Friday, May 27, 2016

Friday FAIL

Are you tired of using the same old spanking implements day after day? Are they starting to look threadbare? Is the wooden paddle developing splinters, or the leather belt wearing thin? Here are some elegant, if costly, replacements for those cheap, handmade items.

The sterling silver and cherry wood spanking stick from Betony Vernon

Cost: $3,066

We're told this spanker's "anatomic handle" improves its "grip and overall balance." That sounds more like the description of a golf club or a sports car, but those are apparently the buzzwords you need to get anyone to spend over three grand on a stick.

A crystal-handled whip from Agent Provocateur

Cost: $290

This crystal-handled whip is the feminine answer to the cherry wood spanking rod. The site calls it "the ultimate in feminine domination." The crystal handle will add an air of dignity as you spank your partner.

Gold handcuffs from Kiki de Montparnasse

Cost: $425

These handcuffs are plated with 24-karat gold -- use them as restraints while making love or spanking that naughty partner. Also, they double as elegant jewelry. Seriously. The keys are attached to a gold necklace and the cuffs split apart into bracelets, which the site seems to think people might want to wear earnestly. Accessorize your romantic wardrobe, suggesting to your lover the infinite possibilities the evening will bring.

If you are interested in other elegant and high-priced bedroom toys, read the full article here on Cracked.
From Hermione's Heart


Anonymous said...

Thank you but no thank you a little too rich for me. we will stick with what we can buy at the local shopping center or on line.

Roz said...

Wow, they look awesome but a bit rich for me too I'm afraid. Thanks Hermoine, hope you have a great weekend :)


Aimless Rambling said...

Ridiculous prices for something that can be handled with just God's gift of a palm.
I'd be trading those in for something much more practical, like aloe, or ginger, or, or or.
Have a great weekend Hermione.

Baxter said...

a fool and his/her money will soon be parted. This does fit society. Whereas I have a 2006 Jeep that starts and runs well, others need a Range Rover. In my town, there are a lot of homes that cost $500K to $2 million. Mine is worth about $280K. I don't get the need to have such expensive stuff when normal ordinary things will do just as good. But as they say, if someone makes it and puts a high price tag on it, somebody will buy it. Crazy. a $2 dowel from Home Depot would give just as good a caning as something worth hundreds. OK, off soapbox.


ronnie said...

Love the look of the crystal-handled whip but far too expensive.


Erica said...

I like the platinum and diamond vibrator. Talk about coming into money...

Cat said...

All very lovely but much too rich for my blood. ;) Thanks for sharing, Hermione.

Hugs and blessings...Cat

Fondles said...

The Luxury collection on Enchanted Pleasures
also has a bunch of super costly toys and jewellery. I couldn't believe my eyes when I saw the price tags!

They do have some interesting stimulating g strings tho.

Hermione said...

Arched one - I am inclined to agree with you.

Roz - Thanks! I will.

Leigh - They sure are for the person who has everything.

Baxter - Some people just seem to require expensive things to bolster their own self-esteem. I've always wanted a Jeep!

Ronnie - It really is lovely, but who can you show it off to?

Erica - ROFLMAO!

Cat - Mine too.

Fondles - The g strings sound interesting.


WendelJones said...

They are a bit pricy. Would prefer to spend 3 grand on a trip.

This was a nice implement we recently purchased at Bed Bath and Beyond. Plus they have 20% coupons. It has tanned up the misses’ back side quite nicely of several occasions.

Have a great weekend Hermoine!!!!!