outside barbecuing steak and veggies while I took care of the other dinner preparations indoors.
The sunshine was making us both a little giddy, I suppose. I went to the door to see how Ron was doing, and waved. He gave me the finger. Oh yeah? I gave him back the same gesture. He grinned and repeated it with both hands.
This called for an escalation of tactics. I was wearing a t-shirt with nothing underneath, so I lifted it to show him my exposed breasts. Another grin from my barbecue expert.
I turned around, hooked my thumbs over the waistband of my shorts and panties, and pulled them down. Luckily I hadn't tied the drawstring on the shorts, and they easily slid down to my knees. I bent over and mooned the chef, then looked back to see the reaction.
Ron shook his finger at me. I covered up again, pleased with the appetizers I had served him before dinner.
You probably know that I have an interest in chefs, particularly when they inspire thoughts of gourmet spanking.
Last week we were preparing dinner together. Ron was in charge that night; he was making spaghetti, and had assigned me to mushroom-sauteing duty. For some reason he wasn't happy with the way I was doing it and snapped at me to turn the heat down.
"Yes sir," I answered and did as I was told.
"That's 'yes chef,'" he corrected.
"Yes chef. And will your sous chef get a spanking if she ruins the mushrooms?"
"You don't want to find out."
I have what is known in culinary circles as "chef's fingers" and can handle hot food with my bare hands without minding the discomfort. Taking that analogy one step further, I could say that Ron has "chef's palms" and can easily manage a hot bottom.
Who says we don't role play?
Gordon Ramsay is a very talented chef, a successful restauranteur, and the star of several interesting television programs. He has also caused me to wonder from time to time whether he might be "one of us".
Ramsay - an ex-footballer - is infamous for his salty language, especially the use of the F word. In fact, that's the name of his latest show, although in that case, the F stands for "food".
In Hell's Kitchen Gordon takes a group of sixteen aspiring chefs and systematically reduces them to mincemeat as, one by one, he eliminates them from the show. The last standing contender will be given a restaurant of his or her own to run, and Gordon is merciless in his demands for perfection.
Ramsay's Kitchen Nightmares is a somewhat milder but equally entertaining show in which Gordon visits a struggling restaurant and, in the course of a week, rights all wrongs and gets it back on its feet. It's often difficult to understand what's being said, because the network insists on bleeping any naughty words, so the dialogue is often mutilated to the point of being incoherent.
My suspicions about his disciplinary nature were laid to rest when, in a recent episode, he told a young chef who was bent over a counter adjusting the garnish on a plate that "I'll cane your ass!" and the young man grinned in embarrassment.
I thought so.
Posts
