Wednesday, August 18, 2010

Naughty Words

A recent article in a daily Canadian newspaper said that women like it when men "talk dirty" to them during intimate activities, and that some men try, but don't do it very well. What I found remarkable was the frequency of statements that I perceived to be refreshingly non-vanilla.

The author did a little survey of friends and found that women do like to hear naughty words, but rarely did. One woman said that once she found a man who used them "the kinky dialogue that ensued made her feel more sexually confident than ever."

"Pleasure begins in the brain and... [talking dirty] operates within the realm of fantasy, and fantasy is the match to the fire."

Part of talking dirty can involve theatrically using the language of degradation. Men raised by feminists may have a problem with this, but there shouldn't be one "if it's what a woman wants to hear." A conversation about pornography may turn to "the idea of a woman being tied up or spoken to in a humiliating fashion should not be arousing, and yet there are women who are turned on by that... It's sometimes the woman who wants to be playfully humiliated who takes the risk in asking."

I especially like the way the article ends.

"The key word in role play is play...And what if you try to play and your girlfriend tells you you're bad at it? Well, then, maybe you have the wrong playmate. Or you could ask her if she needs to be punished for that."

From Hermione's Heart


Bonnie-jo said...

"Or you could ask her if she needs to be punished for that." I'm quite surprised the article said this...but entirely pleased!

Our Bottoms Burn said...

Words can be VERY powerful on both genders. I have always enjoyed deducing the right words that a woman wants to hear when she is close to orgasm, saying them and watching her convulse. What a high.

Becall knows the words that most affect me.

ronnie said...


Interesting article. I thought the same as Bonnie-jo, surprised the article ended with that.

The right words at the right time can be oh so powerful :) A friend told me she used to go out with a lad who used to "talk dirty" but every time he did she kept laughing, relationship didn't last long :)

The sign is great.



One Inch layer of Dust

Overflowing trashcan

Smelly toilet

Is anyone turned on yet?

But seriously, from a mans point of view, I think it is unwise to talk dirty to a woman until you have known her in an intimate way for a while. It may be a turn on but it also creates a situation where it is easy to trip a woman's "oow, icky" switches very easily, when you do not know what that particular woman considers her borders between talking dirty and being out of line.


Hermione said...

Bonnie-Jo - I was surprised too! This was from a conservative paper.

Bogie - Yes, words are powerful. That sounds like an interesting experience.

Ronnie - I think i might laugh too. And I'm glad you like the sign.

Prefectdt - I agree. Talking dirty has many connotations, and what's a turnon for some would be the opposite for others.


Michael said...

Great article, Hermione, and congrats on being Chrossed. :)

Hermione said...

Michael - Oh my, I never dreamed he'd pick this post. I'm always ecstatic when I get Chrossed!