This week's brunch topic was self-talk, and there was a wide variety of opinions on the subject. Here's what you had to say:
Michael: Great question, Hermione! I definitely engage in self-talk when spanking
my lovely Season. It usually concerns where to place the spanks upon
her tantalizing tush. I say to myself not to spank too high so to stay
away from her kidneys because when that happens it is painful instead of
squirmily ouchy.
Also, I try not to leave dark bruises on her
bottom but instead strive for an overall glow with some red marks mixed
in so I tell myself to cover her entire backside and not concentrate on
one spot or side too much. This requires a delicate balance as during
discipline spankings (usually during role play as Season is mostly a
good girl.....mostly) I will briskly spank the same spot repeatedly to
drive home a point.
Joey: When I run, I will focus on each step and repeat "One step at a time"
rather than how many miles left. When I am spanked, I focus on each
stroke and repeat "You can take one more." Using that phrase gets me
through most hard spankings.
Simon: Sometimes if I am beginning to really feel the punishment my Mistress is
giving me I begin to wonder if I can take it. She gives the strokes of
the paddle,strap or cane in set numbers and then gives me a little
breather. I find that working out the percentage of strokes that remain
helps me get through them. For instance if I am receiving 24 strokes of
the cane and I have taken 18 knowing that I have only 25% left helps me
endure the remainder.
Six of the best: When I use the cane on a lady's bare bottom, I sometimes repeat the
words "It's six of the best for you, my naughty lady. Six of the very
best, on that naked rear end of yours."
Bella: Whether it's a punishment or a maintenance spanking, I always think to
myself "This is for us. This will reset us, release guilt and anger." I seem to be able to set aside the pain and focus on us when I keep reminding myself of this.
Saiorse: I'm a big believer in self talk. Say the wrong things often enough in
your head and you believe them-and the opposite is true, too.
But-having said that, I have to admit that often I am having rude
thoughts in my head, varying, from: "Oh for Pete's sake- is that the
best you can do?" "Find a different spot, d---h----!" and in response to
his frequently muttered comment, uttered reverently while he admires
his work, running his palm over my flaming ass (You should feel that!) "I
AM feeling it you, Idiot." I have, for the most part, mastered the art
of keeping these thoughts to myself. And when the intensity does
ramp up I have fine tuned the ability to zone out, and then flying into
subspace-which I understand many do not approve of....
Julia: That is a great question, but I, as the receiver, try not to think
during because I feel that would take away from DH. I feel like it
would be rude, therefore, I am just all ears!
Prefedtdt: I don't so much self talk as self sing. During the early part of a
spanking, before the magic happens, when it is just horrible pain that
has to be toughed out, this is when I mentally sing. The song does not
come out loud but is just in my head and it does help get through the
harsh part to the good bit. The song is
Be My Enemy by The Waterboys.
Daisychain: Self talk? Yes, sure...it goes "oww, owwwwww, shi*, that hurt...owwww..." then more of a similar nature...
Lea: "I think I can, I think I can..." "Oww mother *#@%! Don't curse out loud!"
It
really depends on the situation. Sometimes I'm just trying to take it
all in and get through it, other times I might be pleasantly zoned out
and not thinking much of anything.
Dragon's Rose: I think the paddle does all the talking necessary. It gets the message across without much input from me.
Self talk? "Oh CRAP that HURTS!"
Spanking Resource: I often times find myself keeping a count in my head while giving a spanking. There is usually a tempo behind it as well.
Reneerose: Okay, since we're new at this, I say "ouch" out loud, and then when he
backs off, I think, "No, harder! don't stop!" but of course I don't say
that out loud (sigh).
Welcome, Reneerose!
A-Non: Even with my admittedly limited experience, I agree with
reneerose~closetgirl. I want to be able to say "ow" but have him
continue - a little harder.
The need for some sort of mental
strategy is something I realized when an expert gave me one of my first
spankings. I told him afterward, "I realized after it started to hurt
that I didn't have any sort of a strategy for dealing with the pain,"
and I didn't really like the pain! Lol - so inexperienced! He said that
some people tell themselves, "I can take it. I can take X more" or "I
can take anything for one minute."
So far with my boyfriend I
have always wanted more, though I may have met my match in that wooden
paddle! Just four good swats with that thing and I was wondering if I
should burn it! I guess, in general, I would tell myself that I can take
it and that it won't last very long. A second between spanks and only
16 spanks would be less than a minute. Also, I would be thinking,
"That's the last one! Please??" if it ever gets bad. If I go to the
corner, I know there will be more to come, so I would just be panicking,
"It hurts so much. How can I take any more?? But there will be more."
Repeat.
Ronnie: Good question Hermione.
Depends on the spanking I'm getting.
Sometimes it's the usually owwww owwww, god that's hard and telling
myself not to swear and to breathe.
Other times I'm just in another world and not thinking of anything.
David: Hi Hermione good lunch topic. I`m usually to busy crying for misbehaving
again but I keep telling myself to keep my bottom up and legs straight
so I don`t get extras on the back of my legs.
Ana: This one made me laugh out loud for real! 99% of my self-talk is not
fit for public viewing. Mostly about how I can't take it and it hurts
and I can't do it...but add lots of colorful words to those sentiments.
Others might find it disrespectful, but I do keep it silent and find it
helps me to be calmer afterward.
Didi K: I am not part of your "club", so if I am not allowed to comment please remove this! :-)
My inner dialogue is very loud and cheeky! I spend most of my time thinking either
A: I know he loves me, and he is doing this for me, so I will not complain that it's boring.
B: Should I say ow on this one...no no it could get a little harder and I'd still be ok, is this..noo...WOWZERS! OW OW OW OW OW~
C:
How do I tell him that he has hit the same dang spot 10 times in a row
and I can tell it's bruising up while the rest of my derriere is white
as ivory.... if I tell him he is going to hit that same spot harder and
tell me to not direct him... masybe if i shift a litttle OUCH! bad
plan... he caught me...
D: How strong am I really? How much do I really trust him? If
I "safe word" he will stop immediately, but it means that I am taking
control...do I NEED to take control, am I really in danger, or am I just
uncomfortable and wanting to take charge... I'll let him keep going.. I
trust him.
Sometimes I sing in my head...sometimes it comes out and then...well. let's just say I don't sing anymore. ;-)
Didi, thank you for joining us today. Anyone with an interest in spanking is very welcome to read and to comment here.
Sublime Wifey: I don't always have the same mantra, but I do tend to float between a few.
I
tell myself "You asked for this, now take it" when we first get
started, because I was the one who asked if we could introduce spanking
into our play. Joeyred's "You can take one more" has helped when the
going gets tough. When I can hear that he's really enjoying himself I
starting thinking "Damn! That's good!" on every stroke. And when it
hurts like all get out I think "Don't tell him to stop," because I know
if I say it he will stop and somehow I will feel like I lost the game.
Hermione: I usually say "Ow" out loud, but if I've been told to be quiet, then I say it to myself over and over. At other times when the implement is very severe, I will repeat "Breathe" to the rhythm of the strokes.
It's been fun having you all here for brunch today. Bonnie will be back next week, and she's planning something special. Happy St. Jean Baptiste Day to all my friends in Quebec.
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